Has anyone else experienced paranoid false accusations by their schizophrenic child? What is the best way to handle the situation when they appear to the lay public as sounding very normal. We would appreciate some guidance. Thank you. We have just joined the site.
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I have a feeling there will be a lot of responses to this one. Iāve been told I was a terrible mother and that I abused my son by making him stay in his room all the time and FORCED him to play baseball (through varsity - and he was good). These accusations were more of the early stages of his psychosis as he doesnāt talk to me much these days. When he lived with his father (over a year ago) he told him I had been poisoning him.
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Hi. Welcome.
Iām not sure what kinds of accusations youāre talking about, but there are many threads you can search for on this site that have to do with anything from food poisoning to sexual assault. Just search for the type of accusation youāre experiencing. I assure you, youāre not alone.
Weāve been accused of the worst of the worst, and then some. Unfortunately for us, it still happens, even after many months of steady medication.
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I too would be interested in what kind of accusations, because depending on the type there could be a different response or reaction for each. When my son was very ill he accused me constantly of talking behind his back and holding him prisoner against his will, even though he had a key to the door and could come and go as he pleased. I would just say very calmly that I was sorry he felt that way but I disagreed.
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My son has accused us, his parents, of sexual abuse as a child. He tells people we beat him as a child. He says his dad tried to turn him into a nazi. We forced him to support us and pay all the bills when he lived at home (even though he never kept a job). He had to pay for all of our family vacations. I could go on and on. My son is 31 and doesnāt take medicine. We love him so much and have to tell each other that it is the illness.
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Welcome falselyaccused,
My sonās paranoid false accusations really ramped up the past year. He began reaching out to family members he had not seen in years asking them to intervene on his behalf. We think the sexual abuse accusations started when someone began harassing him in an online computer game. His paranoia which has focused on his dad in the past, began focusing on both of us, he thought we were the online harasser. He is convinced we were sexually abusing him online.
Before the sexual abuse accusations started, he usually just blamed us for yelling ugly things at him. He hears voices yelling names at him and deluded they were us. He claims that he reported us to RAIN twice. One night he called 911 so many times to report us sexually abusing him through this computer, that the sheriffās office called me at 1am and asked me to get him to stop calling 911.
I did the Amador response stuff for a long time. Finally I stopped using it when the texted rants would come in. I would ignore the accusations and just respond to the texts that werenāt accusing me.
He also would stand on his porch and yell our full names as loud as he could informing the neighbors we were sexually abusing him. I didnāt respond on these occasions. The neighbors know he has brain damage.
I did take screen shots of the accusation texts and kept records of the dates when he called 911. I included faxed copies of the screen shots to his psychiatrist to keep him in the loop.
Has your child been diagnosed?
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Iām a member of this club. It comes and goes. If its a good day, I might say, Iām sorry you feel that way, or try to change the topic to something pleasant; otherwise I do my best to keep from responding at all.
I donāt know if my son says these things to other people. He tends to keep his psychosis under wraps when we go out. It sometimes seeps out as surliness or insults in public, but nothing too horrible anymore.
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The false accusations from our family member were during times with lots of symptoms and almost were not accusations since they were so bizarre in nature.
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Hi, when my son was psychotic, before he was diagnosed and medicated, he accused me of all kinds of things, such as I am not his real mother, I am the worst mother ever, and he always said I am stealing his dreams. Many more I am sure, but canāt remember. Since he has been medicated he never does it.
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If we could go back in time, I wish we hadnāt responded with so much attention to sexual assault accusations that our son made during his first major psychotic episode.
The accusations werenāt directed towards us, his parents, but the person who was the target? Let me just say I will eternally feel guilt for his pain. He was just an innocent bystander, a friend.
Unfortunately the accusation involved police, detectives, etc. We had no idea the accusation was related to a developing mental illness.
With all of these players involved (us, other family, his friends, police and other officials, etc.), and uncertainty as to whether the accusation was actually true, too much attention was paid. The delusion was set in stone.
My advice? Donāt respond, or give as little attention as possible.
Edit: As anyone on this forum can probably imagine, the aforementioned delusion morphed into something much bigger. Our son now lives in constant fear.
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I found myself wondering today about two claims my son had made about sexual advances. He had told me that a boss had made advances at him years ago. He said he quit his job because of it. Also, several years after that, he accused a security guard at work of āfeeling him upā during a routine pat down search. My son had to access a secure area during his work and pat downs were required. The guard got in trouble. Now I wonder.
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Yes. Iād wonder too, Hope.
Our son thinks anyone and everyone is a threat to his personal safety.
You canāt be sure, but you can probably conclude the reports your son gave were illness-based.
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I think you are correct.
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Thank you, seriously.
Iāve been devastated and reeling for days!
Hurt, mostly, that my son is living with what he believes to be TRUTH.
He believes that l beat him.
He thinks l hit him!
l never, ever would hit my children!
EVER !!!
He said he will not speak to me again until l get counseling and admit what l have done.
Guilty until proven innocent?
Iām dumbfounded. Speechless.
Heartbrokenā¦
My daughter happened to be here when his call came in.
Now, l need to try to help her to forgive him and still remain his pal.
He said that l got so good at beating him , so āsmartā, that l knew to only hit him in areas that were covered by his clothing.
Iām SICK over this.
In thatā¦ my partner found this forumā¦
This helps tremendously !
Not that l would wish this on anyoneā¦
Itās just good to have someone to connect with about this insanity.
Thank you!
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Iām glad you found the forum @lacey
It is heartbreaking because they believe their delusions are real. How awful it is for them as well as us. So much real pain can come from delusions.
My brother has autism learning disbility challenging behaviour and schizophrenia. He is in supported living. Has said I force him to smoke also I forced to quit smoking. To eat food. I heard him mumble staff force him to drink coke as he pour staff drink and drank it. There is a report saying I forced him to eat food. Quit Smoking Then states he lies in a report. The staff have no experience of working with adults with these conditions. The latest care provider has relentlessly bullied me. I try going to doctors about it. But they believe what is written.
When in fact was pervious care providers who stopped him smoking.
I am so upset as my other brother has schizoaffective disorder and he also says things not true. Eg. A friendās five year old child is disturbed.
Itās their delusions hallucinations maybe something else . Paranoia
He told me a man go in his room at night hit him around the head. When he was in place far away.
He even said in front of manager her staff member Mosses when to hit him.
I couldnāt endure the bullying from staff I lost weight.
But nobody believes me. So itās hard as I had staff screaming a me he need to be put in prison put in a lock up. Families have to endure enough with family members with these illnesses.