So sorry for all you are going through! Please know you are not alone in this and my prayers are with all involved!! God bless!
My sentiments exactly!!!
Thank you and I so agree with you in that sentiment. Hopefully he’ll get the help he needs.
Thank you, I know you are going through rough times too. I’ll pray for you also.
Update, me and his bio dad went to courthouse and signed papers to have him committed involuntarily. The judge signed and we took them to police station. Waited there till the CIT officer came and asked us if we wanted to be there or just let them go and pick him up, which is what we did. About 30 mins later they radioed in that they had him and the house was secure and they were headed to our local mental health facility. So we shall see what happens from here.
I’m at home now. Dogs and cats are all fed and happy and we are all in the bed. They are sleeping and I’m binge watching Scandle!!
Join me in prayer that they will give him the help he needs. Or if his heart is in a place where he doesn’t want to change, then I pray Jesus changes his heart!
Love and prayers to you all!
Both of our sons are in a safe place now. Let’s trust the professionals now and pray for their protection.
You’re welcome, I hope so too.
That’s great, I’m glad to hear the news!! How long are they going to keep him in there for?
No idea. But I’m going to go there tomorrow and try to speak with someone and let them know because I’m in fear for myself that he can’t come back home. Hopefully that will cause them to hold him longer. I also have a lot of pics and videos to show them!!
Has your son ever went in on an involuntary before?
Here, the patient has to have a hearing before the judge within a couple business days of the hold. Then, they almost always say 30 days, but it’s at the discretion of the hospital whether it’s really 30 days or not. If they want to hold him another 30 days, it’s another hearing. At some point, they can do a longer hold if they think he needs longer-term commitment.
The case manager called me after a few days and one of the questions they ask is whether or not he will be allowed to come home.
If he did not sign a release to let them talk to you, I don’t know what the communication will be like. My son wouldn’t sign one for a few days after his first hospitalization, and a few nurses would tell me a little bit, but I didn’t get much out of anyone else. My best point of contact was always his case worker in the hospital, and she seemed to be a some kind of therapist too.
My son’s first hold was 13 days - the second one was shorter because they started him on an injection. I don’t know what would have happened if I had said he couldn’t come home. They do have social service programs to help people with mental illness find supportive housing, but I’ve also heard stories where they just release them to the street.
Where we live, lots of people are released without housing. State hospital will even send people to homeless shelters as a discharge plan. The social workers will sometimes let you know, though, so you can decide.
That’s good, I’m glad you’re taking my advice. And that’s a great idea!! You can exaggerate a little bit if needed and even say he’s threatened to kill you and your (ex)-husband. One of the reasons that they kept my fiancé longer in the hospital is that he pretended that he had guns and threatened to kill everyone. He was violent, reactive, and defiant.
You are not going to believe this…after all we did today having him involuntarily committed, he was released tonight. He showed back up at the house and I called 911 telling them he was supposed to be committed. The dispatcher yelled back to the other people in the office asking if they knew anything about it and someone said “yeah, somebody tried to have him committed and he’s not crazy and there’s nothing she can do bc he lives there and there is no order of protection!” I was floored! I asked the dispatcher if someone just said he was not crazy and she said yes! I am so mad! They are not dr’s and had no right saying that to me! The CIT officers that came out yesterday told me that I did not need to be around him and to go have him inv committed. Which is what we did. But to no avail! Now I had to leave my house again and I have to go get an order of protection against him just to have him removed. The help we received for our son and myself was a joke!! I feel like the system is failing us and that if/when something bad happens nothing will be said about all the things that have been done to prevent it, all the talk will be about why wasn’t this prevented and the blame will land on my shoulders in the eyes of most!! I’m just at a loss!!
I’m so sorry that happened - and that they were that callous about your problems.
Did they give him any meds? a discharge plan? a diagnosis?
I thought that an involuntary hold had to be at least 72 hours everywhere so that they can observe the person.
It almost sounds like the hospital ignored the court order.
How was he?
That’s ridiculous. Make a complaint to the chief of the department, go to higher authorities if needed. Call the police again and have him take him back, keep calling and explain everything’s he’s done. Say you fear for your life and that he’s psychotic.
I know all states are different, but if you got the paperwork filled out for the police to pick him up & take him to the hospital, then your son should have to go to a hearing before they can release him.
That’s how it works here.
Someone gets the involuntary hold paperwork approved by the magistrate.
The police transport you to the hospital.
In a day or so, they have a hearing - they even give the patient an attorney.
At that time, the judge can let them go or say they should stay, I’m guessing that’s based on what the doctor says.
Then, the patient is given the option of saying they are willing to stay on a voluntary basis.
If they go with voluntary, they can ask to be released with a 24-hour notice. I’m assuming the 24-hour notice is so the treatment team can try to get another involuntary hold approved if they need it.
But, here, there’s no way to get out before that hearing happens, and sometimes the hearings run late into the evening.
I wonder if they got him a hearing that quickly, and exactly what the doctor had to say.
The good thing about guardianship is that if you had it, they’d have to share that information. Otherwise, your son would have to give them permission. I don’t have guardianship, but if I ran into the same problems you guys were having, I’d be getting it pretty quick.
This is a link to how it works in my state - that’s not my location, but it works the same way here.
For my son, the petitioner has always been a community board member.
Maybe you can find something similar to that where you live. I think if you want to use the system, it’s important to know exactly how it works. Then, if someone doesn’t follow the rules, you can call them on it.
Every state is different with different laws. And all judges, police, doctors, etc. interpret laws in different ways. The system fails many families.
You are doing all you can for the child you love so dearly. I hope you could find an advisor in your locality, a good social worker or legal professional, someone very experienced who knows the laws and the people where you live.
Well put. The stories here make me feel very thankful that things have worked in my son’s favor for the most part.
And, equally frustrated that they don’t work well for others.
The thing that gets me is that with all the tragedies that are clearly linked to untreated or undertreated mental illness in the news over the past few years people don’t take this kind of thing more seriously. It could quite literally be a life or death situation for the person with MI, their families or the public at large.
As mentioned, if something happens, they’d probably blame the family instead of everything and everyone that failed them when they tried to get help.
I feel the same way! No discharge plan or anything! I’m just sick!! He was not speaking to me when he broke in the house last night but seemed clear minded. And why should he be any different? After all he had just spent several hrs in the hospital, walked 15 miles home, cleaned all the mess up where he had destroyed the house and was out of scripts and illegal drugs. So of course he was “normal” to others! They hadn’t seen what had just transpired over the previous 24 hrs. I’m so over this!!
If he had to walk 15 miles home, and he really walked that far & no one gave him a ride, they must not have kept him in the hospital more than a couple hours. That’s amazing.
If you think drug abuse is a bigger issue than the mental illness, maybe it is time to walk away for a little bit if you can make it happen.