Hi all stopping in for a catch up ,
as of today and what I know brother is at my fathers home still .
Its been about 10 days of him being there alone my dad has stopped by a few times to check in, but cannot stay the home is still in disrepair and hoarded state.
I went ahead and made APS reports for both of them last wk.
was contacted last friday by my brothers case worker just let her know the history etc. .
I also asked if there would ever be a possibility of getting a court order for med in the state of NV and was told no basically no way it would be against the rights of said person .
Having that feeling of whatās next what can I do? trying to sit and tolerate the uncertainty.
Have you looked into your dad getting an injunction on your brother. Maybe in conjunction with the APS report it would be an option. About five yrs. ago, I served one on my SZ son and his gf and her mother in FL when they refused to leave my home. After being served they had 30 days to leave. It was one of the most uncomfortable 30 days Iāve experienced but necessary and in hind-sight most necessary.
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Iām four chapters into the I AM NOT SICK I Donāt Need Help! book, and attended my first NAMI support group online earlier this evening. I feel a little emotionally numb. Iām not entirely sure why, but I think I just need more time to let what Iām learning settle.
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My Family to Family lead instructor always says that only hindsight is 20/20 when looking at decisions for our family members.
After our Family to Family classes, my husband and I used to stop and have a beer on the way home. We would just sit there staring - just like we had done when Mike told us that we werenāt aware we were calling him names but we WERE doing it. āEmotionally numbā and trying to absorb.
I hope the online support group was helpful.
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I looked up injunction for state of NV from what I can understand hopefully reading it right.
In his case injunction would be a temp. restraining order or permanent .
my Dad did have a restraining order in effect over a year a go , sounds like he doesnāt want to do that again because it did not end up being any type of solution my brother became homeless and to paranoid and disruptive to stay in the shelter , cares camp or any of the programming available so just out in the streets completely vulnerable until my Dad was able to take him back in .
I just received a voicemail from Dad today that his Aps worker contacted him and had no help for his situation and has turned it back to the most team which is the countys (moblile outreach crisis response ) team
we are very familiar with them and have had no luck with a solution that way thus far ,off and on over 5yrs.
His voice sounded soooo deflated I really feel Furious that we are here again in this dark unhopeful space . Im trying to maintain hope and responded with we Will find a solution and for my dad to try and focus on his own health for now.
So the positives for this moment are Dad has a safe space with his sister rn.
We know where my brother is and he is not out on the streets.
Thankful for this space !
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Hi,My husband and I went to a monthly Nami Support group meeting last night, I am feeling emotional from it, so many sad stories concerning mental illness. There were all parents there last nite and some were new to this life of dealing with severe mental illness and older parents that had been dealing with it for 30 years. I did leave feeling that I was not alone.
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Glad you tried meeting and am reading book! After I read the book, things made more sense.
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Thank you. It was encouragement enough for me to go to the NAMI meeting. I met some nice people.
My loved one was in the hospital when I asked that. They are home now. They are on the injection now too. They are still not fully better but have came along ways. They get the next loading dose of it soon. I think that will help a lot.
They have one med which is oral. They took it and stopped a while. They have been taking it faithfully for a good bit now. I think they will continue. I donāt have to ask them anymore they just go get it themselves.
The road to insight is still a challenge.
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Those are good positives.
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Well, it could be worse, that is my new motto. Lol
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So, I have been still slowly reading the book, and toward the end, and now also having started reading Nonviolent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg, also recommended here on the forum.
My son w/sz has yet to reach out to me since the end of May shortly followed by my initial post here. At first I wrestled with whether to reach out to him first but then felt such relief when in June a mother in the online NAMI support group said with her son w/sz she let him call the shots and wait to reach out to her first. But, I am a little surprised that he hasnāt as of yet. And, embarrassed to say that Iām glad he hasnāt. I did not realize how burnt out 
I have become with trying to maintain a relationship with someone who is suffering from psychosis. Strange because this last time we had re-connected, I had really enjoyed having the connection. He wasnāt living with me and I could set boundaries with how, when and where I spoke and/or visited with him. Iām just surprised I needed this much time and space apart from him to miss him. Sad to say, but true nonetheless. Ugh.
As of today my unmedicated loved one brother, has been removed from my fathers home because the city has decided to condemn ,and are offering no more chances to attempt to clean property. after chasing cars up the street there were more complaints and the sheriff and city said his choice was hospital or leave premises he left.
Im in another state likely he will try to reach out to my dad .
But my Dad has no where for him to go as he already had to leave the home because of his health and the stress.
I told my dad for now the only option he could offer is to take brother to treatment.
Mean while the city has now decided to tell my Dad 14 days to clean property or face a huge fine.
Dads unable to even stand for long 
what Im doing ā¦ Iāve left a message for brothers social worker and most team asking them to circle around and offer treatment again. will call several places for property clean up in the am I guess at least thatās my plan for now
oh and I may go scream into a pillow! Im just so frustrated by the cycle at this point .
thanks for the space
I totally understand the need to scream into a pillow. I used to actually attack my pillows sort of like punching bags. My mom taught me that when I was a frustrated child.
Sigh, remember you can only do what you can doā¦ donāt be too hard on yourself. I think helping your dad is good. Your brother may have placed himself beyond being helped, sadly.
My unmedicated cousin is still living under a bridge in Oakland with her illness and a homeless community she now feels a part of. She is helped with occassional CashApp monies, and that is all now. She got help for 4 years, then the family had to stop paying for her places to live. Sheās surviving OK, but everyone wishes it could be different.
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Spent most of yesterday facilitating a jail furlough for my brother to a mental ward, only to have them refuse to admit him, so we had to cart him right back to jail. Unbeknownst to me, the jail already prescribed medication which he was refusing to take. He thought he was going to talk doctors into prescribing him Lithium and give him a lengthy stay so he could avoid prison food. He was calm and not outwardly delusional or agitated for most of it, until my mother mentioned medication which got him riled. Hospital staff handed him additional prescriptions for medication to take back with him to jail which he vowed he would throw away.
After I left him with a bail bondsman to return him to jail, he proceeded to monologue about the many delusions that put him in the jail to begin with and associated homicidal ideations related to a neighbor and the object of his erotomania. It never ceases to amaze me, how he fails to realize that people communicate about such matters. Thankfully heād signed a HIPAA release with the forensic counselor tasked with his restorative services, so Iām just itching to tell him all about his vast delusional system heās been covering-up since he realized the gig was up. Theyād revoked his bond to get this going, so heās not getting out of jail until he starts cooperating with treatment.
It was tough on the family to get to this point and refuse to bond him out for over three months, but I feel we made the right decision. Now itās up to him.
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wow that must of been frustrating when he wasnāt accepted at the hospital!
Thatās huge you got a hippa release and they will keep him until treatment compliant ?
I have in the past called the nurses at the jail my brother was at .I know they couldnāt tell me much but ,I was still able to give his history and diagnosis to them .
Being in jail was one of the very few times he stayed medicated and stabilized for a short time.
I still donāt understand why sometimes they are accepted for treatment and other times not Once after being released from jail I had talked him into going straight to inpatient behavioral unit he went in with SI intentions told them he was carrying a heavy rock in his bag to smash his head with and was turned away. I had even phoned ahead and let the staff know he would be coming .
Hi Not Alone, It is good you are getting a break from your son. They really do drain you. Just enjoy it and do some nice things for yourself. He must be doing ok or he would probably reach out for help from you. Whew, no word is often good news and a time to recover from the last episode you had with him.
I feel supported and understood, thanks Irene.
His birthday was over the weekend. Itās one of a very few of those, in which we had no communication, so what you said is even more meaningful for me.
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Thanks not alone! After the last couple days dealing with my son, your kind words are so welcome. I will write more about my sonās anticās soon. Too exhausted and traumatized right now.
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The interplay between knowing the laws, trying to get them applied and knowing your loved oneās likely responses are often crucial to getting the laws applied the right way to a good result. After 3 years of mostly unmedicated life, my daughter chose to take medication while in jail, in order to be released (the second time she was jailed). The trick is for the family to keep trying, since sometimes despite best intentions, the loved one doesnāt always respond in the ārightā fashion. Getting HIPPA forms signed is big.
@Irene I hope you got some reprieve over the weekend. If and when you are ready and feel to share regarding his antics, I look forward to reading about it.
over the weekend, my sz son made first contact towards me for the first time since the incident which precipitated my seeking and finding and joining this forum.
It was one of his previous frequent ways of just sending me a link in my fb dms to a youtube video topic on aliens / gov / spirituality.
I was reluctant to even see what he might have said when I first saw the notification because of past dramas, but was a bit relieved it was just the link, and glad that he at least felt to initiate reaching out. But, as of yet, I havenāt felt inclined to reply. So, idkā¦