… and how to address to your own snobbery.
Published on October 21, 2014 by Susan Krauss Whitbourne, Ph.D. in Fulfillment at Any Age
Whether it’s through wearing brand-name labels, pouring drinks from the most prized wine bottles, or just putting on the presumed airs of the upper class, people who engage in snobbery can make us doubt our own self-worth.
Snobbishness doesn’t have an exact psychological definition, which is surprising given how common it is to encounter people who display this behavior. However, we can assume it represents at least some degree of entitled narcissism in which people think they’re better than everyone else. Social class and socialization undoubtedly play roles as well: People born into families with qualities that society values, whether it’s education, wealth, or status, may grow up with a sense of privilege because they’re just used to getting special treatment.
•Do you care more about the label of your clothes than their functionality?
•Do you stay away from people who you think are “beneath” you?
•Have you become more fixated on the outward trappings of success than feelings of inner contentment?
•How conspicuous a consumer are you?
By confronting snobbishness in yourself, by refusing to let yourself be the victim of someone else’s snobbishness, and by avoiding ingroup-outgroup bias, you will be able to take pride not in feeling better than someone else, but in overcoming this all-too-common human frailty.
This part really jumped out at me… Has set a deep ponder in some of my own snobbery.
I sort of snob it down a bit with my anti-consumerism… my humble racial origin… my impatience with people who don’t seem humble enough…
My gf told me… that she’s gotten to know me better and realizes that I “humble brag” / “brag down” a lot. I’ve been working on trying to be nicer to people.
It’s sort of odd… I’m sure every human has their own form of snobbery. I guess it’s how extreme it gets that is the heart of the matter.
I’ve had some interesting conversations with my daughter about this. She once had a rather notable meltdown when she just had to have an Aero Postale jacket because all the other girls have them. Protestations to the contrary, she got a plain one from Work Wearhouse for 1/3 the price. I told her that the technical word for someone who pays their own money to advertise someone else’s product on their body is: dumb@$$.
She also hates it when I drop her off at school in my minivan. Said van is nearing 30 years old and can be best described as ‘crufty’. It’s the vehicle I use when I’m out on a photography trip or to haul DJ equipment in. I don’t worry about scratching the paint or getting a ding in the side because it was never beautiful to begin with. It’s a work vehicle that is intended to take a beating. Apparently some of the kids tease her. I always get begged to drive her in my Grand Am, which will be living in the garage for the rest of the winter. The sports car is OK. The van with duct tape holding the odd piece on, not so much!
Anyhow, this is a recurring conversation with a young teen in the home.
The value of an item doesn’t transfer to it’s owner.
You are only a caretaker of an item, and depending on how much quality it has to begin with, and how well you have cared for it, that will determine if it passes on to another caretaker, or ends up in the trash bin.
The fashion industry is brilliant, and filthy rich, thanks to people who feel they need these items to make up for some actual character deficit because they have more money than brains.
I find the psychology behind selling things to be facinating. How to get people (and their friends) to pay a lot of money for things they don’t need is truely an art.
I’m not anti-label, I do like some brands, but I do not like attention of any kind directed towards me. I tend to tear the labels off-If I like it, that is good enough for me.
I also discovered that a large black “sharpie” (permanent, felt tipped pen) will mute any loud, attention getting colors,like white on a dark shirt, bright yellows, oranges and greens- Cheese’N Rice! (how to say “Jesus Christ” successfully around those very religious folks) what was I thinking when I bought this?
IThe sharpie won’t run in the wash, but it does become transparent so you don’t lose the design, and it stays muted for a long time. May need to be redone after awhile to mute it more, but it harms nothing and no one.
No need to try to be what I’m not. I never bothered with these in high school either…unfortunately ended up in same city where I went to high school and some of these are ending up in power positions…So, I will admit it can be a problem but since the nervous and schizo, some of the ugly ones won’t even talk to me anyway once the area tongues got to waggling so no loss.
I just try to blend, even if the clothing is from thrift store but excellent condition/classic looks/durable mall brands. Unfortunately with the social problems, it isn’t this easy even in employment. As I get older, I feel even more ‘exempt’ to all the crap the younger ones demand. I don’t need to put this huge arse into that, I just go classics, flattering and comfortable for my social confidence and let the complaints/insults fly as they may. Some of the cities have more social harassment towards people in exercise clothing and demand preppy/dress look so even get flack stopping at grocery on way home from gym.
You gotta let the nutty, stupid stuff roll off. Lots think it is normal to sit on arse, charging it up on parent’s credit card while you wait years for the ‘right’ job to use your ‘college education’ and torment your parents with all the stress. Bankruptcy and minimum wage is the new style… Do you really want to buy into this ‘culture’? Most of us would not be sitting on arse if it wasn’t for the social problems/bias in some communities keeping us from professional employment, socializing and living independently…