Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

Frustration...frustration.....feeling hopeless

So my father may not go forward with the ect tomorrow. He expressed much fear telling my mom why do you want me to fry my brain? He said that it’ll mess his brain up even more.
We will leave it be until he decides on his own to do it. Maybe he will surprise us…but I’m going with no.
He isn’t getting any better yet. Change of meds will come soon if he forgoes the ect now.
I’m starting to feel like I’ll never have my dad back.
He’s nothing but a ball of negativity now…even terribly mean to my mother sometimes…then one minute normal. No one was kidding when they said this was a long long road to travel. Just needed to vent! My apologies.

Im sorry you are going through this. I would also deny ect if I was ever to recieve that treatment. I believe its outdated. Is your father med compliant? Maybe try new meds

I was offered ect when all meds failed, they even brought in a lady who had improved after the treatments, but I backed out of it because I was too afraid of it.

The negativity can get pretty strong with me when I get very down on the way my life has turned out and I feel helpless about it.

I also have a lot of allergies, and usually when I’m extremely irritable and negative, I’ll find something in the house has mold on it, can be simple like the black mold on the stopper in the sink-ew gross!
or citrus that has green mold and hiding in a corner of the kitchen, fruit tossed in a garbage can NOT in the kitchen escapes a thorough wash and can hide on the bottom of the can.

Once it gets tossed or washed, my attitude improves a lot. The mold symptoms come on so gradually I don’t usually realize how negative I can be until I can’t stand myself anymore.
I never mean to be so ugly and negative to hurt anyone.

I once begged the doctor to give me ect for compulsive behavior. I don’t know if it works for that, but I was at a loss as to what to do. I’d be a little afraid of it now because I’m afraid it would mess up my writing. Everyone in your family deserves the medal of honor for having to live with your dad’s illness. Dealing with sz can be exhausting.