Went to visit my dad with paranoid SZ for the first time in a long time with my family. He recently had a stroke. So he’s stuck in his own body with his voices. After we left, he attempted suicide by slicing his throat with a kitchen knife. Mom (also mentally ill) called 911. All happened Dec 25th evening. Mom blames me for coming home. I honestly told her she is not thinking clearly if she’s blaming anyone for his attempt. Dad couldn’t say much to us and seemed frustrated while we were there. Obviously, he was unstable enough to attempt suicide.
I found out dec 26th morning with a text message from my dads brother. Called my mom, and got a lot of discrepancies. Called the hospital, he was okay but very unstable. Upped his Thorazine. Also on Prozac, zyprexa, and risperodone. Transferred from med surge to the psych unit today.
A lot to process through. My dad’s in so much pain.
I’m so sorry this happened to your father and you all. Of course it was not your “fault”. I’m glad that you can see that even if your mother can’t. I’m sending thoughts and prayers to your dad and to all of you. I know it must seem impossible right now, but I hope you can have some peace in the new year. Hugs.
My mom would have done the same thing. Whenever something happens she doesn’t like, she blames people or accuses them of making something worse. I am sorry your mom blamed you. You know its not true.
Glad your uncle texted you and glad the hospital would update you directly.
As a parent I would like to say to you what I would say to my own kids- even though I think you are there already, but just in case - don’t pick up dad’s pain. Don’t carry it, don’t let your children feel it or feel you feeling it. As parents we want more than anything to protect our children. I think your dad would want you to not be hurt any more by his illness.
So sorry for what you are going through. Hopefully, your dad will start to feel better once the meds fully kick in and he gets some rest. Then you can go visit him, or call to stay in touch with how he’s doing.
I wouldn’t pay too much attention to what your mom says right now. As you said, she’s mentally ill herself. The stress of all this is undoubtedly making her unravel a bit. Of course it’s not your fault!
I’m so sorry this happened and glad your father survived this attempt.
My grandmother blamed me for my mother’s death (self-inflicted). I’m glad you know that you did not cause your father’s medical illness and sad for your mother that she is unable to understand what is happening.
During this stressful time, I hope you are able to take care of yourself and be with people who take care of you. I know how much you were looking forward to seeing your father and how much you love him.
Praying that you feel as much peace and comfort as possible during this time.
I’m so sorry this happened. It is not your fault. I wish he knew how much you love him and the way you speak about him. I’m sure this is very hard to understand. I will pray for all of you. Big hugs!
I am so glad that you understand this, not everyone in the same situation would. It is still an awful lot to process though, along with it occurring at the holidays. My heart goes out to you.
I truly hope that your loved ones begin to improve in the New Year.
