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How to deal with my sadness of my sons schizophrenia


#21

hi, just want to say i feel exactly like that but have got stronger over the years , please dont give up x


#22

hi so much ignorance isnt there …god bless x


#23

thanks for all your suggestions . ive just joined and have looked after my son for 17 yrs . getting help for me now .thanks again x


#24

Thank you for sharing with us. It is always nice to have insight from someone that has sza. Secondly, I looked your book up, sounds like a good read…will pick up a copy. You can never have too many books!


#25

OMG! How horrible that the pharmacist felt it was their place to make such a comment. I am so sorry you had to go through that. Its frustrating enough seeing love ones deal with an illness through no fault of their own.


#26

My son was diagnosed in 2010… 2 months before his 24th b’day… he’s 30 now. He just started on Invega Trinza… seems to be doing well… he still does not want to take showers, cut his hair or trim his beard… he looks like a mountain man… he has gained a lot of weight too… we take him for yearly physicals and blood work to make sure he is not becoming diabetic. I’m glad he is alive and is on the 3 month injection. I love him unconditionally. I would do anything for him. It’s still hard, but he knows we love him. Hard to believe it’s been 6.5 years… Hang in there, it’s going to be okay.


#27

Hi, just like to say my son was the same for the first few yrars but now (17 yrs on he does wash and shave , sometimes grows a mammoth beard but does eventually shave it off. He is a bit ocd now always cleaning . Does the same at my home (which i dont mind ha ha ) i would really laugh if it wasnt so sad really. Much prefare him working and have a wife or girlfriend but not yey im afrain . Hes just turned 40 he had his first episode at 21 …It does get easier to live with but always a bit stressful im afraid .heres to the future hope its kind to us all…god bless…


#28

Greg - This is invaluable feedback from you for all of our families who are trying to understand where to help; hugs!


#29

About 14 years ago I have been where you are. I remember the crushing and relentless grief. It is something no one can imagine until they’ve been through it. There were people in my life who reached out and helped me. My ex husband was a huge source of comfort and support and there were others as well. Someone suggested I contact NAMI and meet other parents who are going through the something I am. I read a lot about mental illness and sought out stories of hope. I also found this site and I would say sz.com was the biggest source of encouragement and hope because I could come on anytime 24/7 and usually found something encouraging. Hang in there - it will get better and you will adjust to the new normal.


#30

Our son has had a diagnosis for three years and he will soon turn 22. We’re still grieving and I’m just now walking daily (big help) and am going to start cognitive behavior therapy for myself. I was crying every morning and it is sad. I too am a positive person but this is sad. I want to be the best person I can be and encourage him to do the same. I think being able to keep a routine is good for me. I appreciate the advice here.
He is currently in the hospital again adjusting to new medication and he asked to be taken this time. He also agreed to Invega shots since he has such a problem with med compliance. I pray he continues after discharge. I’ve always been close to my son and now I notice gets angrier with me. I do have hope for research to find a cure for this.


#31

I don’t think pharmacists realize how sensitive we are at times around the topic of medicatio. I have found that I often rest when my son rests if possible. I’ve been exercising for a few months and I’m napping less.


#32

I completely understand your pain and it’s perfectly normal for you to feel sadness. I don’t know your story and how long you’ve been dealing with this. For several years I felt desperate to find a cure for my daughter and of course there isn’t a cure. Your son’s life is not hopeless and your life isn’t either. One thing I kept reminding myself is that most humans have strong survival instincts, your son has it and my daughter definitely has it. Join NAMI and meet other parents going through the same thing and you will get support there and feel less alone

I can’t stress enough the importance to finding time to enjoy something just for you – be it a hobby, hanging out with friends, reading a great novel, etc --… I found a hobby I thoroughly enjoy and can get lost in. I found that time does heal. Hang in there – it does get better or I should say how you deal with it gets better and easier and you will feel joy again


#33

Hi AaMark. I can so identify with you. As a mom, my heart pains for you and your son. My son was first diagnosed with SZ on his bday 2 years ago. I found the most important part of healing is my faith first and foremost and getting the best doctors and therapists. We were on a vicious roller coaster for 2 years only to find out that my son had been on a medication known as the “old generation medication” for so long that instead of helping him, his condition got worse. He couldn’t hold a job, he couldn’t keep friends… It was very sad and lonely for all of us. The last resort was when he wanted to take his life but because of his faith he didn’t. When you ask why he didn’t he says, “because if I did, Gods plan for my life would be over”." I cry while writing this because it was very hard. I decided to take him to an ER in a very good hospital where he was treated for 2.5 weeks. Thank God the doctors and staff were so compassionate and helpful. They monitored him and changed his meds to what they call “new generation medication.” He’s been home for 2 weeks and I can’t believe the miraculous change in him. He’s confident and more sociable. He also started working. There is hope but we need to advocate for them which I’m sure you already do. I’m also sure so many others and myself will help you in any way we can. Thank you for sharing your story. There is hope. All is not lost.


#34

Thank you GregBauder36. You’re story has encouraged me immensely .0


#35

Our son was diagnosed at 26, he is now 30. Been a roller coaster, good periods, then when he would go off his meds because of side effects, he would end up in the hospital. Once back on his meds things improve, but he lives with us and we monitor his meds…does t stop him from going into episodes at times, but when he is feeling good, he gets back to what he loves, playing his drums and practicing with other musicians. Even got paid for it. Have to take it one day at a time. Who would think our sons would get this horrible disease, was popular, smart, fun and at 26, he just snapped, and paranoia took over. Once he was committed to the psych ward, he had to be court ordered to be put on meds. He was first given rispodel injections and after being released went to a clinic for his shots. This way you did not have to worry if he took his meds. He now is on pills, olzapine, which seems to be helping.


#36

Thanks for such a uplifting advice. Made my day!


#37

I have been dealing with this pain for 8 years now. It has not gotten easier. The only good thing is that he has finally stopped using drugs.

I guess I should be grateful for this and I am. I have no life. He counts on me for everything. His license was suspended and he cannot drive. Recently, I have felt extremely sad. I have some family support. My x-husband doesn’t care. He is not in his son’s life.

My son is homeless now. He can not live with me because of his felony record. The mental health system is broken and getting help is difficult.

I pray every day that some day I will see a light at the end of this tunnel.

For now I take it a day at a time and hope for the best. My tears have tried up.


#38

I so relate with you darling! I do too. In some ways it is a relief to know why my son’s life imploaded when he was just 14 (he is now 20), but the grief just keeps on going. I know that this is the “new normal” and I “should not” look back, but it is so HARD. I do know that it is ok to grieve and we need to do it as long as we need and that it is OK. Every time my son’s meds don’t work I get hurt so its bad. Keep the faith darling, it does get better!!


#39

Your welcome … We have to have someone to share with or would go stir crazy … Take care of yourself…


#40

I still cry and get exhausted with the helplessness of it all and not able to reassure my son when he is in delusional thoughts voices paranoid etc … But I’m better than I was and my son is albeit for a few days at a time . Please don’t give up hope just try to live a day at a time it helps x