I posted this in the wrong forum - copied here

Family
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Sorry, but i had to create a new account.
I could not sign onto my old account.

I cannot find the “FAMILY” forum. Am I on the wrong forum? PLS advise

I’m just going to read your comments and decide what I may, write about, my adult son Darren, who is a paranoid Schizophrenic.

I find it very difficult to participate without becoming VERY emotional, but I am inspired, encouraged and thankful/grateful for your support, no matter to what degree.

Darren is 42, and owns a home in a small town, Ontario. He was an industrial mechanic millwright until he could no longer work on a continuous basis.

His life is a contiual struggle now with his demons. He was living with us, then had to move out, and has just returned after 5 months. We live in a modest 4 bedroom freehold town house.

He is very close to his mother - she supports him financially and in every way she can, she would die for him. His brother who is 36 resides with us as well and does not have a relationship with Darren

He considers me his adversary - will not talk to me look at me or even be in the same room as I.
He spends MOST of his time cloistered in his bedroom ecept when he goes outside for smoking.

His behavior - I will reveal a little at a time as I can.

He has been aprehended twice in the past to force him into psyciatric care. The last occurrence involved 7 police officers, myself and his brother restraining him after breaking down his bedroom door at 3am a trauma none of us can forget especially Darren because he did not understand what was happening and resisted as if his life depended on it. He spent a short time in Psyc hospital, our home, then moved out, to return to his home.

I think this is a wonderful forum filled with loving,caring people and I look forward to ANY advice you may give me

I have encouraged my wife to participate, but she has not so far chosen to do so. She cannot get over the shame and stigma associated with mental illness

Thank you

Jerry

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Welcome! You are now in the right forum; and it’s okay by the way, same thing happened to me when I signed up. c:

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This used to be my son, and his dad, my husband, was not nearly as understanding of mental illness as you seem to be. They’ve both kind of made a change and now seem to be getting along OK for the most part.

It’s gotten physical with them in the past. My son thought his dad was attacking me, he sprayed his dad in the eyes with pepper spray, his dad swung blindly and broke my son’s nose. I got hit trying to break it all up.

If they can get along, you might be able to find a way to get along too - even if it’s very, very slow and very, very small.

Absolutely everyone knows someone or has a family member that has mental illness. If she’d open up, she’d find out.

I decided a long time ago I was not going to be ashamed of my son - no matter what he has, no matter how he acts. People can be supportive or they can shut up. Those are the only two options I give. Hopefully, your wife will come around. It would help her a lot.

Maybe, it’s really that she feels she’s enabling him too much and doesn’t want to hear a lot of unwanted advice about how she should do things differently? I’ve been there, done that. People here don’t judge - she’d be in a safe place.

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Thank you slw! I appreciate your comments and hope to hear from others.

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Hi Jerry, I’m glad you’re here and posting. Welcome

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Thank you for the welcome Hereandhere.