Thank all of you for sharing your stories. I will share my story later. I just want to say that I have been through a little bit but of each of your stories. My boyfriend was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia in 2020. When we met in 2018 I was on the streets and using “all” the drugs. He helped me out if that life, while being in psychosis " he was not diagnosed at this time" He didn’t trust me a lot of the time, but when we talk about our pass he tells me I am the only one who would listen to him. And he found that he felt safe with me. He loved me long before I loved him. Although I’ve always felt safe with him no matter the “craziness” we went through. We no have our own place, two cars, and I have a job. We was working together for a couple years but I lost my job, and he found it difficult to work without me sue to his anxiety and schizophrenia. He also has the best father anyone can have witch helps us out greatly though his love for his son. We have some pretty tough days, sometimes I feel “I’m going to lose my mind” but the love I have for him, the love he has for me, and the love his father has for him is what keeps us going.
I hope you are okay. Your story is terrifying. I would suggest making many redundant plans to escape and/or protect yourself if you choose to stay with him. You said y’all live in a bus conversation so you can use the horn as an alarm. Since y’all are on their property, discuss your plans with his family if you believe they will help you. When the psychosis focuses on you it can be unpredictable and come unexpectedly. When my Wife got paranoid about me she was very good at hiding it at first. I had my suspicions which were confirmed before to long. I didn’t sleep much during that time. What I picture when I imaging being a woman and she a man during her psychosis is as bad as it gets, the end. What they experience is often very real to those with SZ. When someone is in the fight or fight response, in fear of you, it is a very serious situation if their instinct is to fight. I have read a lot of others experiences over the past several years. I also have a couple acquaintances that were in a relationship with a schizophrenic man and both of their stories began similar to your’s and ended counting their blessings. Take care of yourself. You know what is best for you. Let us know you are okay.
Waving at you like one of those wacky, inflatable, flailing arm men they put up at car lots. Lol.
My Wife and I have been separated over two years now. We didn’t have any children so I didn’t have that stress but it was an enduring struggle none the less. I did my best but protecting myself as well as her, from her, eventually took it’s toll. I was returning to the shop after doing (screwing up really) an estimate and got into an accident. I was on autopilot. My mind had checked out. I was crying so hard on the side of the road I couldn’t communicate with the officer at first and the person in the other car probably thought I was dying or very seriously injured. I was crying because I knew that I had to make the choice I didn’t want to make. I question that choice everyday. It’s truly a tragedy. I can’t bring myself to divorce her because I think it will trigger her and, well, I don’t want a divorce. I’m certain she doesn’t either. At the same time I know she believes that I don’t desire her and that I wanted to leave her. I have to drive by her parents house and catch her outside in order to speak with her. I’m unwelcome there because her parents blame me. They are too ashamed to accept her diagnosis and dismissed my pleas for help, with accusations. I haven’t been able to move on romantically yet. Not sure if the feeling of guilt or depression is the main reason for that. Being the optimist I am, I insanely have hope for us knowing it’s hopeless. Today, I would be in a better situation financially and otherwise had I taken better care of myself. I don’t know how I could have though especially with all the drama with the in-laws/landlords. The rejection from my wife was probably the hardest for me overall. You can find the rest of my story on this forum if you’re interested. It may be in your best interest to secure yourself financially. Trust your gut. A spouse relationship can be difficult to set strong boundaries, especially financially. In my reading I have concluded that boundaries are the foundation success is built on. Foundations must be strong. You’re not alone.