will he take medication? My son is 28 and we have been dealing with same thing for 12 years. My son will not take medications. If your son will, he just needs to find the right one. Best of luck. Also, you need to find a NAMI support meeting for yourself. it does help.
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It is very hard to accept āwhat has happened.ā Our son is 24 now. Hospitalized twice - correctly diagnosed the second time at age 20. Takes Invega monthly and other meds. I feel like his future was stolen. Itās a hard pill to swallow. I try to find the positives - however small. Our son has never been aggressive and for this I am very thankful. He has lived with us since the diagnosis. He has had many jobs and keeps trying. I admire his persistence. He has also heard voices, been suicidal. The meds work - for the most part. I donāt know how he handles it all, but he does. Heās very empathetic and laid back. Heās the strongest person I know to be able to deal with SZ. A typical life is hard - throw in SZ and it so much harder. I know Iām lucky that my son is still alive and for that Iām grateful. Iāve applied for his disability and hope it comes thru (and hope he doesnāt earn too much in one month and be denied). Iāve tried to get his cooperation on this - some days he agrees, some days he wants to work/earn as much as possible.
Weāve set up a trust that will be funded with our assets after his father and I are gone. Part of the trust names a couple of people to oversee the trust and ensure that he has a place to live - whether that be group home or private residence. Currently, we support him with housing, finances, make sure keeps Dr appts (I usually attend) and take meds. These are the things that will be taken care of thru trust. Person named to manage trust will not do direct care - but have others in place that do and make changes as needed. He is able to drive, and handle day to day - personal care, food, etc. He socializes with a few friends - they are very important to him and I am grateful that they remain in his life - some are childhood friends. He seems ok/satisfied and just rolls with the punches - I try to do the same. Heās my hero.
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You are very fortunate with your son wanting to work, taking meds, etc. It is a hard pill to swallow, but he can live a somewhat normal life if he continues like he is. So happy for you. Its really hard, impossible to live with someone who is non compliant, like my son. We have also set up a trust for my son.
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Congrats on figuring out what meds work!!! I think it takes time . With my son I asked 25 per week room and board and then talked a lot about wat he enjoyed doing. He is a college grad worked stocking shelves , ups delivery helper, painter etc. he figured it out. Lack of motivation is a symptomā¦ stay strong and steady and check back inā¦
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Finding the right meds is a such a game of trial and error - which I hate. Wish there was a more definitive way. Iāve heard of blood test, but have yet to see a dr. use it. Iām glad we found something that works, too. Itās made a lot of difference when he can think clearly and we can reason with him much better. Love this website - has the best post/people. Find it very useful as well as supportive and hopeful. Best wishes to all.
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Hi Dee ,
Happy things are stable for you now , May i ask you where you found a caregiver for your son? . I also bought my son a 2 bed apartment , 5 minutes from me , i rented the other room to help pay bills but many times he felt threatened by her and her boyfriends . I was thinking about a caregiver but donāt really know where to start looking .
Hi Linda,
Finding a good caregiver to live in the 2nd bedroom was always a challenge. I actually let them live there free to give my son support but it never seemed to work out. I advertised on CraigsList/ Facebook/ Networking with NAMI / Peer Support organizations / Recovery Groups - I tried everything possible to bring someone safe who would be a good support person. I hope you have better luck! Iām sure theyāre out thereā¦
Another avenue that I explored for day-help was Caregiver.com. I found some nice people there to spend time with my son during the day. I wish you the very best in your search!!
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Thank you so much , take care and keep safe .
Hi Vvicin01, just wanted to send you my warmest wishes. Accepting the change our adult children go thru as a result of SZ is really a process. No one prepares us for it! Itās a journey of confusion, uncertainity and overwhelm. And very few people can really understand what we go thru. Itās really a family illness as it affects the entire family. Iām grateful we have this site and NAMI where we can get the support we need to meet this challenge.
We love our children and only want whatās best for themā¦ which makes it so hard for us. It definitely takes time for us to adjust to the reality of mental illness and I think weāve all done our share of grieving to get there. Today I am grateful for things other parents take for granted in their adult children. And although there are days that I still find myself in overwhelm and grief around the illness, I just keep showing up and continue to advocate for my sonās treatment, his housing and his overall well-being.
And I focus on staying strongā¦spiritually, emotionally, mentally and physically. Thatās my gift to myself and my son. God bless!
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Thank you so much AZHome. It is greatly appreciated. I also want to wish you and your family the best.
I am trying everyday to keep positive and really cherish the moments my son shows some glimmer of his past. Sometimes a simple joke or a smile, which he seldom has these days, brings joy to us. One day at a time. Thank you again.
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I am glad that your son found the right med and he can be happy. It must feel great for you.
I thought my son was doing good on Latuda when he first got out hospital then he said it made him through up and I caught him not taking all meds. I stressed the importance of taking meds and now he seems a little better but still seems to hear voices but he said he did not when he got out hospital. Now he is acting like a 12 year old teasing me and it is so frustrating. All he wants to do is go to store or park, computer or phone. I will just pray that he finds the perfect
meds to get him better.
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Hello
My son was diagnosed at 24, he has lived at home and is slowly getting better, functioning and critical thinking is up. I subscribe to the Brain and Behavior Research Foundation, it has helped immensely with so much support and info. Back in 2015, I read a mother of a son with SZ, who also helped the foundation said, A supportive family, a great doctor and the correct meds make all the difference. We went through a few doctors, meds changed 2x, better each time. Then a great provider who helped him in the onset, was so good, kind, respectful and changed his meds and things started to open up. I am preparing a trust for him, I do not know if he will ever be able to live on his own. I am also in my early 60ās and have health concerns. My faith in Heavenly Father and the love and care that we receive is what keeps me going. It is hard. I found out 5 years ago that the system can not help. I have to advocate for him, for me, and everyday get up, do my best and stay positive. I have no other family, not even his dad to help.
So you are not alone, and I just joined this discussion group and this is helping me to not feel so alone. There needs to be more for our loved ones, not sure how to make it happen. But I am thankful to have a place where I can communicate with others about this.
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You touch my heart! I thought taking care of a grown son with SZ with my husband was hardā¦ He doesnāt know what he does. Itās like a zombie walking around all day. No drive or interest in anything. I try to read what I get my hands on, but sometimes itās way over my head. I continue to do what I can because Iām not sure what will happen if something happens to usā¦ I hope family will help out. The meds are continuing to get better. Iām so sad for him.
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I have the book *Schitzophrenia for Dummies *. It really breaks down schitzophrenia. I had lent te book to a couple of friends who didnāt understand it. The book really helped.
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Please do not look forward to a time when he is off medication
I have to be blunt
Medication for psychosis is the only thing that keeps people with life long schizophrenia non psychotic
There is no other answer
No other treatment.
I will say that time without medication most likely at any point without antipsychotic meds, psychotic symptoms return and will usually escalate to a full blown episode
Further episodes if they are long term affect the entire being
And only luck to do with how generally compliant they are will create the possibility to take antipsychotics again and to once again have any chance against psychosis
There is an exception which is after a first episode schizophrenia they take meds and ALL symptoms dissapear
After a period of 6 months they may have a diagnosis reconsidered
Just covering that there are exceptions
Iāve never seen this, probably because it is short term
There is a chance of remission after age 30 for some if they started early with several episodes
With medication for life we can expect the best outcome of very long term remission
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three - I am beginning to learn that you might be correct. When my son was first diagnosed I thought that maybe this will in time clear up and he will return to his old self. I also thought that in time he would eventually be weaned off his meds. I am now starting to realize the impact of hisillness and the long term prognosis. He is showing improvements. He no longer hears voices or hallucinates - or is suicidal. However, there are other symptoms that have not improved - anxiety, lack of motivation or initiative. He is working part time and that I am really happy with. Thank you for replying.
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Iām so very sorry
Iām not a parent But twice over a sibling and sufferer I could have reacted with more kindness here
I think alarm bells ring when a parent is not able to accept it
And all I hear is the danger of not knowing the truth about medication
How most need it for life
It must be completely devastating for you
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Hello! Welcome!
Iām sorry to hear your son has schizophrenia. My son was 25 when he was diagnosed and has been on the monthly shot of invega sustenna. He is also on medication for anxiety and a couple of others, so four medications in all. Yes, the antipsychotic Ned does help with the most outward and scary symptoms, but as far as the lack of motivation and disinterest, and the loss of interest in previous things, that is the other side of schizophrenia. Itās really the core of schizophrenia. These symptoms are the illness. Medications can cause lethargy, and an appearance of being lazy. But your son isnāt lazy. Unfortunately, there are no medications that treat these troubling symptoms, which is why doctors tend to prescribe antipsychotic medication without offering more, because there isnāt more. My son is now 33 yea years old and has never lived outside of the family. He has no interests really, not much to say, and is rather sluggish but does care about us and we love him. Thatās about the most we can do. He has some chores that he does. He can cook for himself. He mows the lawn sometimes, sometimes shovels snow, helps with carrying groceries from the car into the house, but the only thing he shows interest in is music. He listens to music and smokes. Thatās it.
So just to reiterate, your son is showing symptoms, not side effects of medication. Please do as much as you can to educate yourself because you need to do so. I recommend Surviving Schizophrenia 7th Edition by E. Fuller Torrey, a psychiatrist researcher. Good luck and God bless you and your family and your dear son. The book is very easy, not too technical. And I consider it to be the best. There are many other good ones but surviving schizophrenia is really great. Amazon has it. Xo
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My son is seven years into his diagnosis and he doesnāt go anywhere. I still suffer as I cannot ever put the memories of his childhood, when he was bright and clever and sweet and the apple of really everybodyās eye who knew him, I want him to have fun. I want him to be happy. I understand that things probably wonāt get much more interesting for him and I understand really quite a lot, I read constantly, but I sure do wish I didnāt feel so sad all the time.
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I do that too, the making him laugh. Some days I say to him, āGive me a little smileā itās so sad to see them like this.
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