I feel sick and anxious because it feels like Schizophrenia is tearing everything apart. All the work and progress and energy that I have put in…it seems like it might end up being all for naught. It is so hard to be positive right now because I am just so exhausted. I know my family will never be a normal one, I just wish it wasn’t so much work to hold everything together. I have been working so hard for so long that I just want to let go… and logically, I know that it has been toxic for me… But I love my husband and my child so much and I have vowed not to let Schizophrenia scare me away from keeping this love alive.
I just wish SOMETHING was easy. Just one thing. Everything is on my shoulders and when things really start going down hill, I get so overwhelmed.