My mother is a paranoid sz, she doesn’t take meds and she refuses to accept that she is a sz. She interprets religion wrong and makes up stories. Anyone else have this issue? Its so bad she gets kicked out of churches for acting up and yelling at the priests. She went to an aa meeting (she doesn’t drink either, because jesus is coming soon and she don’t want to be drunk because its a sin) and they called the cops on her for yelling at people when the cops got their she started dancing on the back of a pickup truck and singing about jesus. I remember being a child and she would tell me that the devil was watching me. She has other issues due to her paranoia, she thinks everyone is out to get her and put her in the hospital. She actually lost her car because she thought someone was after her, so she left her car and ran home. The other day she was screaming at people in kmart, screaming to random strangers, telling them they put her in the hospital, then ran through the store. My son was with her and her husband and he was so embarrassed he went out and sat in the car. Just the other day she was outside with barely any clothes on, cowboy boots and hat pretending to shoot at cars going by and yelling at cars. It made a local facebook post. Anyway, I don’t know what to do anymore, I am on Ativan to calm me down whenever she comes around because I will shake, her stories are insane. She thinks everyone is connected to the mafia and they are out to get her. I have too many stories to write about, I just really want a normal mother to bake with and shop with…its so frustrating! Oh wait I forgot one she recently tried to strangle my dog. My son came running into the room yelling “gram is trying to kill Bella,” I ran out t the kitchen and she is lying on the floor with putting my dog in a headlock and squeezing. I yelled at her and she hurried up and got up and sat in a chair like a little kid that just got in trouble. Please help me!
Welcome to the forum.
It sounds like your mom is very symptomatic at the moment. Your story of being in church brings back memories for me as my dad used to act out in church too and tell the priest off…
Maybe some of these links will help you to cope or understand what you are seeing.
http://www.leapinstitute.org/ - under resources are free videos on using LEAP
LEAP is a way of communicating to build trust. Listen-Empathize-Agree-Partner.
http://dramador.com/ - Dr. Xavier Amador is a clinical psychologist whose brother had schizophrenia. He is the founder of the LEAP Institute. Wrote the book: I’m Not Sick I Don’t Need Help! Can buy from his website.
Search Xavier Amador and LEAP on youtube.com and you should find some long videos
http://www.treatmentadvocacycenter.org/index.php - under problems you will see anosognosia
Anosognosia looks like denial but is different.
http://lesswrong.com/lw/e25/bayes_for_schizophrenics_reasoning_in_delusional/ - helped my understand delusions
Can also find some very useful information here:
Your mom needs help even if she doesn’t realize it right now. Have you tried contacting anyone locally about what to do? A crisis or mental illness line? I’m guessing if she is diagnosed that she has a psychiatrist? Have you talked to him/her? It may not be an ideal choice but perhaps a hospital stay of some sort to get her stable could be looked at. I would be concerned about what is happening in her thoughts to make her want to harm the dog. Perhaps voices are egging her on?
The religious aspect is something some people do. It certainly isn’t being led by God, as it is disruptive and chaotic…there is a place for disruption if there is something that needs disrupted, but that hardly sounds the case here.
Need to determine if it’s medical or spiritual in nature. Does the priest believe in and practice the removal or exorcism of evil spirits? Some do, and he should consider that route.
But a lot of these actions are enough for her to go in the hospital as they seem dangerous…being done around little kids, and that poor dog. While I am for avoiding hospitals if you can, there are some circumstances where it is necessary. I had to make a call myself one time for someone.
My mother doesn’t have the insurance for a hospital stay and she couldn’t afford it, people called the police on her but it just enrages her. I am the only person she talks to or trusts…besides her husband. I keep telling my kids that gram is stressed right now and you cant go with her, I am so scared she’s going to hurt someone. She’s getting more violent as she ages. Also, she has never said anything about hearing voices, but she did say she sees spirits before and talks to them. I think she’s delusional. I just have to educate myself and pray. Thanks for the help!
I am not sure about removing spirits because she has been this way for 31 years, I am sure its medical. She has been in the hospital 15 times (admitted) she even broke a nurses arm trying to escape, which led to her having the whole one side of the ward to herself, because they were scared for the safety of others. She never hurt me growing up, but she is very intimidating and tough. Thank you for your response
My mom is schizo or schizoaffective Her delusions are becoming more elaborate but she’s been off and on unwell for over six years now. She has good days where she appears more normal, and others where she doesn’t sleep. I just act calm around her. I’ve become more resilient and accepting of her issues but this morning she bought me a breakfast from Sonic and seemed in a good mood. Her delusions aren’t violent but she doesn’t trust my dad. She adores my younger brother and calls a lot to make sure he’s ok. She’s not really abusive, but the illness itself is abusive in that she can’t function like she used to.
I try to be calm around my mother too, but sometimes its hard because I have three children and she will tell these stories and they are inappropriate for children to hear, did I mention that when she has these manic moments she dresses very provocative and she is a heavier lady. I recently called her and she thought I was outback of her house and asked me where I was, I said at home and she says she don’t know where I live. I’ve lived in the same house for three years. I need to get her help, but don’t want to cause static in our relationship since I am the only one she trusts. Also, I appreciate your response, and I feel better that I am not alone in the world struggling with this issue. Thanks
Then maybe that angle should be looked at. Considering she has been hospitalized and in hospitals they give you meds, and she still became unmanageable so they had to put her in a private area…obviously the hospital and meds didn’t help.
I would say try getting her to eat better, take things and do things that improve mental health, but it doesn’t sound like she is really a listener, or would follow much advice like that.
Another thing…if she has meds that do help calm her down, that she has a prescription for, you could crush the proper dosage and put in a tea or juice or whatever. I did that with Lorazapam someone I knew had a script of but wouldn’t take them when she was having a panic attack. So I crushed one in ice T 2 times a day about 12 hours apart and she didn’t have panic attacks…BUT if anyone goes that route, DO NOT crush up any kind of time release pills! You can’t do it with those kind.
My Mom also crushed Ritalin in my food but i found out and would sneakily throw the food away…however, Ritalin wasn’t helping me, I did better in school without it, but the doctors said…
After they gave her medicine she calmed down and seemed normal, but whenever she gets admitted she is extremely difficult person, and becomes very scared, delusional and paranoid. I try to talk to her but its like she don’t listen and just keeps talking and talking about what’s on her mind and never lets you say anything. Also, I wish I could be by her side and crush her pills so she takes them but the truth is I have three children of my own to care for and her husband should do something, but he just wants to remain on her good side, its a very difficult situation. In addition, she does eat well and exercises. Her illness was inherited from my great grandpa she was unfortunate and received the gene. I just hope my children don’t get it. Thanks again for your response, I really appreciate the feedback.
while I am on the topic of my mother, it really hurts me looking back at the years growing up with her in and out of mental hospitals and her unable to care for me, she never brushed my hair or taught me anything it was always about her, and of course my father left and was mia…he left me in misery. I always got picked on in school for my clothes and hair… I had a huge knot in my hair that I couldnt get out so my hair was so straggly, and I was in kindergarten… god it was awful…My gram saved me a couple times, once when I was a baby and my mother didn’t feed me for 2 days and my diaper wasn’t changed for days, I was just lying in my crib. ive never felt important in my life sz sucks and it ruins lives.
if your momis delusional, you will not be able to tell her anything differently. Sounds like she needs to be in the hospital for awhile. As far as her meds are concerned, there are injectable forms that she could get once or twice a month. I agree with you-that her husband should help with this. There is no good side to stay on with her unless she is stable.
Is there a NAMI support group in your area? They might have some good advice. Your kids are the most important things-take care of them and yourself first.
Just a suggestion: maybe if you told your mom that you didn
t want her to act in certain ways around your kids-her grandkids, that you would have to limit visits. That is a boundary issue. Hope Im not sounding too harsh. Good luck to you
I was just about to suggest injectable drugs too.