Providing for my family

My husband is 47 and was diagnosed with schizophrenia 3 years ago. We live in the house with his mother who has dementia and she has a home health aide who takes care of her. This is costing a lot of money which is coming out of her bank account and within a few months it’s going to run out. When this occurs she will likely end up in a nursing home and we will be out on the street because I don’t make enough money to support us. I talked to my husband about me trying to get a management job at work but if I did I would have to depend on him to get our son to school on time starting In September. He told me he doesn’t think he can handle that right now since he got out of the hospital 3 weeks ago after having another psychotic episode. We have been arguing over this because I am very worried about where we will end up and we have a 10 year old son that I need to provide for. I feel he is tying my hands over this and I really don’t know what to do. If anyone has advice or has been in the same situation, please let me know how you handled it. Any tips would be helpful! Thank you.

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@Ginger Just wondering of your husband has begun receiving Social Security disability benefits yet?

Yes, but it is not enough to support us. I live in central jersey and rent for a 2 bedroom apartment is expensive. But the real issue I am having is feeling that he is holding me back from making more money to support us when we have to move. I am the type of person who has no problem working around the clock to make the money we need regardless of the job. The job I have now has potential to go up the ladder but he is afraid that he won’t be able to take up the slack at home to enable me to do what I need to do. My mother Inlaw is getting worse with her dementia as she is not able to bathe by herself and I know it is just a matter of time before she has toilet issues. When that happens she will have to go into a nursing home as I cannot quit my job to take care of her and an aide for those types of issues is way more money then what is being paid now. I try to explain this to him and he just doesn’t seem to get it. He thinks it will all work out when he doesn’t realize that money is what is required to make it work out. Thanks for your reply!

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Can you ask the school for support? Maybe another parent would be willing to pick up your child too?

@Ginger I know you said your mother in law has a home health aide but Medicare should provide for a home health care aide for your husband also (with a doctor’s referral usually) and that aide would help your husband accomplish whatever tasks needed to be done at whatever time necessary. Might be worth looking into. Here is a link to services Medicare provides for if that helps. https://www.medicare.gov/coverage/home-health-services.html