Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

My dad is relapsing and dont know what to do


#1

My dad went through a schizophrenic episode probably 15 years ago… ( i was young ) … i think he got medication and … fast forward 15 years(not any significant episodes)

I think he’s been under a load of stress with our little dog almost dying(was a lot of emotions in the family from my mother just absolutely freaking out about it)

Past couple weeks he’s withdrawn to the shed to smoke cigarettes all day. And i went in there yesterday and there was 2 big bottles of rum in the trash. I decided to sneak around his room looking for medication and found tramadol. I knew he would drink rum and cokes but i think he’s drinking significantly more(he never looked drunk to me… But when i seen the bottles in the trash that shocked me)…He’s acting really irritable and wont give me much time to talk or anything. I dont know when to consider this a crisis … But my gut feeling is telling me its getting close. Today was something new at 9am in the morning he had the air compressor running nonstop all day. I went out to see what was going on. And he says it makes him feel better.(he’s deaf)… Im soo afraid on how to handle this… I feel like he’s going to think i betrayed him or something… Is there something i can try to firmly pursuade him. Your not supposed to bring up the illness with them right?

Have any of you called 911 on a loved one to get them help even tho they werent violent? Did you tell them before hand? Or did you just keep it a secret

I 'm desperately looking for like crisis teams in my area but i dont think there is any.

Is there SOME way i can get him to tell me when he THINKS we should do something?
I think that would help me with 2 things… If he doesnt give me a rational answer i know that hes not capible of making decisions on his own… Or …


#2

Hi. Sorry to hear of what you’re going through. This is a good place to be right now.
It sounds like for 15 years, he was doing okay? Did he receive a diagnosis of schizophrenia those years ago?

There are things you can do to get you started. Look for NAMI in your area. They are a good organization for resources while you’re trying to get your bearings.

Caregivers usually know the warning signs before a crisis, so don’t ignore your instincts.

Where are you located?

Hang in there. You’re not alone. Read through these forums - lots of experience from folks you won’t find anywhere else.


#3

Dear Notradger
Safety for you and your family needs to be first. You should talk to the local authorities, so they are aware and may suggest the best way to address the situation.
Please be careful, AnnieNorCal


#4

Thx for the response… I don’t think violence or a potential for violence is there yet… He never had a history of violence or being violent…

How do i deal with this extreme guilt of calling the police on him… I dont know what it is… Im just so afraid he’s going to look at me like you betrayed me.

Have you dealt with that before? If so. how did your loved one react when he got released…


#5

We called mobile crisis on my son and he wasn’t happy about it. They wouldn’t take him. They really dropped the ball because only a couple weeks later my son got on his bike, rode 14 miles to a rifle range and tried to walk in front of targets where LIVE ammunition was being FIRED by retired New York State troopers engaging in a shooting competition! Then and only then did the authorities take our family’s concerns seriously…as the police had accompanied mobile crisis a couple weeks prior. He was then admitted as an involuntary patient for 2.5 weeks into the hospital. His paranoia was off the charts, he wouldn’t allow me to visit him, he wouldn’t take my calls. He was discharged [unsafely] to a homeless shelter (his paranoia prevented him from wanting to come home to us and the psychiatrists refused to see this that as a major symptom/facet of his illness!) with no medication management. When a person on antipsychotics stops taking their meds it can cause an episode of psychosis even worse than the one that precipitated the prescribing of those meds to begin with. So my son was on the streets for 2 days, never went to the homeless shelter, and ended up in a car crash (he stole a car, probably voices telling him to do it, he has no recollection of the accident whatsoever). He ended up back in the hospital for 5 days, then in jail for 75 days, then in an inpatient rehab for 2.5 months, is now in a group home with other mentally ill people. He is going to enter into a plea deal at court soon, and will have to do 45 more days in jail. Your father may feel betrayed at first, and he may not even speak to you for months (which is what happened with me with my son)…but he will eventually come around when he is back on his meds properly (my son came around too)…You have to do what’s right - even if its so difficult - you’d never forgive yourself if your inaction resulted in a tragedy. …I have to add…the fact that YOU are even going to TRY to get your father help, doesn’t necessarily mean he will necessarily GET the help…we tried for weeks and weeks before my son nearly ended up killed on the rifle range…we advocated for him once again while in the hospital and that was also an excercise in futility - but we tried. He nearly got himself killed for the 2nd time in that car crash after being unsafely discharged…but we know in our hearts we, the family, tried. My son will be going back to jail, and the psychiatrist who so carelessly discharged my son gets to go on with her life, business as usual.