Life will never be the same. I’m sorry to say it. I went through what you are similar paranoia, hallucinations and such just three short LONG years ago with my husband. We have been now married 33 years, had just celebrated out 30th wedding anniversary, one of our five daughters had just gotten married and the other four were happily living with their significant others in their own homes. We were just becoming into our own relaxation after raising the five girls. I came home for lunch one day and my husband was home from work (VERY unusual for him) and telling me that he needed to call our oldest and tell her to clean her house because “someone” was accusing him of sexually assaulting her and DHHS was going to be coming to her house…then it was someone at work had told him that he was being hunted by the police…and on and on…Long story short, he tried to kill himself TWICE during the night…I found him the first time, watched him like a hawk (planning on taking him to his doctors as soon as they opened because of cost and because he seemed okay, had tried do himself in with car exhaust) while I was watching him, he was smoking almost continuously and I was keeping track of how long he was in the garage smoking and coming back in…never in my life did I think he would try and do it again and drink a quart of weed killer but he did. After everything…a good 2 weeks to get a handle on whatever was going on, he was diagnosed with SZ. He does go to work, thank God, but he is not the man I married, the man he was. He doesn’t/can’t(?) do the things he used to around the house. He isn’t the man who would cuddle, go for a drive to get an ice cream or just sit and have a conversation with me.
I don’t want to say your situation will be the same, I"m not trying to pop any bubbles, but I want you to be realistic …something that has hit me full in the face. it i hard as hell…Thank goodness he will take him medications…though I don’t give him the option either. Sometimes I see him peek out and take full joy when that happens. But his personality has changed, his behaviors have changed and his memory has changed. He will argue about stupid stuff, he will claim that I’m doing things or have done things that really haven’t happened and tells our daughters that stuff. I pray that you and she will be very blessed if she returns to her “old” self.
will she remember??? Good question…my husband had two episodes in his early 20’s that his family told me (NOR did he) about until this all happened in which he was also paranoid, in fact, he was actually placed in the mental hospital for a time. When I asked him why he never told me he informed me that his brother was lying, that the things that I was told never happened and he didn’t understand why his brother would say that. Then he said, “well I signed papers to go into the hospital so Pat (his brother) wouldn’t get mad at me.” I’m not really sure what he remembers or doesn’t remember. he to this day claims that he isn’t sick, that nothing happened even this last time and that it is MY fault that he spent time in the hospital and then the mental hospital, that I was just ‘over reacting’ to the situation (whatever one that he thinks was…no clue on this to this day) and that everything since then is my fault.
As to happening again…well from my experience yes…the severity will depend on how cognizant you are of her behaviors, her warning signs and such. I was able to stop my husband from a major issue by keeping in contact with his boss who told me things were off at work (he was arguing with his boss which is NOT in his norm as well as other things) and when he got home I saw other things…called the doctor and was able to get his meds increased, not without a lot of issues but at least I was able to keep him out of the hospital this time around. Likely, yes it will happen again, I’m sorry.
Just remember we are here, you have support and thank God this group has been here…things will be hard, things will never be the same, but the love I have for my husband will never change… I married him 33 years ago for better or worse…we always think worse is going to be a physical illness such as cancer, or Alzheimer’s or diabetes…but never one that we will have no clue what will happen, in what time period it will happen or WHEN …we just have to be continually prepared. No manuals on this illness/disease, just time, love and experience. Hang in there…we have all been in your shoes at one point or another so don’t be afraid to ask…yell, scream or cry…we’ve all done that too and still do! ((((HUGS)))