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My 42 yo wife seems to b sz been a month


#1

First p episode and I’ve had 2 have her admitted for the 3rd time this month couldn’t get her to take meds
And she thinks I’m trying to harm her and that we’re divorced don’t know what to do feel like I’m losing her she is terrified all the time about her safety don’t know if this time she is gonna allow me to be involved with docs ,.Im also gonna need to fight her disability case at work so insurance doesn’t lapse and im down to days with no real authority to do it on her behalf and she can’t even have the conversation with me at all she hates me or the disease does
Need help


#3

Oh my that’s exactly what I’ve been dealing with and it’s so new thanks for that can’t stop crying like a little girl it’s so Sad I am so Sad


#5

Thankfully we have them from our ex marriages


#6

Our ex r very much involved and caring for the children so I guess that’s a plus


#8

Would u mine telling how old she was when it first came on


#10

#11

So she never recovers the meds haven’t done anything


#12

I totally get that taking the meds seems impossible I’m trying to fight for the hospital to get her on a monthly shot


#13

Our insurance was through her job and now if can’t get her to let me have power of attorney to complete all forms neccassey it will gone this week if I get disability from her job done I’ll have six months


#14

Is this anger toward me and distrust all because of the way I speak she has always complained about my tone and I feel like I’ve done a terrible job so far in keeping her calm


#16

Can I go to work and leave her home so far when I returned she wants me to go and thinks I’m there to harm her even though I say repeatedly as softly as possible that I’m not


#18

Meds can make take almost all symptoms away for some people - the right med anyway. And finding the right med can be quite a challenge. What works for some, doesn’t work for others. It can work for you for years, then stop working. It can look like it works at first - then stop after a few weeks.

My son spent most of the past year just like those videos. He’s on a new drug now & while he’s not completely well, he’s improving and pleasant to be around. He’s no longer paranoid, but he does have problems going out in public sometimes and he still has some of his less troubling delusions.

Since this sounds like it’s fairly new for your wife, please make sure they rule out other things before they slap a paranoid sz diagnosis on her. There are physical problems that can mimic SZ including thyroid issues, certain infections, etc. I don’t have a comprehensive list, but I’m sure one isn’t too hard to find.

The psychiatrists might not be too interested in running all those tests, but a good family doctor or internal medicine doctor might have some ideas.

I’m sorry you’re the center of her paranoia. For my son, it was his father and a few other people - luckily, never me - but I’ve worked hard at developing his trust.

Even though you have no “legal” authority, and if you haven’t already tried this, contact her HR department and act like you have the authority. You might get somewhere - and if you don’t, you’re not any worse off than you already are.

I do all kinds of things for both my husband & my son that I don’t have any legal authority to do - not that they wouldn’t give it. I just act like I do (because I truly believe I should be able to do it) until someone says no. I don’t hear no very often.

You may also be able to ask for a family meeting in the hospital even if she hasn’t signed the form that allows them to talk to you.

By the way, I mentioned my son was like those videos for a lot of the last year. It took 5 involuntary hospitals, enough non-compliance to get him on Invega Sustenna, and then to have the Invega Sustenna fail enough times to get him on another drug - but along the way, he became compliant and is doing well.


#19

I’ve been living this hell for years,I’m gonna post an update in a minute. I’ve tried to,get help but I live in the fucked up state of NH where the mentally ill are treated like dogs. I pray just to get thru everyday.


#20

Thank you so much for reply
Does it seem on the long end of time that I let her remain in the psychosis "1 month " FEP
I read that more time in psychosis means more relapse throughout lifespan and so scared that I really did the wrong thing but letting her talk me into coming home . Mostly feeling selfish for wanting her home before the recovery was further along . She is a psychotherapist so she knows just what to say and I also feel like I was coaching her to sound better .I really just didn’t know and feel as if so far I’ve done everything g wrong


#21

You haven’t done anything wrong. If you had known the most supportive thing to do, you would have done it. None of us can know what will work in advance and you did your best.

One month is not a long psychosis when it comes to treatment working well.


#22

Thanks @Hereandhere
Just came from visit she says I’m scary and a bad person she doesn’t want to c me .Am I doing the wrong thing by showing up even when she want to me it seems like my :grinning: Makes reinforces her bad feelings about me I’m so confused and So damn sad
It’s really hard to say or do anything without it feeling like it bad choice .maybe I should not visit in hospital and just wait till the paranoia and pycosis is under control


#23

Well, since she says she doesn’t want to see you and that she does want to see you, that is very confusing.

Depending on how difficult it was to get there, if it were easy, I might go and ask the nurse to ask my family member if they wish to see me. I would not go back unless they said yes.

If the hospital were far away, I would call and ask if they wanted a visit.

Or I might write a letter and say, I really want to see you. Please let me know when you want me to visit.

Are you allowed to bring her or mail her anything that she needs or likes? Clothing, food, a magazine? That is a good way to stay in contact even if you don’t see each other for even a few days.

It might be good to take some time off for your own sake. I like the idea of waiting until the paranoia and psychosis diminish.


#24

Yes it’s close enough to go everyday the only hard is getting there with losing time at work but you’re right I will just leave her notes each time I go with some things she might like thank you for that and I hope that once the psychosis does diminish that she will be asking for me. In anyone else a experience once the psychosis does diminish do all those crazy ideas and feelings about others just disappear with the psychosis or do they linger like resentments .I ask because I feel when I’ve about thing from a certain prespective for a long time I tend to believe it as truth even if I might be wrong or at least the feelings are as such “I think”


#25

In my experience, the meds make the paranoia go first. Then delusions lesson but linger.

I’m sure everyone is different though.


#26

I do hope your wife has had a thorough medical and neurological evaluation. A first episode psychosis at her age is quite rare, and such symptoms more often are caused by medical or neurological disorders.