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Struggling with husband


#21

Jan- that is a thought that crossed my mind: that he may feel safe being locked up. I know I have been told by case managers from a few mental health hospitals that the patients feel safe while in the hospital because they are with people like themselves and there is a comrade among them. That and the fact that no one is judging them from the outside world. I do hope that is what is going on with him now as he has not called me to try to get him out, although there is no bail, or try to get him a lawyer, which I am pretty sure he knows I cannot afford one for him. I am thinking of calling the nurse practitioner who prescribes his meds and see if she knows anything. I think he will eventually end up in a hospital, I just hope it is not short term as this has proven to not work in the past. The short term hospital just pumps them full of meds at the highest doses, bring them down a little bit and release them 7-10 days later not knowing if the meds are working or not. He needs long term for med adjustments, life skills and management of his illness. He needs to be placed somewhere where people can watch him and make sure he is ok.


#22

From the original post:
My husband got admitted to a psych hospital, within 5 days they decided to give him the Invega injection and released him. He got the secondary shot yesterday. He’s 75% better! Like, almost back to his old self. We are supporting the shot with vitamins and amino that help offset side effects.
So far, I am seeing great results. Thank you all for your support!


#23

They also feel safe In a locked ward at the hospital because no one can get in to see them,unless they allow it. I imagine it’s the same with jail…limited interaction with others, surrounded by police, etc.


#24

That’s great! I tried to get my husband to do the shot but he refused to be injected with anything. I have read a lot of good things about the Invega shot…good luck, I hope it works for him and you!


#25

What is a public advocate?


#26

Love you,that was great. My daughters grown and doesn’t put up with much of my wife’s craziness but the heartache you describe in the end…ugh I know it really sucks.


#27

What I meant was someone who deals with the mentally ill-could NAMI refer you to someone?–who could mediate between the patient and legal system, free of charge.


#28

Ya I contacted NAMI and they don’t do that kinda advocating …ugh always deadends


#29

I know you are homeless right now…In my state we have a “Special Response” department which is a part of social services. I know that if you are homeless, they will help with paying for a “security deposit” for a place to move into. Also, thru Social Services they have programs that help with paying utility bills and food stamps. I don’t know what your financial circumstances are, if you are working or not, but going to Social Services in your county may help you get back on your feet unless you make too much money then you are sh** out of luck with asking them for help. Do you have any type of crisis units in your county? I live in NJ and the county I live in has a crisis unit that comes to your house with the police to evaluate the person who is ill and if the social worker thinks you need to go to the crisis unit, the cops are there to make sure you go…this has saved me many times. The crisis unit is part of the local hospital so maybe you should try calling your local hospital and see if there is something like that in your area or if they don’t have a mobile unit, ask them how do you get someone who is mentally ill to the hospital. Has she threatened to hurt you? has she tried to hurt you? Is she a danger to herself? I know one time I called them, I told them that he hadn’t eaten anything in nearly 5 days and that’s considered a danger to one’s self. He wouldn’t eat anything that was pink or in a pink container or even go into the refrigerator or cabinet if there was a pink carton/can in it which prevented him from eating. I know the police won’t take them to the hospital unless they are a danger to themselves or others. You need to do something regarding your situation for her sake and yours.


#30


#31

Yes I’ve had her hospitalised against her will 5 or 6 times in,last 2yrs and these hospitals are useless. The police have been involved dozens of times and know her by name but they know the useless mental health system in,NH. She has attacked me before and I got the police and they only brought her to the hospital I still had to sign her in and then they released her very early. She’s happy in,her madness so what I,need to do somehow someway is to recover/move on myself. I’m a road trucker so lotsa people live like I do. The whole thing is an,incredible heartache. This site is actually the only real support I’ve ever found.


#32

Did this help your wife/daughter? I have heard a lot of good things with the shot, but he won’t do it. He said that if he has problems, they can’t adjust his medication like they can with pills and we see how well that has gone. I, of course, do not know if this is true. I think he is paranoid in thinking they are injecting him with something that will track his thoughts or actions. My husbands paranoia has lent it’s hand to a lot of “conspiracy theory” if you know what I mean…all paranoia on his part. It’s sad because I believe it is worth a try, but he won’t do it.


#33

True that! This site is very helpful indeed. What does your daughter think of all of this? Is she involved in any way? I don’t think they are happy in their madness, I just think they don’t know any better when in psychosis. All logic and rationale goes right out the window when psychosis sets in. Most times when my husband came out of the hospital, he would tell me he feels better so I know on some level he is aware that his thoughts are not normal and that they torment him and stress him out. It’s just too bad that when those thoughts start creeping back in that he doesn’t realize he needs to get help. I think at this point, you need to do what you need to do to stay well.


#34

I’ve taken,my daughter to a NAMI meeting to introduce her to support. It was great she balled her eyes out and got a lot outta the meeting plus they gave her this huge gift basket. She knows there’s meeting near where she lives.
My wife has voices that really bother her but she refuses to do anything about it. I really hate it that we moved to NH but it was to raise our daughter decently which happened. I grew up in Cambridge Ma and had 2 sisters both were raped and one was murdered(they never caught the guy). If we still lived in Ma they woulda taken care of my wife a year or two earlier,NH really sucks for the mentally ill.


#35

Wife when she is in a bad way, the shot helps them want to take meds, when taking meds properly I dont give her one…