Take your friend to the hospital. If he won’t go, then Go to your county court house, inquire about the mental health committment process. Each state in the US is different on their laws about this. It sounds like your friend needs professional help, and you need the help of professional people.
@iamoliviar schizophrenics don’t think reasonable or logically. Your going to have to start to have a serious talk with him. You need to have a intervention with him. And express to him that he is ill. Have things printed out about the symptoms of schizophrenia, and tell him about the evidence of what k2 does to the brain. He will probably respond to you about delusional nonsense, but keep pressing the subject. Make him know that until he accepts that he is ill, recovery will not happen. He doesn’t have insight because of his thought process. But try to show him the changes that happened in his life when he smoked k2. The only way to stop delusional thinking is if, you have insight on what is real, and you understand it. Marijuana is the one thing he needs to know as bad for him. Once he knows he’s ill he needs to understand he needs to do everything he can to possible recover, and if he doesn’t then you do not see a future with him. Until he has the right tools, he will stay the same. You can’t cut a tree with a axe gentlely and compassionally, you have to be direct and straightforward
If that doesn’t work I have another plan, I understand how delusions are developed.
K2 is NOT good at all…I never tried it thank God. I met some people who have and around here the law treats it like any other drug so people are getting locked up over it too.
me and Ay watched a video last year of a teenager who took like 2 or 3 hits and he was on the ground rolling around in a delirium and was totally disoriented after his friend helped him up.
Something to stay away from. I would say just from what I’ve seen and heard that it can cause SZ symptoms, heavily.
What on earth is K2? Also, for that matter, what is “spice”?
K2 and Spice is synthetic marijuana…
I’ve seen my younger cousin messed up on that stuff. I was amazed how out of his head he was. It’s not like normal pot. I was thinking… no one should be that completely out of control and that far out of their head on just a few hits. Even XTC or Acid is nicer to your head then that stuff.
Hello everyone! Thank you so much for all of the insight! I’ll clear up some things I feel I didn’t make clear enough:
- He only did K-2 about four times, all in a matter of weeks. He only smokes weed now. He smokes once or twice a day, but has never touched K-2 again.
- He is not scared of his thoughts. He actually LOVES them and thinks he has all of this power and insight on life. He loves that he can “change the vibe” of a whole room, control other people with his emotions, read their minds and understand them and see their secrets. He loves that he will meet aliens. He loves that he made up this world and says that people will soon be able to choose to live inside a world he has created since he was a child and he said, just last night, “I hope they like it. What dragon would you want?” He loves that he’ll have more powers.
- Nobody (as of now) has ever said they would harm him or has tried to scare him. Nobody has told him to do anything or hurt himself or others.
It’s hard to get him to want to get help because he enjoys the thoughts. He is excited for all it will bring. He is excited to meet aliens and get wings and see space and smoke space weed and have people live in a world he has created. He thinks he is all powerful. He told me that he has been hiding a lot of his new-found power and new-found roles from me. It sort of hurt my feelings, but I guess I shouldn’t take it personally.
My gay friend came over last night and we had a great time playing Super Smash Bro’s Brawl and chatting. But then Dan became weird over time and talked out loud about things that didn’t match what was being said. He said he was just accidentally thinking out loud. He became all weird and withdrawn and irritated. He kept moving away from me. Once my friend left, Dan said that my gay friend was flirting with me… My friend, Ben, was in on something and plotting something and was testing Dan in some way that wasn’t clear to me. I guess Ben wanted to have sex with me and wanted to make Dan “look like a bitch.” Ben and I were plotting something against Dan.
Dan said that if I was plotting something for Sunday (when everyone gets their power, wings and their good or evil nature is revealed) and trying to fight him I will lose. If I’m trying to attack him I should let him know now. He doesn’t want to feel like an idiot. He keeps saying if I’m lying about something that he’ll just leave me like “THIS!” and he snaps his fingers and says he won’t give a fuck. And it just hurts me so much I start crying. And he thinks I’m crying because I’m “worried” because I’m “hiding something.” But it just hurts so much having someone I love so much keep saying every day that he is going to leave me and “not give a fuck” in an instant. Especially because nothing is happening. I am trying to help him and I’m the only one who has constantly been here for him and he’s losing sight of this…
He thinks I might be a fallen angel (which is evil) or some evil entity. It just makes me sad, because at the beginning of his delusions he thought we were soul mates who were going to leave together with aliens and be happy and I was the only one who he trusted and wanted to be with. Now I’m the only one who seems to be getting shit on by him. I’m the only one who is getting pushed away and having mean things said to me.
He isn’t as sweet as he was. He seems meaner, calloused… I’m scared that he won’t be able to become the same Dan I first loved.
I am trying to make an appointment with a therapist and Dan has agreed to come with me if the event on Sunday doesn’t happen. (I feel he’ll try to avoid it again or make up another event we have to wait for). But I hope I’m able to get him to come with me. I am scared they’ll take him away in a hospital, but I know it’s better to get him help now rather than wait till he’s even worse. And I’m even more afraid that he’ll become worse, so I know it’s the best for him and for me. We just don’t have the money to have him in a hospital or on medication. I also don’t have the money to support us without him working. We’ll probably lose the apartment. But maybe I’ll find a way to still live with him.
Let’s hope.
Again, thank you everyone for your support. I feel tears and a smile every time I read your advice. I’m glad there are people who understand and listen.
My son can enjoy it when he becomes psychotic. I guess it’s a bit of mania. He couldn’t tell me what or how he was doing things because I couldn’t handle the power or I wasn’t allowed to know yet.
See if you can find a crisis outreach team in your area. They can come to your home and assess him there. It really does sound like he is experiencing a psychotic episode or break. To my knowledge these breaks can cause brain damage so the sooner he gets treatment the better.
Obama and the evil goat sign
I hate to admit it… but I too have enjoyed a few of my more psychotic and manic times. I have loved the hidden knowledge of the universe and the only one who can predict the future from the wind. The spike of superhuman energy is amazing. What a euphoric rush…
But that paranoia kicks in and makes it all ugly and then I’m hurting people around me and scaring away friends and saying horrid things to people I love.
Loosing sight of how much you’ve been there for him is part of the illness.
Becoming callous and shut down is part of the illness, the emotions are becoming effected. Have you been looking over the Web site at all?
Signs and symptoms…
What to do during the psychosis
http://www.schizophrenia.com/sznews/archives/005561.html
I’m rooting for you.
Thank you for the advice. I will try to see what I have in my area. It’s a small area of CT so I doubt we have much… I think he is definitely schizophrenic at this point. I know the weed makes it worse, but even when he doesn’t smoke for three or more days, he has the same thoughts, paranoid episodes and ideas of the future. I am scared to have someone come to our house because I know Dan will not trust it and will blame me for betraying him. And I’d feel I might have betrayed him… even though I know it’s for the best. I also don’t want him taken away but I know it might be necessary.
Thank you for the further insight. It sounds more like him. He is so excited for the events to come. He thinks he has this huge role in the Universe. He is important to me. He is my world. But it’s unrealistic for him to matter this much to others, people who have never met him, aliens. We live in an area of little or no importance compared to cities. It’s not very realistic that he’d be part of this huge scheme or that Michelle Obama would care about his Facebook or that the aliens would care about our town.
I admire his creativity and courage and unique thoughts. I admire his brain. He has always been creative and seen things in a new light. But one thing I loved about him was his sweetness and understanding nature, and that’s gone… I love his unique aspect on life. But I don’t like the part where he hurts me and insults me and makes up things about me. I’m not trying to sound mean, but I have been the only person in his life - besides his mom, who is in Puerto Rico - who has always stood by him. We have gone through a lot and I’ve never once lied or betrayed him. I just want us to be happy together…
Maybe one is listed here:
http://connecticut.networkofcare.org/mh/services/subcategory.aspx?tax=RP-1500.8000-500
My son blamed me for his last admission and someone else for every admission before that. Lack of insight into what is happening plays a role.
I know you have never lied or betrayed him… but his paranoia is telling him differently. His illness is cross wiring his head. His insight is going to go, his logic is going to go and he is going to get more out there as this illness eats it’s way through his head.
You are close to him, so he’s going to say it’s you… it’s all you. Even though it’s not.
I figured that was what was happening…
He told me he was scared that he was wrong about me and that I’m actually all of this awful stuff and he wouldn’t say all of this if he didn’t care about me. I know he just loves me a lot and it’s making him panic that I could be doing all these awful things he supposedly sees… I wish there was a way to explain to him that I’m not doing anything but I know it’s not that simple…
Wow, thank you so much for all of the amazing resources. It makes me feel better knowing I have these. Thank you.
Does your son still blame you? Once they get help, do they still think you’re the bad guy or do they see that you actually care? Are they conflicted by these two opposite emotions?
During psychosis my son thought I was trying to kill him. Yes he blamed me for having him admitted to hospital for no reason. He couldn’t see what I saw. Paranoia and psychosis where controlling his thoughts and feelings. As he became stable on medications the paranoia went away and he didn’t think I was trying to kill him anymore. He still, 8 months later, blames me for having him admitted but not in a negative way. He understands that I did it because I love him and because he wasn’t eating or sleeping. The best I can explain is that even after someone becomes stable the memory of a situation doesn’t change. Your memories are your memories. Someone telling you that something was not how you remember it doesn’t change how you remember it. I saw someone who went 3+ days barely eating, drinking or sleeping and so distracted by voices/spirits that he could barely hear me. He remembers an overprotective mother that overreacted to him not eating and sleeping. I don’t know if you have ever gotten too high or drunk. Scary high. Were things just don’t make sense. Your senses are reeling and everything is just too much. Later when straight someone can tell you what happened but the experience is still a jumbled mess of thoughts and feelings. I think that is what it is like. I think it must be conflicting for my son. I try not to bring it up as it upsets him when I talk about what I saw during his last break.
@BarbieBF Thanks for the story. That must be really hard for you to be trying so hard to help your son that you obviously care so much about, just to be viewed as the bad guy. I can feel your pain in that area.
UPDATE: The second event Dan tried to predict did not happen.
He went to my mom’s family Easter get-together on the Cape. He was acting a little funky, but nothing that stood out. Then he randomly moved away from me to sit at the table with all of my male cousins. He asked them if their dad was making faces at him or sleeping (he was laying with sunglasses on across the porch). Then they offered him weed for 4/20. I immediately got up and left with my cousin, Kate, to go for a walk because I was upset.
When I came back from the walk, Dan asked if he could talk to me alone outside. I talked to him and he became very distraught. He said, “Why did you bring me here?” I answered that it was to spend time with him and see my family. He said, “They said they were trying to eat me.” He pretended to read my mind where I supposedly had said, “We want to eat you” which I obviously was not thinking. He got all flustered and asked if I had an arranged marriage with my cousin… I said no. He kept saying I could have him. I told him I didn’t want him because he’s my cousin and that I only love him, Dan.
Dan became okay. He discussed the upcomming event. On the car ride home, he kept talking to himself and I could tell it scared my mom. He kept saying things that were incomplete thoughts. I know he thinks he’s saying everything out loud, but it’s usually in his head. He kept saying things that weren’t related to our actual conversation, then talking to himself and looking out the window. I kept comforting him. But I could tell my mom was weirded out. He said, “Are you on my side?” I said of course I am. He said, “Is your mom?” I said, yes. “Why won’t she say anything??” And I said she just didn’t understand. My mom was acting very nice about it and just kept talking to me, but I knew she was getting upset.
When we got home, we waited for the event. When it didn’t come he went to go meditate. I was scared that he would pretend that this started the event. He came out and said the event still hadn’t happened. He felt let down and sad and questioned himself. He had been starving himself that day (he wasn’t hungry). I told him to eat cereal. He did. I told him he wasn’t crazy. I said I loved his mind and didn’t want it to ever change, but that he needed help to not get it confused with his other life - me and his job. I told him he has to become healthy and stable, but that I would never let anyone take his thoughts or use them against him or make him “normal.”
He seemed happy with this.
We cuddled and went to bed. But he kept asking me questions from 11:00 PM to 4:00 AM. I didn’t sleep the entire night as I answered questions about my loyalty, about his mind, about the events, about therapy. He said he would never be mean to me again. He refused to let go of me and cried because he felt bad about being mean. I told him it was okay.
When we woke up he said that he didn’t want to go to therapy. I told him in the car that he needed help and that he promised. He agreed. He asked if I was on his side or if I was doing something or in on something. I said no.
I guess I’m happy that he now doesn’t view me as a threat. He just wants his questions answered at all times of the day because he “doesn’t want to make a mistake/feel dumb/lose me.” I know he loves me a lot. But I wish we could have a normal conversation. He is at work right now. I hope he is doing okay. I hope when I pick him up he’s not going to become angry and confused again. He said I’m the only therapy he needs and I know this isn’t true.
He agreed to “not smoke weed until the event happens” but I don’t know how long that will last without a tantrum or anger or a threat that we’ll break up if I try to “control” his life. For now, I’m taking away his bowls and lighters and hiding them somewhere. I’m hoping I can talk him through it without him trying to guilt or threaten me.
I don’t know if I am one of the older people on here as I just posted yesterday for the first time about my brother-in-law. The reason I’m bringing up age is because I suspect I’m in the parent demographic rather than contemporary age group for you.
I am not an expert on schizophrenia though I’ve watched my B-I-L for 25 years going through this, and his mother trying to manage him. A girlfriend lasted for a short while until his psychosis drove her away. His mother thought she could cure him with home cooking and that he was just eccentric.
You are very young. He is very ill, and it could be a long time before he’s better. That is, if he gets help and gets better. Women tend to try to fix things and take on the emotional burdens of those they love. I have watched young women stay with men who are bad for them for different reasons, and it’s a train wreck before it’s through. You will not escape undamaged.
You are already trying to control his weed use by hiding his devices. I used to hide my dad’s alcohol. Didn’t work. Your sweet boy is not the same person he was when you met. This is serious stuff.
As in all things, people have to choose for themselves to change a behavior whether it’s smoking or drinking or drug use or whatever their addiction may be. Sadly, your boyfriend isn’t capable of making good choices at this point. Or as the cop said to my husband when his brother caused an incident at a care facility, “he’s not responsible for himself right now”.
If you were my daughter, I would ask you to consider that your love alone might not be enough to bring him through this to a better spot. He needs professional help. And you deserve a safe and happy life. I am not saying that happy life can’t be with your boyfriend, but it can’t be with him the way he is right now.