Son Still in hospital

Son was in emergency room crisis center at his state hospital, Now, they have him I think in a psych hospital. I tried calling there where I think he has been taken and was told “We can neither confirm nor deny whether he is a patient here.” Great. Now I can’t even speak to my son by phone. His father and I don’t speak to one another except on rare occasions, and his dad won’t even call me back to talk about son now. I am so frustrated and angry! I do understand “patient confidentiality” issues here, but when you don’t even get answers to questions like, where did they take him? How long will he be there? What happened? His dad wouldn’t even tell me what hospital he was at. I had to start calling hospitals around the area to find him! How ludicrous is that?!

You have some strange system there. When my father was taken to one mental hospital by two cops and two emergency persons, they actually called me to notify that he had arrived. Then in another time when he was at one psych ward one month I was able to visit him every day and even talk with psychiatrists. I would suppose that you should be able to know where your son is, especially if he had been commited to the hospital against his will.

they wouldn’t let me talk on the phone either, except for certain hours, say 4-6pm.

yes, I think the entire process is broken.

but don’t worry, he cannot stay in there forever, and really not much you can do, so relax, go out for dinner. that’s what I think too when I’ve been captured. I feel the same coming out as what I did going in, not sure what they think they did or fixed. nothing in my opinion.

I was just reading an article the other day about how medical staff can disclose more then then do without going against HIPAA etc. If they deem the person unable to make the decision or it’s in their best interest to disclose to a caregiver then they can. However they don’t. I’m guessing they are to afraid of getting sued?

Hopefully your son will come around soon and call you. I’m pretty sure that once he is on the road to being stable that he will want to lean on your love. Hang in there.

Grumpy, the same exact thing happened to me when my son was first hospitalized back in 2008. Luckily, in my case, after a few days my son called me and after that we were able to talk daily on the phone at a certain hour. I can remember as if it were yesterday how frantic I felt.

Do you now know which hospital he is in? Barbie is right in that even without permission nurses can disclose some information; often if you keep on calling you will get one who will talk with you. Don’t be afraid to make a pest of yourself.

Things will turn around; you just have to hang in there and be strong. Keep lines of communication open and he will find you, of that I am sure.

You there in America have different systems than we have here in Finland. Once I was at the psych ward at the same time as my father was, but he was at the different ward in a different city, because two family members could not have been at the same ward. However I was told where he was and I was given a telephone number and we communicated with each other. The system here is just totally different.

I learned the trick of speaking in hypothetical statements. Start the conversation by saying, “I know you can’t tell me anything about my son, but I can speak freely with you. I believe he is there in your care. If my son is there, please let him know that I would very much like to be on his list of allowed callers. And supposing he would admitted, how long might he be inpatient?”

This is also the way you can share information with the care providers without them breaking confidentiality.

Thankyou so much to all of you! I am so frantic and feel helplessly left out. All today I worried about what was happening to him, was he ok, were there nice people there or mean, is he lonely, etc? A thousand worries! Such an aweful feeling…
I will also do what you suggested valleypenne. And Morgan, I am so glad that someone understands. I am frantic!
My daughter is the one who ended up calling me and letting me in on where he supposedly is. She shouldn’t have to be the one to do that, it should be my son’s father.
I haven’t heard anything else yet at all and no calls.

tell the doctor that you want a gene study, and look for these genetic traits in your son. if he has these genes, perhaps he prednisone may work

http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=7&ved=0CFkQFjAG&url=http%3A%2F%2Fcore.kmi.open.ac.uk%2Fdownload%2Fpdf%2F1569960&ei=xICkU7bUFMaNqAbl4YB4&usg=AFQjCNHwMWz8gl8g-QgK-DQh8-S59_BvaQ&sig2=7WxzkD9slN8pmQ5BsDMxqQ&bvm=bv.69411363,d.b2k

Schizophrenia is a TH2 dominant autoimmune disease possibly against
acetylcholine receptors of CNS

or perhaps a med to reduce the pyridostigmine bromide, i just got some of that because i have sumptoms of he autoimmune response against acetycholine in my muscles.

**Thats rotten that your ex is not telling you anything! Your son will probably call you when he feels a little better.**[quote="Morgan, post:5, topic:7392"] f you keep on calling you will get one who will talk with you. Don't be afraid to make a pest of yourself. [/quote] Thats what I did. The sqeaky wheel gets the grease!

Worked when I was the one hospitalized and my husband and I were legally separated, and he was on a business trip calling from England.
The staff nurse came to me begging me to talk to him to get him off their back, they said they knew they weren’t allowed to tell him anything but he wouldn’t give up. I was not in the mood to talk to him, angry that he wouldn’t leave them or me alone, but the nurses insisted I just talk to him, so I did. Worked for him.

Finally got to talk to my son today! My daughter had given me a payphone number for the floor and I kept calling that number once or twice in the evening. Most of the time no one would answer but tonight I got through!
Son sounds sad, bored, can’t wait to get out. He is happy that he said he is getting out tomorrow morning though. I feel so bad for him, it must be horrible to be in there.

He says he misses me and wants to come for another visit. I told him I want to see him too and miss him very much. I told him I will have to see though because I don’t get anymore vacation from work this year. (He doesn’t drive) and I would have to pick him up and it’s an 8 1/2 hr drive.

Miss him so much and you could just hear the disappointment in his voice when I said I’ll have to see if I can come pick him up.

One thing parents and caregivers can do is to talk to their loved ones about signing a release of information. Hospitals will talk to you if they’ve got permission from the patient. Make sure your loved one knows about this and is prepared to sign one if they get admitted. The hospital isn’t going to suggest this to your loved one, they’ll have to bring it up.

oh god,how pathetic…hope things improve quickly for you…hang tough

Son came home today from hospital. He’s happy to be out of there. I just hope he doesn’t overdo things now that he’s home. He already said he wants to go “walking” on trails with my brother. Walking is good for him but he just got out of the hospital! lol Oh well… I’ll bet he is tired from not sleeping well there too. But glad he’s out of there for now.

I’m glad your son is home. :slight_smile:

@grumpy123 How is your son doing?

Thanks for asking BarbieBF! So far so good but I know that with this disease things can change fast. But I’ll take the good days for sure!