New to this site but in need for information/help. We raised my SD27 since she was 8 years old. Great kid, easy, sweet and listened. Mostly lol. Her mother has fragile x syndrome, which is linked for girls to schizophrenia. Her mother was delusional, hearing voices, was into drugs. She never held a job or a place to live and SD didn’t have a relationship with her much. We raised her, she graduated high school and moved out on her own.
As soon as she was on her own she started making bad life decisions. She moved herself across the country with no money and no job to go to and only one friend she knew and assumed they would be happy for her to stay there. They were for a bit, but she overstayed her welcome and when she wouldn’t leave things turned ugly. She then showed up back here and assumed the same here about friends and family.
She ended up finding a job and finding a place to live on her own. Then she started to change. She wouldn’t speak to her father, but would still speak to me. We had always had a close relationship and her and her dad butted heads since they were SO alike. She then stopped speaking to me also and started accusing everyone of abusing her. Everyone. I had calls from a friend of hers, a boy, who was upset because she threatened to call the police if he didn’t stop harassing her. He had asked her for a coffee.
She started to talk and act exactly as her mother did/does (we no longer have dealings with her). When I asked her to be in our wedding she laughed at me. Then we received a phone call that she was in the hospital, in lockdown and had been picked up downtown during the busiest time of day, walking around naked and chatting with people. It was very upsetting, but what we had been wishing for so she could finally get treatment. There were so many things in between that happened I can’t even put them all on paper. We then get a phone call that her family doctor released her. Soon after that, there’s a missing person report and the police are looking for her. They find her again, admit her to hospital again, and again her doctor releases her. This happens yet again.
Now, not even one month later I receive a call from the mental health counsellor that we have been working with trying to get her help and getting support for ourselves. SD27 had signed a consent for her to release her info to us. She is apparently on meds, is getting help and wants contact with us.
- It seems too soon. I’m scared she’s going to think everything is just great and we can just move on.
- I’m nervous she’s wanting to shit on her dad again since she seemed to get pleasure from it. He has PTSD from his job as a nurse and is still getting well himself.
- I don’t really know that I want a relationship with her anymore. She scares me. We keep our doors locked. She admitted to wanting to kill us to her counselor. She’s spread nasty rumors, said nasty things to my face and I don’t trust her and frankly do not want to be alone with her at any time, let alone have her in my house.
- I get that she is ill, but I’m unsure I can let everything slide. It doesn’t all just go away because she’s taking pills. How we feel and were treated and the destruction she caused doesn’t just go away because she is sick and has now decided that medication is an option after refusing it for years.
I’m lost. I feel sick. I just want to live a happy, peaceful life. I want her to as well.
Please be gentle, we both have enough guilt and anger to last a lifetime. Thank you in advance.