I have been going out of my own sense of what is right anymore. I waa forced to sell the house by my “family”. I was very depressed and started taking anxiety meds. My fiance startred one of his many episodes and went bezerk when I was driving. He started punching me in my arm and when I pulled over and jumped out he grabbed me and drove my car. We had no where to go and no one cared. I callsd the police and they told me he could be arrested and apend 6 montha in jail before he would be hospitalized. What would that do. So we stayed in the car and motels for a month. A family member (not immediate) helped ua find an apartment which isn’t eaay and here it starta again. Bad hygiene, bot eating, talking to people wjo are not there, living in the past, hp all night and cat naps during the day. We have only been here for almost 6 days amd i pray we don’t get kicked oiut. I am not even done moving in. I dont have my diahes, pota pans etc. Too heavy for me. i had mivers but they charge by the hour and i wanted ny bedand couch first. My fiance was supposed to help ne with the rest but taking to invisible people is more important. There is bo one else who can help if i ask him to leave he doesn’t even havea car anymore. I leave to go to the store and when i get back he is telking me that ^“they” are punping gas into the apartment to mess him up and that he can snell it. He smokes ib a non smoking 'complex abd rarely conea out ofhis bathroom or room i am physically and mentally drained The verbal abuse, physical and mind games. He asked me the other day if i was hungry and I said very. He asked me if i wanted fish and cheese. I was like what and asked what that was and he said nevermind. He doesn’t make sense its after 2am and now he decided to move dresser drawers around and talk and im exhausted from doing everything else. He rested moat of the day because when i came back from thr store he was snoring. I wish for a miracle where he would get the help he needs without jail and for little piece and quiet!!
I have been diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder and paranoid schizophrenia. I have to say that putting your husband in jail until he gets proper treatment isn’t necessarily a bad thing to do if he’s ever dangerous or violent. He won’t improve without treatment. I’ve been committed in the past. I didn’t enjoy myself but deep down I knew I needed to be there. I’ve never been violent so I don’t relate to that but I do think once he’s on the right meds and he’s stable, he’ll be able to forgive you for having him locked up
Laz,
Sorry for what you are going thru. Your fiancé definitely needs treatment and it’s not ok for you to be abused. As they say, you must take care of yourself first before you can take care of anyone else. Because our MI person often does not want to get treatment, I find bargaining a necessary evil - maybe you can convince him to get treatment rather than faced with jail. If he becomes a danger to self or other, have info on hand to call crisis intervention and perhaps they will involuntarily put in hospital for treatment.
A lot has happened in our lives also. My 25 year old son has SZA. He has been off and on meds this year. Had been on Invega injection since 2016 but was hospitalized twice in Jan 2021 and dr changed meds to another injectable, then son convinced nurse practitioner to change to pills, then he stopped taking. He survived self inflicted rifle wound in July. Has been on streets since early Sept. Found a semi independent care home for him since he does not want to live with us and we need the break from him, but he refused to go. Ended up stealing our vehicle, needed hospital treatment before could take to jail. Was released to streets. Caused disturbance in grocery store a few days later. Involuntarily hospitalized. Petitioned court for release and was released even though had no place to go, no job, no ID, car/DL etc. Just clothes on his back. Last Friday picked up for criminal trespass. Wants me to bail him out but I’m refusing. His life is out of control and I’ve come to the realization that helping him is not helping. All this started in 2015, and I and worn out, beside myself, feel like he keeps falling thru the cracks. He is not cooperative to do what’s best for him. Someone has to do something different - he is not going to change willingly - having to let him experience the consequences of his actions so maybe he will change. I hate this disease more than anything and just want my son to have a typical life. A bright note - I think his disability will be approved soon so will have some money of his own to provide his own housing etc. I’m hanging on and hoping for better days.
Wishing you the best and remember to take care of you.
I am so glad you have the strength and conviction. I am a mess. I jumped for him for years and im too worn out. Everything I ask him not to do he does even more and he jost wants to eat sugary foods, smoke cigarettes and scream his head off especially late at night. Hes not tired…he does nothing but talk to himself. Today he put pictures of my grandparents and great grandparents on his wall. I saw him talking to the pictures today. He barely talks to me anymore except to call me names or put me down. He wants total control. He spends all day in his room talking to himself about God and he bible…Im not an expert but I know that what he is saying is definitely not on the bible. I asked him to show me where and he just talks over me. I dont even think he can hear me anymore. The voices are taking over. But when he wants something I supposed to jump. When he runs out of cigarettes he will just grab mine so i am going to lock mine up. I tired of a one way street, I did that with my family…now him too. I took care of everyone and there is no one for me