My wife and I (33,married 1 year 7 months) dated for a year before walking up the altar.
There were some issues that I just chose to look over and initially even believed
- she said a group from New Zealand ( where she had been a student from 2003…did not manage to complete despite changing 3 colleges as everywhere people were ‘ out to get her ‘) was hacking her phone and listening to everything we spoke on phone and were watching her change and stuff
- Everywhere she went she drew in new people like her workplace acquaintances into the whirlpool saying that they too were plotting against her
- Once she came home and fought with me saying she saw me talking to a girl at her workplace whom she believed was a part of the plot. I never spoke to her nor was I a part of any ‘plot’
- just out of the blue she would fight with me saying I called her a bitch. Of course I did not do that.
I rubbed it off saying that she’d probably misheard me.
She calmed down but the resentment was there
Nonetheless we got married, the accusations got wilder…
- Jesus came in my dreams and told me you are hiding something and trying to break the marriage
- she accused me of wanting to indulge in wife swapping with a couple who are good friends
- she would accuse me of saying weird and random things
- Once she drove the car so rash after accusing me of saying some weird thing that I thought she’d kill me
- final straw was after 18 months of marriage she accused me of calling her a CT and a ST out of the blue.
- generally she is a very sweet and a calm personality and goes to church at all times but when this hits her, she starts screaming and becomes evil eyed.
There is nothing I can do to argue with her beliefs
- she felt someone was laughing at her on the phone line. I got her phone checked up but nothing was found
She left the house and her parents think I’ve hurt their daughter, when I suggested a psychiatrist visit all hell broke loose. My wife though agreed to the visit with disgust, Her diagnosis came out perfectly okay even though she made some bizarre statements like …
1)He walks behind me and spies on me.
2) He goes out in the middle of the night to drink tea
3)He laughs at me together with friends and security
Her parents lied to the doctor saying that I had apologised to them for my behaviour to her
The doctors said she is well behaved and well dressed and did not show any symptoms of a disorder when they kept her under observation for 7 days
So now, her paranoia against me is grown more … she has blocked me off all telephonic ways of contact. Which she refuses to accept.she stays in the US now where she is studying.
I am funding her education and paying off her loan, she has got no regard for that.
Just for your information she has accused several people in the past who were her friends of wrongdoing. All of them left. She accused them of the same plotting thing.
To her, the beliefs are real and no amount of proof or convincing can help
Some people don’t even know what my wife thinks of them. To everyone she is a pretty young girl with a perfect life.
I love her and want her to get better. But her super overprotective parents and she are the biggest roadblocks. I’ve tried convincing them as well but got bombed.
She says I have been an indecent husband and that I have spoilt her life and that she does not have any trust nor faith in me…
I don’t know how to deal with this … This is sapping me of my life… Is there anyone who could give any suggestions ?
Thanks for reading this long post…