I’m sorry everyone I’m just so incredibly distraught at the moment. I’m his proxy he’s inpatient but he really believes his anger and explosive behavior is all my fault and he called me to break off our marriage
I know the anger is fueled by psychosis but what if we can’t convince him to take his meds he will leave me bc of this delusion I am sick to my stomach with anxiety and fear and stress and heartbreak
I’d care for him forever if he would just stay on his meds but off them his anger is too intense.
I’m just so lonely and sad I feel unloved like trash and I miss my darling love
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He used to be the sweetest man alive just an absolute angel
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@LoyalJazzy You sound like such a loving and compassionate person and I know from experience that all of the hateful rejection you are experiencing from your husband is a sad symptom of his illness-nearly all of us here on this forum have experienced it in one form or another. It is so incredibly hard to put up that invisible barrier and not let what he says hurt you and break your heart, but if you can keep your eye on the “big picture” which is that the longer your husband stays in effective treatment and continues to take the right meds --the sooner you will see your husband return to you…and when he does “come back” you will easily be able to forgive all that came before…it just feels so good to have them back again and often they don’t even recall what they said or how they seemed to feel when they were unstable and delusional. It takes many months (as I have mentioned before) and sometimes as long as a year to see the full benefits of proper medication and in that time your nerves, your heart and your resilience will be tested over and over. Hang in there, and above all take the time outs you need to recharge yourself, talk to a friend, meditate, pray, walk in the woods, or take a nap…or get a counselor of your own to help you through…I wish you guys the best outcome possible.
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I’m trying but I think I’ve lost him now and that’s it I need to accept that I have lost my husband if I just got one moment of otherwise from him. It it’s actually his constant so I guess I need to deal I’m just overwrought right now
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He keeps adding that we don’t know what the future holds and if we stay friends who knows but honestly that’s actually pissing me off he can’t have it both ways. If he leaves I am done he is not coming back and I won’t be waiting a year to see if he changes his mind and wants to return I’m getting up there I need to keep my life movin I can’t wait around for him to divorce me and go on meds and want me again IF that shluld even happen that’s ridiculous
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