My sons drs prescribe him every pain pill known to man even though I have told them what he is doing with them! Beginning of month he front-ends his xanax and percocets. He either sells them, over takes them or trades them. Every month he swears someone is sneaking in his house and stealing them. Even files a police report. I watch him take 4/5 xanax bars 2mg each at a time on top of several percosets! He trades some for pot. I’m so afraid for his life! The dr know he does it, police, pharmacist I mean every body! I’m so afraid he is going to over dose, burn house down, something! So glad he doesn’t drive! He’s had tried to kill himself several times. He is a cutter. I’m so tired of doing this alone!!! And yet the dr just keep dishing out the opioids! Why can’t they just give sz meds and leave the others alone!!! Thank yall for being here!!
My son would do the same thing if he had them, and it is scary. He likes to push the envelope to see what drugs like that can do.
With opiates, when he had access to them, they took away all of his symptoms - the depression, the social anxiety, the general anxiety, the paranoia, and especially the delusions. As bad as they were, because they made him an addict, they gave him peace.
He’s been on suboxone for years, which is in its way equally bad. He’s tried coming off in the past year, which I think might have made him unstable enough to stop taking his SZ meds, then this past week stopped the suboxone & klonopin cold turkey, now he’s in the hospital.
I’d share my story of how much he’s taken, and combined, in the past, but I’m afraid it might be triggering for someone. All I can say is that I feel your pain, have been there in some ways, and have to say it’s one of the worst parts of this disease. But, I guess all the parts are pretty bad when they’re not under control.
You are absolutely right. . My son was taking all drugs he could find before he was diagnosed. Things came to a head last Monday when we meet with his psy and he dr told him he had two choices; take the pill or shot or get admitted into physc hospital. He chose the pill. But we are really pushing him to get back on the shot. He Was doing so good. Except for the fact that he would take, sell, or trade his xaxax and percocet during the first week and then complained somebody stole his medicine so he could get more. Or so he thought!! But those last couple weeks he was normal. No rage or outburst, no cussing me out for no reason and we would actually have adult conversations! Things were looking up. Then all of a sudden he thought he was getting fat and it was the shoot doing it so no more shot! Back to the pills again which I know he is not talking. And the other ones didn’t get stolen he traded them for pot, (he’s tried that trick too many times and cops and our great pharmacy are onto him) money and took the 2mg xanax like candy. I’m so afraid he is going to overdose or burn the house down or something of that nature. Thankfully he doesn’t have a car!! Why can’t the dr just leave the xanax and percocet off? I’ve told them what he is doing with them and that he doesn’t need them!!! But they just keep on. And with his suicide thoughts, jeez you’d think they would take that into consideration as well!! Sorry for the rant @slw
I don’t understand about the percocet, because where I live, so many people abuse them that it’s really hard to get them even if you really need them.
As for the xanax, I think my son’s old pdoc would work with him on some things, like valium, klonopin, adderall, that he probably shouldn’t have, but it was his way to keep him coming back for the AP’s, and to keep his trust. It worked, but this last time, he said it was finally time for my son to see an adult pdoc that knows more about adult drugs. (he’s seen this dr since he was 17, so pediatric pdoc that stuck by him).
I do know that my son was not taking any drugs the first time he had a psychotic break at 15 - they tested him & came up clean as a whistle. Since then, the prescription meds never helped him fully (partially his fault for not always being honest with the dr, partially mine for trying to let him have time to open up as long as he was functional and only had break-through symptoms) so he’s self-medicated with everything he could try.
He got hooked on painkillers, he’s taken every herbal supplement you can think of, he’s drank alcohol, he’s experimented with cutting, he’s tried to grow poppies, he’s tried poppy seed tea & mass quantities of nutmeg, you name it. And, I truly believe that the only reason that the only reason he’s not a heroin addict right now is that he’s too anxious to leave the house. And, he has no money or card to buy things off the dark web/silkroad - because he has looked.
To his credit, I sincerely believe it’s all in an attempt to feel like what the rest of the world feels normally. He’s desperate for help, but not willing to completely trust or give up control. He’s even said he thinks he’s SA at times, he’s recognized that he’s delusion & paranoid when he’s not totally psychotic, but he also says the APs don’t completely help, and his will slow his mind and leave him too desensitized to enjoy music or his art. And, the sad thing is that before the antipsychotics, he was a gifted artist and musician, and he’s lost some of his brightness.
He’s in the hospital right now, for the first time, and they’ve taken him off everything but the Zyprexa. He can’t even have smokes right now because he tried to escape & he’s on AWOL status. At least we’ll get to see what he’s like without any other drugs or alcohol for the first time in years.
As for burning down the house, I worry about that too. Our stove is electric, so not much to worry about there, but if he smokes, talk to him about an e-cig (no more burn holes in his clothes & he’ll smell better - that’s what did it for my son) or make sure his cigarettes have the kind of paper that puts the cigarette out if it’s left on its own too long. Surprisingly, they go out really fast if no one’s puffing on it.
Sorry for going on so long about my own situation, but I think the doctors have reasons for what they do that they don’t tell anyone - I speculate about it. I’m sure they know when their patients are not being truthful, but maybe, like us, they choose their battles or pick the lesser of the two evils sometimes.
The perkocet is for his so-called chronic pain that magically disappears when no one is looking! He does hoever have sever bruising from his right butt check to his inner thigh and behind kneecap and lower part of his calf. But had no recollection of how it happened. I just want to run away for awhile and drop him off with his dad and let him deal with him. But he’s another that doesn’t believe and thinks its all for show so I guess I’m just pissing in the wind on that one.
When my husband was seeing the pain management dr, he was lucky to get 1 hydrocodone per day, and he never tried to get a refill early. He gets nothing right now because he got tired of being treated like an addict & quit going. He just deals with it like he did for the 20 years before that.
My husband has thought our son was faking it to get drugs, or that something traumatic happened to him we don’t know about - like bullying or abuse, but he’s finally coming around. And, I have no idea what took him so long other than he didn’t want to see that his son had what is probably going to be a lifelong problem.
We have some things going on in my family too, but his mother tried to take her own life many times, and all her brothers and sisters have something going on, and my son’s only first cousin has the same kind of thing. If my husband was honest with himself, he’s got just a touch himself - maybe that’s why he can’t see it. Either way, it can take some men a long time to accept it. For us, it’s been 12 years. Part of the change is me though - I finally got to a point where I simply told him that this is what it is, and he could just stop trying to say it’s something else. He wasn’t helping the situation at all.