Thank you in advance for reading this. I am trying to think of a way to keep things vague so as to protect privacy, but I desperately need d advice.
I am a 24f dating a 33m. He has a diagnosis and has been hospitalized previously but that happened prior to me meeting him. He currently has not been taking his medication for at least a year (I watched him flush it down the sink once). He self medicated with pot and I’m not sure if that makes his symptoms worse care deeply about him and want to see a future for us together but at the moment our relationship is not an equal partnership, he doesn’t leave his apartment much due to paranoia and doesn’t have a job.
His family I hesitate greatly to speak on because I do not know what they have endured, I only met them very recently. His rent is paid for by family and the remote job he has, when he chooses to do it, was given to him by a close family member.
I have read up on LEAP and have tried desperately to find support in my area through NAMI but at present there are no offices near me.
I have lost my patience several times because I am his biggest point of contact with the outside world at this point in time- he has no friends other than xbox and sees his family on his schedule. What spurred me to come on here after lurking for so long is his mother asked us to leave her home last night on Christmas Eve after he began getting agitated and made a few remarks that were rude and threatening toward her. It was my first time at her home and I didn’t know how to diffuse the situation as she cried and told him he needed medication. (I agree that he does need medication but I know from my own experience with him that her approach did nothing except rile him and put him on the defensive. )
I also tried distancing myself a few weeks ago, because he thought I was a secret agent and smashed my phone. But he knows where I live and has come by my house and workplaces to find me. I don’t say this to alarm anyone about my safety but to give context to how his paranoia has driven away those in his life (as soon as he smashed my phone, he felt remorse and has repeatedly apologized). He isn’t well and I don’t want to walk away felt someone who has the potential to be a wonderful life partner, but I did receive advice from several people that I should walk away from this because it could become increasingly unsafe.