New Burnt Out Member

Hi Everyone, it’s late at night and I just dealt with state police at my door because my schizophrenic mom decided to call them once again because my almost 2 yr old was crying during bedtime. I feel so frustrated. She is constantly calling the police and she knows they won’t take her as long as she isn’t a harm to herself or others. She calls them to tell them about the people who are following her and making her sick and they never do anything to help her. It’s gotten to the point that everything that happens is those people. If your shoe is too tight it’s those people. My daughters toy battery stopped working it’s the people. I feel so tired. No one in my family helps and I love her and I want to be here for her but I’m so done. Sometimes I just wish I could never come back to my house just not to deal with her. Ever since I’ve had my daughter I feel like it’s just another trigger for her. She takes her meds, but I have to be so careful with that when talking to the doctor because if I push too much or I say too much she won’t drink it. She is currently on seroquel only 300, but I feel it does nothing for her psychosis. She refuses to believe anything Is wrong with her. My husband (we’ve been married only 2 yrs) is very frustrated with the whole situation and I don’t blame him. I need a brake but how do I take one. Just a guilty feeling tired daughter.

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Welcome Grinexdoor, so sorry you were up late dealing with the state police at your door. Many of us have been in your shoes One night years ago, the sheriff’s office called me late asking me to stop my son from calling 911. My son had given them my number and was quite pleased that they had called me in response to his plea for help. He had called them complaining that we were sexually abusing him through a video game he was playing. A break is always a good idea, take care of yourself and your family.

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Thanks for listening.

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I often took breaks when my daughter was in active psychosis. I had two girlfriends who let me come to stay overnight at their places once in awhile. One even gave me a key so I could just show up and go into her extra room for the night. Once I went to Arizona for 5 days to see my sister without telling my daughter. It always came out OK when I got back.

Thankfully, eventually through the right meds and home management the psychosis ended and my daughter got a new life (job, friends, etc.) Not everyone is as lucky as we are. It took years though.

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I can’t imagine how hard it must be for you to be caring for your young daughter and also taking care of your mother. I remember how utterly exhausted I was when my kids were that young, and the thought of also dealing with a loved one experiencing psychosis on top of that level of motherhood exhaustion makes me feel like I’d need a break too.
My thoughts are with you as you navigate this incredibly difficult situation. I’m sure you’re doing such an incredible job, even with how burnt out and at your wits end you must be.

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There is always one caretaker, and unfortunately its you. Perhaps you can see if she can get into a group home that is supervised? Does she get disability, if not, look into that.
Good luck!

What a difficult situation. You love your Mom but her actions are destructive. How can you put boundaries on this to keep yourself, husband and daughter safe and sane?

Have you made contact with NAMI in your area? You can learn about it on nami.org. I had great support from a NAMI person when my daughter was going through psychosis.

Read “I’m not sick, I don’t need help.” by Dr. Amador.

But the biggest thing is to get the support you need. DO NOT do it alone. Are there any other family members who can be involved?

You mentioned she’s on medication. So I assume she has a psychiatrist? It’s important that you advocate for your mother as it sounds like she needs a different medication.

Navigating through a person’s psychosis is hard and emotionally exhausting. She needs help BUT you need to take care of yourself. NAMI has family support groups and classes.

Also having a personal therapist to work through issues can help.
YOU can do it! It’s hard but with the right support for yourself & family and your Mom I pray that things will get better.