My wife’s condition also seemed to get progressively worse as she had success in a creative field. My wife is genuinely an outstanding talent, and her illness has likely held her back from having success. However, I swiftly reached the conclusion that she needs to learn how to handle even very moderate success as it gets subtly out of hand. I think there is an aspect of all-or-nothing thinking where when she does get some attention, all of sudden all of her problems are going to be solved. Conversely when her brilliant work is not getting attention I am faced with “nobody cares about my work” even though she is doing absolutely nothing to get it any attention. It is an extremely frustrating way of thinking. It can dominate your everyday life, and create a climate of nothing ever being finished, and there always being a pressure on. The day is never done.
People frown upon recording things, but there is no question that me recording any conversation where I thought there was a risk of an outburst or a future contrary allegation was wise. It meant I could go to a doctor that had been ignoring me raising the alarm and say “Listen to that, is that normal? Am I meant to put up with that and be called an abuser on top of it all?” You must protect yourself, even for your own sanity. I have gone back to conversations I have had with my wife where I have started to believe I started the argument, and then I go back and see not only did I not start it, but I was not even arguing.
your wife and my wife are very similar in that aspect it sounds like, she is very identical with success, even in her job she was very successful but any time a mistake was pointed out or any criticism from her boss led her to immediately believing she was being fired or targeted and that she would need another job.
she also has developed a tendency to claim medical conditions if someone nearby mentions one or more that they may have she will claim she has or has had those conditions as well
she really began with pregnancy claims the last few years even though her tubes are tied and have been since 2008 , part of the falling out during when her psychosis began was her claiming she was pregnant , she laid in our bathtub daily claiming she was having a miscarriage , i made multiple attempts to bring her to a doctor which she adamantly refused , and after 3 weeks of it became frustrated with her not seeking help and told her that if shes not going to seek help and would rather continue to force me to watch her suffer i wasn’t going to entertain it any longer and suddenly a few days later she “claims” she passed twins and was fine.
i once again recommended medical care and she refused. that was when the psychosis started to really get bad she claims my lack of empathy thru that is what led to her wanting divorce, after speaking with my daughter after she left i found out she was fine during the day but when it was close to time for me to get home she would run into the bathroom and claim she had been in the tub all day in pain.
before her diagnosis was confirmed during an argument after she had left i told her i no longer believed she had a miscarriage and that she had been faking for attention or to pick a fight and that was 6 months ago and she still gets very angry when she brings up to me because i told her i had my doubts and she claims she was abused due to that as well.
her family and i have discussed that when she is not given the empathy she seeks when claiming medical issues she claims abuse and she has always been abused etc.
she started to claim she didn’t want her tubes tied in 08 and the doctor did it without her permission but she actually had to jump thru a lot of hoops to get it done because the doctor was hesitant to do it at the time due to her being so young but after the complications she had throughout he agreed and she had multiple arguments with her parents over it as well.
i had mentioned that one day to her and she got angry and began telling my daughter i had them do it without her permission while she was asleep after giving birth and i told my daughter we weren’t married at the time and i had no power of attorney and no legal so say over anything so that obviously wasn’t true as well.