Although we’ve known all our lives that my mother had some mental problems, it wasn’t until recently that my siblings and I had our worst fears confirmed.
My mom has been having really bad episodes that have involved the police and her being taken to the hospital. While we haven’t been able to get any information due to privacy laws, we know that she was having hallucinations and was violent/verbally abusive to the police and hospital staff.
She’s refusing treatment and refusing to accept that anything is wrong, but she never has any memory of the episodes after the fact.
Does anyone have any advice on how to get her into treatment, when she’s refusing any help?
She’s currently at a psychiatric hospital, but they are only able to keep her for 7 days. If she passes the evaluation, then she’s free to go.
Each time after she’s gone to the hospital, she’s fine for a few days/weeks and then the next episode is always worse than the previous. This last episode resulted in her setting her house on fire. When the fire dept. arrived they found her sitting on the couch and had to forcibly remove her from the house.
Before this episode, she was trying to talk to us as if nothing had happened. Every time we mentioned the episodes or her seeking treatment, she would quickly change the subject. My siblings and I took a stand and told her that we loved her, but until she’s willing to get treatment, we couldn’t go on pretending that nothing was wrong. We told her how terrified we were of losing her and basically gave her an ultimatum, begging that she get treatment.
Now, I can’t help but feel horribly guilty. From what the fire dept. told us, it sounds like her most recent episode was a suicide attempt.
I feel like a horrible daughter. So many times I wanted to call her to see how she was doing, but the last time she spoke she was hallucinating and the conversation was rather traumatic. I just can’t pretend that everything’s okay, but on the same hand…I’m afraid of pushing her over the edge by bringing up the subject. So I end up not calling her at all.
My brother and I both live across the country from her and our sister, who lives near my mom, has a new baby at home. We’re all at the age where we recently finished college so we don’t have money for lawyers, let alone plane tickets and setting her up in a assisted living facility.
Also, we all don’t feel safe having her in our home. My brother and I both share our apartments with roommates and my sister has her baby to worry about.
So, all this to say: We’re lost. We’re terrified of her getting out and hurting herself, or someone else. If anyone has any advice at all, I’d really appreciate it. So far, we’ve run into nothing but red tape and options that we don’t have money for.