Do they come back?

Family
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my wife of 19 years was recently diagnosed with schizophrenia/paronoia

we had a great marriage very little issues , we were best friends never spent more than a night apart in 19 years
one day back in march of this year 2024 a switch flipped and i didnt know who she was , she wanted a divorce out of now where , claimed she hadnt loved me in 5 years then 8 years then 10 years etc. she claimed buddha and anubis was talking to her telling she would die soon and she needed to be more selfish etc. tried to get her help and she took off to her parents.
several months passed of mean , hateful insults , neglecting our 16 year old daughter , we go 3 weeks without hearing a peep from her finally we get word she was committed for 10 days
i was livid no one told us but her parents finally believed me and opened up discussions.
we went to visit and she was worse than when she left claiming she was being sex traffiked by her family and the green berets were watching her. she had tried to walk into the neighbors house claiming it was her and her imaginary b/f’s safe house cause they were witness protection and federal agents.
she was now an ordained minister and had our marriage annulled as well
police showed up and she wrote her statement in Japanese.
that is what got her committed the first time.
fast forward to the 1st of this month after refusing her meds immediatly claiming it was poison she sat her family down and told them she was a sociapath and she has their murders plotted and she needs help and she called 911 on herself.
she was committed again and began to accept treatment. after a week or so her mother asked me to contact the social worker which i did and she gave him permission to speak with me and that they were having a confrence call the next day and i was given permission to be on it as well.
I told the SW i was a little shocked she agreed to that because she hates me due to her delusion’s he said i dont think she hates you at all and based on what i know you guys had a great marrage up until a few months back when this started and i said yea it was like a switch flipped and i love her so much and i kinda broke into some tears.
he said with meds and therapy this is fixable and shes doing really well.
so i told him id be there
next day she rejected me to be on the call so i was removed prior to starting.
her mother called me afterwords sounding distressed saying shes still delusional and shes saying she had a whole diff family and that she needed to care for those kids she has and she wants to be on her own etc. shes gonna recover and wants be on her own and away from everyone.
we both told the SW she didnt need to be released and he had already consulted with her doctors and they said it will take time for he meds to take full affect and she will have some lingering things as it gets in her system.
my daughter and i went to see her the next day and she seemed like she was starting to be her old self but not really close yet.
i brought her a prepaid phone so we could communicate and she was grateful i told her i would start having groceries delivered to help her and she seemed grateful but said i didnt have to.
i said i want to because i love you and she looked down almost in shame and shortly after she said she was nauseated and wanted to lay down so we left to let her rest.
shes spoken with me thru text the past two days just one or two sentence responses and thanked me for the phone and said id only have to pay for a month and she would have a job.
i guess i was expecting her to be discharged and back to reality and ready to take back her life and i was wrong it was a pretty deflating for myself and my daughter.
guess we are just ready to have her home and the uncertain future of everything is stressful

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I am so sorry, you and your family and your wife’s family must be under a good deal of stress.

I hope I can help with some questions, if you don’t mind?

Is there a history of severe mental illness in your wife’s family? Have they disclosed anything of this nature from her past? Families often have no idea that they have severe mental illness in their family history. Sometimes the information has been deeply buried and sometimes no one even realized - schizophrenia is a spectrum disorder - symptoms can range from mild to severe.

Was a complete physical work up done that included a neurologist? Brain tumors can cause similar issues. One of my friends’ mothers was diagnosed with a brain disease after several years of personality changes that grew increasingly worse.

Do they come back? This answer varies, I wish I could tell you that she “comes back” and life returns to its previous status. What I can tell you is that she is still there and is having to deal with a reality that we can’t even begin to imagine.

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Thank you for responding

Her mother told me that one her sister in laws was diagnosed with schizophrenia. So genetics could be a possibility.

She (my wife) has tried to keep me and her family in the dark about a lot of this when it started so information has been sporadic and spotty on some of it as far as treatment has gone with scans and MRI’s she actually signed a non consent to release any info when she was first admitted to any of us her mom included.

I do know about 6 months prior to the full on psychosis she acted like she was having a heat stroke I rushed her to the hospital and after 6-8 hrs of numerous MRI’s and several follow up MRI’s with contrast over the next month or two
No sign of stroke or brain tumors were found.

My daughter and were discussing recently and looking back to around that time she would randomly get “sick” when she didn’t wish to attend social events or leave the home and would make a instant recovery if the event was canceled or we would decide not to go.
And my daughter also said she would be fine on most days throughout the day and right as it would get close to time for me to get home from work she would get “sick”
Also if I wouldn’t comfort her more than asking if she was ok or needed anything or if she would like to go to the doctor she would complain the next day of me being un-empathetic towards her.

She also began taking delta 8 cbd products from smoke shops and gas stations claiming it helped her with her pain from chrons. She acted a lot like she did in psychosis when she was on it and I asked her multiple times to stop taking it and if she wanted to get a prescription for medical cannabis we would go that route but she never did I also feel that could have contributed to her psychosis.

She also around the time of the “stroke” until she went into full psychosis she was really pushing pregnancy claiming she was pregnant (her tubes are tied since 2008)
We even went to a obgyn to have an ultrasound and no pregnancy whatsoever was found and that was one of my first signs I didn’t pickup on that something was wrong. She flipped out in the doctor and nurses when they told her she wasn’t pregnant and as long as I’ve known her she’s never been that way at all I was taken back by it at the time and it took me a few days of convincing to get her to understand she wasn’t pregnant and it would come up every few weeks she was pregnant again.
Actually during the time the psychosis started she kept saying she was miscarrying and she would stay in our bathtub for hours daily claiming it felt like she was giving birth and I kept trying to get her to a doctor and she refused. After 2-3 weeks I got frustrated and told her if she wasn’t going to let me help her I don’t know what to do but I can’t continue to sit here and watch her torture herself like this.
Also she was laid off from her job of 7 years(she worked remotely at home) and our oldest daughter had been involuntary committed for stalking her ex b/f all within the 2-3 week time span of her claiming to give birth and the night she claimed she passed it was the night the switch flipped on me. And the divorce talk and the delusions and hallucinating was spoken of to me.

I found out shortly after she left she had been telling my daughter a “spirit guide” was telling her I was having an affair.
That she claimed ferry’s with fangs were flying around our house at night
My daughter has a spirit portal in her room
That she used her magical healing powers to save me in a motorcycle accident that I did really have in 2015
And that she believed I was possessed by a demon at one point as well.

she is on the tablet version of invega 9mg i believe as far as meds

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Many of our family members can be quite functional. Schizophrenia is cyclical, people have described family members that would have episodes on a less frequent basis which is quite different from our family members who suffer constant psychosis.

Normalizing can play a big role in schizophrenia going unrecognized, sometimes for years, sometimes forever. Symptoms can be suppressed and, often, the behaviors that aren’t actually “normal” are categorized as normal by the rest of the family.

My husband’s brothers would both tell you that their mom didn’t have schizophrenia. All of her symptoms have been normalized by the sentence “that’s just Mom”. She heard voices, and like my son, the voices she heard were attributed to the people around her. I thought she just liked making stuff up when she would say people had said things that had not been said.

Our family members are sensitive to stress. Stress can cause psychosis. Keeping the life of someone with scz stress free is not easy. Your wife had a lot of stress issues enter her life in a short period of time.

One of the struggles is understanding that their reality is as real as ours.

Good to hear you have had neurological issues ruled out.

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Yea and when it started happening in the middle of stress I had a feeling it was something psychotic due to it and I tried to talk to her and there was no getting thru I hadn’t learned yet that it’s easier to baptize a cat than it is to talk someone out of a delusion.
It was shocking to me how fast it had happened

I try to text her every morning something positive

“ good morning I hope you have a great day and I hope your feeling well”

“ Good morning I just wanted to tell you that your a great person and a great mother and I hope your doing well and I hope you have a good day
I am here if you need me” even if you just need someone to listen and not say anything just be heard”

Sometimes I get a thanks or no response at all but I’m thinking that’s just her being withdrawn while adjusting to the meds

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And to make it more difficult, the more you try to talk someone out of a delusion, the separation between the two of you grows wider and you can make them quite paranoid of you.

Sounds like you are reaching out regularly in a positive manner. Read up on Dr Amador’s LEAP method of communicating with people in psychosis. Focus on just the first two letters, Listen and Empathize to start out.

Some people get uncomfortable and feel they are confirming delusions using LEAP. If she is pressing you for confirmation on a delusion and just empathizing with the emotion doesn’t work and you are getting uncomfortable, you can always use the A - and agree to disagree in a calm soothing manner.

Listening and Empathizing will build trust. The conversation techniques aren’t just for crucial moments, they are for every moment.

Everyone’s recovery varies, but there is always a chance for recovery.

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I never even heard of LEAP until I came here. I never knew about all the tools etc for dealing with psychotic people. All I did was put out fires, while Billy started more.

I not only felt ridiculously stupid listening to Billy’s delusional rantings for even one second, I also thought that it was very damaging to even give them the slightest consideration. I did not in any way, shape, or form, want to confirm Billy’s delusions. I thought it would only encourage him.

And who was there to explain to me a constructive way of dealing with this constant and very distressing psychotic ranting and screaming? Nobody. And I did not see an upside.

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yea i just finished Dr Amadors book ,
it made me take a step back to my mom in law telling me that she was really pushy about being left alone and doing her treatment by herself and being independent so the next time i offered her help i asked if i could help and told her that it would mean more to me to help her and that she would be doing me a favor by allowing me to help and she seemed a lot more receptive.

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Exactly, we all end up having to do extensive research to gain knowledge and then we have to figure out which parts apply to our family members. So much research and still it’s all trial and error as we apply the information. Nobody drops by with your “welcome to schizophrenia” basket full of information. Many years ago I was fortunate that when I was telling a new friend about a recent odd behavior of my son’s, she referred me to NAMI as a source of information.

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Good, already some positive results.

I did call my Family to Family instructor and asked her for some guidance on your situation. She is concerned that some of your positive comments may be putting more pressure on your wife. In particular - “hope you have a great day - hope you are feeling well - you are a great person and mother”.

She says those statements could feel like pressure and could be stressing out your wife. She suggests texts like a picture of a flower or a picture of something you know your wife enjoys. She says to be really careful about memes as your wife is experiencing some paranoia. Even a simple lol or haha can be taken as ridicule. She said to try to follow your wife’s lead and to remember to avoid any triggers that you are aware of - if none are known try to figure them out.

When I wanted to stop texting my son altogether, people here objected and said I should continue to reach out. I stopped texting him regularly, but I did text him brief “business” type texts, stuff he needed to know but didn’t require a response. “Your SNAP amount changed” stuff that didn’t require an answer. If I hadn’t heard from him in a while I would send a question. “Should I send more flea topical for your cat?” Such texts did leave the door open for him to contact me.

Triggers tend to be consistent, that helps. If my son was sleeping and there was a loud noise - that would trigger psychosis. A glimpse of his dad could trigger a full psychotic episode.

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Most of the research I’ve done was after Billy died. I was too busy before to spend a lot of time doing research about mental illness. And all the time I was dealing with doctors, social workers, etc none of them worth a damn.

One of the things I’ve learned is that the symptoms of various mental disorders are practically the same; it is sometimes very subtle distinctions that separate schizophrenia from other diagnoses. I realized the reason they all have the same symptoms because all of these symptoms displayed are various defense mechanisms of the mind. Hallucinations, delusions, catatonia, disassociation, etc are defense mechanisms we all possess, and hopefully never experience. And if we do, it doesn’t necessarily mean we’re crazy; there are specific criteria for diagnosis (relating to frequency and duration of symptoms among other things).

For example, I had a three legged cat. When she walked on the wooden floor, she made a distinctive thump thump thump that no other cat would make. I had her for 20 years and when she passed, I was severely bereaved. Every day for weeks, I heard that thump thump thump in the hallway. I knew it wasn’t real and it made me fell so much worse. But, it didn’t mean I was crazy; hallucination from bereavement is quite common.

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How to have time to research how to put out fires when you are in the middle of a fire?

I have heard that hallucinations after bereavement are quite common and can be quite extensive - people sometimes hold long conversations with their hallucinations.

I thought that might be interesting- if I was to have such an experience after Mike died, so far I haven’t. A few dreams where he was younger, but nothing vivid or current.

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thank you for taking the time to reach out to your family to family instructor for me that was really kind of you and i appreciate it a lot

i didnt think about it coming off as pressure that is a really good point. i was sending her some family pictures thinking she may want them but she never responded i wonder if that may have been a trigger ? she did respond to me this morning with im doing well thank you and you have a good day too.
i know my daughter reached out to her and asked her if she would like to come home for a few days and spend time with her and she responded saying she starts therapy today and she has to stay in the town her parents live in.
so i feel like thats progress vs a flat out no like i would have expected

Im thinking my telling her i love her may be a trigger because she almost held her head in shame and wouldnt look at me when i said it.
my daughter said it looked to her almost like she felt guilty like maybe shes coming to reality and realizes some of things shes done and said seeing how much i care even after all of that may have made her feel even more shameful
my daughter is really smart so i give her credit with that observation. i thought about sending her some pictures from vacations weve had to see if that makes her feel better but i was afraid of that triggering her

i know when she was in psychosis and attacking me pretty hard (before we knew for sure she was in psychosis)

she got really upset when i told her she needs stop and think about the consequences and what she is doing and the pain shes causiing and the regrets he will have later mostly with the divorce

she angrily shouted that she doesnt want to feel bad or hear anything that will make her second guess her decsions and i said exactly because you know deep down inside you dont want this and its a huge mistake and she started crying and said to leave her alone about it so i backed off.
luckily our state wont grant a divorce without a year of separation with minor children , march would be a year but i am not filing and i know she doesnt have the money or means to file and it would still have to wait until march
one of her ironclad delusions right now is we are already divorced because she had it anulled thru the church which first off we didnt get married in a church and secondly the divorce laws in our state wont allow it.
which im thinking it could be starting to break because when her social worker spoke to me during the in patient process he said that based on what he was told that we had a great marriage and the only problems we had came from the events of the last 9 months and he feels its completely fixable as long as she stays on her meds and follows treatment which makes me have to guess she brought it up to him or her doctor in some capacity when she was clear.
my mom in law said he was a bit taken back on the call when she went into i had the marriage anulled story again and he later told my mother in law he was texting her medical team as the call was going on that maybe her release should be re-evaluated

she kept going on about this other family she had with kids etc. and how she needed to get back to them because they needed her etc. and i wonder if thats part of her clarity saying she needs to get back to her family but the delusion just twisting it up ?

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I sometimes also wonder whether too many upbeat messages and inquiries about our loved ones’ state of mind aren’t counterproductive. I recall Maggotbrane saying that too much loving language or positivity can backfire and create stress and pressure, as the FtF instructor mentioned.

Maggotbrane suggested that trust and credibility come more from action than words - which most of our loved ones tend to interpret with some skepticism, or even in a totally different way than we mean. The last thing we want for our loved ones is to feel inadequate and failures, and it’s sadly ironic that too much positivity can suggest exactly that.

Just think of how even those of us without MI find the hackneyed “how are you” to be more a social custom than genuine concern about our state of mind. There are many ways to stay in touch, and sometimes the. best thing you can do for someone suffering is just show up, and let them know you are there to listen if they feel like talking, whether in person or by other means.

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i changed my tactics a bit over the weekend , i sent a few videos of nothing upsetting just some light humor and got no response, we did speak a little on the fish aquarium i got my daughter for Christmas.
i sent her a meme last night before bed just saying that i promised a long time ago id be here for her and i intend to keep that promise.

not really sure how shes receiving we are supposed to go see her for christmas this week i did buy her a few gifts of things i know she enjoys she has been more talkative since shes gotten treatment but shes still having a semi dry attitude towards myself and shes spotty with our daughter like she was when the psychosis started my daughter is getting a little frustrated that she has to reach out first to get any engagement from her, i keep reminding her that her mom is in recovery and that this will be a slow process. i know shes still just a kid and its not easy for her so its been a balancing act trying to keep that together as well.

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We went to see her for Christmas yesterday, and it was pretty rough. It started out semi-decent and had some engaging conversation about her treatment. She seemed really involved about getting better and was saying she felt she may need more hospitalization, and she was okay with that, and she was very happy about some gifts we brought. As the day wound down and we were going to leave, I asked her if she would be ok with her and I talking in private, and she agreed. I began by saying that I have been trying to be careful about what I say for fear of triggering her, and I have spent a lot of time learning as much as I could about her disorder, and that I will probably never know exactly what she went through, but based on what I had learned from other people’s experiences, it’s not easy, and I am so sorry that she had to go through that, and it’s not her fault, and I don’t think any less of her, and I only want to see her overcome this, and whatever I could do to support her, I would be here for her. She thanked me and told me she appreciated it, and then immediately proceeded to tear into me. She told me I didn’t have to do any of that because we weren’t together, and she wasn’t my problem, and I needed to stop expecting her to come home eventually. She blamed her family and me for causing her schizophrenia; she claimed I abused her and beat her our whole marriage (which is not even remotely true); she claimed I got blackout drunk and did it so I wouldn’t remember it (very untrue as well); she claimed her family had her trapped at their home and she was being abused and she couldn’t leave (untrue); she claimed our daughter had abused her as well (untrue and really made me angry); she said she was tired of facing her abusers all the time and she wanted to recover and get out of that house and live by herself and not have to be around anyone. I was really shocked, but I didn’t attempt to disprove anything or get upset. I remained calm and simply told her, "I’m sorry you feel that way, and I’m sorry that you feel like that happened. I told her I didn’t expect her to come home, but I did leave the door open and a path for her to regain her life if she chose. That’s all. She kept going on about being abused and stuck at her parents’ and couldn’t leave, and she was being held hostage, and I said you can leave anytime you want. I offered her to come home for a few days just to have a break from everything and spend some time with her daughter and to just have a change of pace. She said she couldn’t because the terms of her therapy said she has to stay in the home she attempted to self-harm in, so I left it alone at that point, and I said I’m very sorry for everything you have gone through, and I am sorry, but I disagree with some of what you said, but I also understand that’s how you feel, and I’m sorry you feel that way. I just wanted you to know that I do understand some of what you have gone through. I promised you a long time ago I would always be here for you, and I keep my promises. She said maybe after this month her therapist may “allow” her to come stay a few days and see how it goes. I said, Ok, well, you let me know what your terms and boundaries are, and I will do whatever I need to accommodate you. I stood up and said, I know you don’t want to hear it, but I love you, and if you ever decide you want to take your life back, I will leave the door open for that, and I am here if you need anything, and I walked out. I spoke with her mother afterwards, and she was kind of shocked she had said all of that because she knew she was taking her meds, but she hadn’t been going to therapy because there was confusion, and she was set up to go in group during release, and she wasn’t comfortable with being in group. She said she claimed to be speaking with this counselor that she spoke with back in March that was through my work, but I know that counselor is not a psychotherapist. I’m not really sure what to think or where to go at this point. She’s apparently very delusional still, and I’m afraid she may be on another dead end in treatment.

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My wife is currently cycling through adoring and hating me, to the point she is now living on another continent. There is one saving grace for you in this situation, and that is that anybody that encounters your wife will clearly see that she is unwell as she is talking gibberish. If she was flying under the radar this could be a lot more difficult in terms of getting her to help, and you may find that her claims of abuse against you may have been taken seriously. One thing I would advise you, if you have a good day with her, don’t rock the boat unless you have to. If you walk away with a good day in her mind, it might help you down the line. But this is likely to be a long road. Join the club of us with spouses who suddenly turn on us. But we will get our voice and we will be heard.

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Thank you low profile I actually was following your story a few days ago I found it while searching threads to see how many other people have experienced the same thing to find any piece of advice I could. I am very sorry for your situation my wife is only an hour from me right now I can’t imagine the stress of your wife being on a different continent.
I really hope the best for you. I wouldn’t wish this type of stress on my worse enemy.

She’s not good at hiding it at all she goes right into it almost immediately when she’s around people. Her family is watching her closely and we all agree she shouldn’t have been released as early as she was she even feels like she should be back in the hospital which is surprising she pretty much openly says she wants to go back which is a new twist but I’m glad she feels that way.
Her eyes is what gets me I can just see them almost glaze over when that switch flips and I know it’s coming.

What’s really odd and I almost forgot about it and my daughter reminded me of it when I got home from work about 7-8 years ago we were on a roadtrip and my wife was talking about schizophrenia and bipolar running in her family and she asked me to promise her if she ever showed signs of it to get her help even if she refuses it and if she turns on me and says she doesn’t want anything to do with me to plz not turn my back on her or give up on her. And I totally forgot about that. And it was really odd that my daughter remembered that today and mentioned it to me. According to her family she’s never had an episode and this is all brand new. Unless she’s experienced it thru a family member and saw it play out I’m not sure.

I did send her a voice message thru text today using the leap method
I started off apologizing if I had upset her and I told her that I had listened to every thing she said yesterday and I wanted to take some extra time to really make sure I heard and understood what she had said and that I would speak to some of things she mentioned because I wanted her to know that she’s heard and understood.
I empathized with her on her claims of abuse from her family and being held hostage I never reinforced it I just empathized with how she felt.
I said as far your claims to my abuse I’ve you I have a different experience of that but something made you feel that way and I understand that and I’m sorry you feel that way and left it at that.

I let her know I had no expectations from her or anything like and I felt like she feared my help and involvement meant that I had some expectations for doing that and that I understood why she could feel that way and I empathized with her on it.

I brought up her prediction and told her I made her a promise and that she knows my promises are something that mean a lot to me and that it means a lot to me to follow thru

She asked me why it took her leaving to make changes
I simply told her because I didn’t know how to listen the way she needed me to and that it took me a long time to figure that out and I’m sorry for that and I ended with take care of yourself and I’m always here if you need me.

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With my wife, the eyes give it away too. She looks at me and she doesn’t even have to say anything. I can see her thinking “what are you doing in my life you absolute waste of space?” or words to that effect. Of course others will struggle to see it, but it is those closest to her that get the treatment. With others an act comes on, until she can not contain the illness anymore and things start happening. The last time she was in the hospital and came round and had clarity she was saying that she did not understand why she could not see it coming. I was trying to explain to her that I think the scope of her illness is much further than she understands. She thinks the falling out with me is just her not wanting to be with me, but every time it happens it looks like it is part of a continuum where she is getting sicker and sicker. She can appreciate doing outlandishly crazy stuff is illness, but she can not see the becoming disagreeable, or emotionally dysregulated is part of the prodromal stage of the illness.

It is very interesting that she had that fear of developing a severe mental illness due to her family history. Not many people know that David Bowie had the very same fear due to aunts who had ended up sick and his older brother Terry, who was institutionalized for a very long time and sadly did not make it. Bowie wrote a couple of songs about it (‘All the Madmen’ and ‘Jump they Say’). It seems crazy that Bowie did not end up institutionally given how much he abused his brain.

The problem with LEAP is when they are making allegations against you. You do have to be careful and never say you have done something you have not, as they could be recording you and use it as evidence.

This might be a random question, but did your wife have any bought of illness like a cold or infection or covid or anything like that around the time she got unwell?

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your wife and my wife are very similar in how she treats people closest to her, she seems to be doing the same thing in that aspect.

as far as illness prior to all of this she really didnt have any virus that i could tell of , i know a lot of stressful things did happen all at once when this all started which leads me to believe that may have triggered her psychosis , she had been laid off from her remote job from home of 7 years , her oldest daughter (my stepdaughter) was committed for the second time for stalking her ex b/f, My mother in law nearly had a heart attack , and i had a wage garnishment for an old credit card that defaulted during covid i had forgotton about but i had borrowed against my 401k and paid off when the psychoisis began.
she had started a podcast about a year prior to this and she was doing ok with it , i was also pumping her downloads by creating random emails every few days and subscribing and streaming it on mute in the background on my work computer daily.
right as all this began she was showing a lot of delusions of grandeur , claiming she no longer needed a job because she was gonna be a millionaire from her podcast which my therapist told me to immediately stop any kind of number pumping because i would be reinforcing that delusion so i stopped and her numbers dropped from a few hundred downloads a week to 7-8 a month after a month or two she quit the podcast and removed anything related to it from everywhere.

i went over there yesterday since our oldest daughter was in town for a vist and she wanted to see my youngest daughter before she left and i avoided any contact with my wife just give space (she never came out of her room)
i found out shortly after leaving she was very unhappy our oldest daughter was staying more than a day or two and wanted her to leave that day.
and she had told our oldest daughter that i had threatened to kill her on Christmas if she didn’t come home. and that i tricked her into signing papers saying she wasn’t allowed to contact our youngest daughter which was completely untrue and really shocked me and I’m still pretty un nerved about which has started to make me wonder how much more of this can i tolerate before i have had enough.
i guess for now i will be recording our conversations anytime her and i are alone to protect myself in case she tries to say something else just for my protection. the only mention of her coming home that day was she kept saying im expecting it and i said no im letting you know the option is there and if you did want to come home and i have things in place to make sure her treatment was uninterrupted and that i was able to get her another vehicle etc. and she would be taken care of and i would do as much as i could to accommodate her.