Helpless, hopeless and sad

Involuntary committing brings forth all kinds of emotions and guilt in these situations. You did the best you could under the circumstances. We do not read minds nor crystal balls, and there was no way to know your husband would become violent. Be gentle with yourself. We have so many daily challenges.

2 Likes

Yes, evil laughter. Like the devilā€™s foretelling great pain and damageā€¦
Asognosia.
Dealing with right now.
Is a brick wall
And my familyā€™s left me somewhat alone to cope with, as I initially agreed to let her move in
Been a rollercoaster, now is a nightmare

1 Like

Thereā€™s something called Diabetic Psychosis
I heard about from a L.I.S.W.
I say ā€œtrust your gutā€ when it comes to your husbandā€™s care.
Young Docā€™s are exactly that, unseasoned, which is why theyā€™re doing residencies in teaching hospitals.
Have you had a Doc order 15 tests for you when youā€™re insurance-less ? Thatā€™s a young Doc.

1 Like

Hi Ginger,
Iā€™m dealing with very similiar situation.
I donā€™t want to have my sibling commited ! Iā€™m waiting, for what -IDK.
The stress is overwhelming.
Yet, the hospital wanted to send him home - and he was subsequently arrested. Did they send him home because he conned them or was so difficult that they refused him ? All or none of the above ? Maybe insurance wouldnā€™t cover ? No insurance ?
In hospital, out again - was he off his medicine ?
How did the state hospitalization go ?
Iā€™m genuinely curious. That wasnā€™t snark.
If the hospitilizations are so helpful, and in terms of modifying psychosis, they are, then why the rehospitalizations?
Iā€™m glad your husband is willing to be hospitilized. My sibling often isnā€™t, becomes extremely resentful while there. And afterwards,
views MDā€™s as punitive and cold, and I wonder if they are to her increasingly because of her Anosogmia.
An endless circle.
In the midst of it all sheā€™s made an exquisite drawing of yellow roses. Ink and oil pigment, I think. Not sure. It doesnā€™t matter what she uses. The talent is undeniably there but the madness destroys it.
I donā€™t mean to sound so negative.
As caregivers, weā€™re vulnerable.
Extremely.

Yes, and I wonder why involuntary hospitilizations invariably do just that.
Certainly, theyā€™re less stressful than they used to be.
The restricted access to the outdoors.
Restrictions in general.
Sheā€™s not suicidal, but so ill Iā€™ve been having uneasy reactions. Locking my door at night.

Iā€™m sorry, its awful to be afraid to go to sleep. Do you have a good lock on the door?

1 Like

His lab work was ok, sugar level was 253 which is high but they are giving him a low carb diet. I actually spoke to the doctor who is seeing him there and liked her. She did mention possibly dementia and also Capgras Delusions. She told me to just have patience and also suggested i should not try to speak on the phone with him or to visit for a few days because it agitates him. In his mind, the woman who is showing up in the lobby and who is trying to speak to him on the phone is NOT his wife, but an imposter who has taken over his wifeā€™s body. So thatā€™s where we arenā€™t tonight. Thank you all so much for listening.

2 Likes

Capgras delusions are common in paranoid schizophrenia according to Wikipedia - also in other conditions as well. Are you doing okay with all this?

@SewNonnie
Amazing the common trait I am hearing. While in a difficult psychosis lasting weeks at the treatment center, our daughter believed another person was acting as an imposter, as her (daughter) , and that the other resident was talking with her biological mother (daughtersā€™ bio mom) and trying to trick bio mom into taking this other resident (the accused imposter of haug her we) home.

Daughter was so convinced, she walked up to resident who was on the shared phone, and clocked the resident in the head/face.

Daughter did get charges for that violent act (whole nother story) which were dealt with ā€¦

My point is, during those times, we were asked to not visit too as caused even more much agitation for her.

This delusion SHOULD go away - in a little time. And you wonā€™t be an imposter forever. This WILL pass. And quite honestly, probably only you (and doc) will ever know it happened.

Sorry you are going through this. Best option is to not take it personal - this is the illness - not your loved one. :heart:

This situation WILL get better, that I do know.

3 Likes

Yes. At least that.
I blow up at her bcse Iā€™m so frustrated.
Not helpfulā€¦
Tell her she needs to grow up, take some responsibility, stop living in filth, thatā€™s sheā€™s dirty - she doesnā€™t bathe or comb her hair some times.
Or wash her clothes. Or sheets. Or towels. Or rinse her toothbrush. Or wipe the counter after sheā€™s spilled something. Or pay for bills. Or repair damage sheā€™s done to property. In short, a pain in the ass.
But this is her disease. On meds. Not like that.
So I laid down the law, lo and behold, she asked for her pill tonight. Usually she pulls a bunch of shit about them. So I donā€™t kick her out or call the cops for her psychotic behavior.

1 Like

Frankly, I am a mess! On the other hand, my house isnā€™tā€¦ I am trying to keep myself busy. We have been married 39 1/2 years and this is the longest we have ever went without seeing each other. Itā€™s very strange to me.

1 Like

What did CAT scans and MRI show ?

I am so sorry you are dealing with this.
Last year about this time we started on a similar journey. My son meds had recently been changed (once again :frowning: )and he decided the side effects were too much to bear any longer. The sudden stoppage made things so much worse. We tried to get him admitted but the ER doc released him with a promise to call his pdoc in the morning (so as not to bother anyone on Sunday!!!) Things deteriorated and we had to get an involuntary admit. Then we discovered, as you did, getting the paperwork was only the beginning of the battle. When we were told if he picked up a weapon they would shoot, we were shocked. I get this is sometimes a dangerous task, but shooting mentally ill person you are trying to help just seems wrong. We were fortunate that they agreed to back off and try another time. After a couple of days, he did go peacefully but refused to talk to anyone in the family and hired a court appointed attorney to get himself released. And yes he fully believed docs told him he was not schizophrenic and to just take the meds to get released. The evil insurance company in another state reviewed records and said he was no longer a danger to himself. Wellā€¦duh, he was confined.
So he was released angry and delusional taking the insurance company decided and what he believed the docs to say as proof he is not ill.
Fast forward, he is still refusing meds, but is talking to us again. Will not see his pdoc again, but knows he has an illness and chooses to live odd rather than on meds. We have told him we will abide by this as long as he is not a danger to himself or others.
And as an aside, when my son was talking to his pdoc he was told schizophrenia appears to lead to dementia. I care for my mom with Alzheimer Dementia, and see some similarities. My sz son and AD mom seem to enjoy each others company though.

It is commendable you are committed to staying by his side in this battle. Keep coming back for encouragement and to vent. Please know, even when you feel alone, you are not.

2 Likes

He hasnā€™t agreed to let them do the MRI or CT scan yet.

One of the last visits to a medical professional a request for a CT scan was made as meds were not doing as well as hoped. He flatly refused stating he is not a science experiment. I really wish he would have cooperated and am hoping you get the cooperation we never got.

1 Like

How is she today? It was hard when my son lived inside, having to clean up the kitchen after he had pulled an all nighter - nearly every night. Eating all the food he could find.

Its easy to become frustrated.

Iā€™m so sorry, I have been married a long time also. My husband worries about dementia issues being in his future.

He is now taking all meds as required and Iā€™m hoping he will reach out to me. Iā€™m doing as the doctor suggested, giving him time before I request him to allow me to visit or talk on phone.

3 Likes

Sheā€™s better only in the sense Iā€™m better.
She knows sheā€™s gone too far and is getting kicked out so is apologizing.
Your son sounds impossible. Sorry, I know he was ill. But really, when theyā€™re off meds theyā€™re assholesā€¦

One step forward - 2 steps backā€¦ he is back to refusing all meds this morning.

1 Like