Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

Struggling this month

In early July I relapsed and started seeing translucent figures who sat on me at night and made it difficult for me to move. I called the doctor the next morning and am on Olanzapine now, but I still seem to have some mild symptoms like not being able to get out of certain thought patterns. I feel like snacking or napping the entire day since starting Olanzapine and haven’t been able to do any of the things I usually do like help with house chores and gardening, cleaning house for my mom’s boss, and going jogging. The dishes pile up in the sink often. It’s been two weeks on Olanzapine and my doctor just called saying we’ll go down to half the dose and see if eventually Saphris alone will help. I don’t think that will work but I will do as he says. I wanted to work my way up to weekly volunteering and losing some weight or maybe doing some paid housecleaning for my mom. Idk, I’m already feeling slightly more psychotic and I haven’t taken my nighttime dose yet. My mom leaves for a month between this Thursday and mid August so I won’t have that support system if I get more psychosis. It feels like there’s some horror stuff lying in wait around the corner and I really want a break where I can be free of all this one day and not be someone my parents have to worry about. My mom talks more often now about leaving me the houses and taking care of myself after they pass. I turn 30 in two weeks, will go out for sushi with friends if my mental health holds up, and my mom is starting to act like I’ve missed my chance to marry but maybe there’s still a chance. My friends online sort of make me call my doctor when they see that I start posting weird content, which has happened many times by now. I really hope I get past this stage and am able to move on to a more free life one day. Today I did attend support group and got a group email about an in person or online 8 week nami event for peers. I did go out with my mom in June and bought some new clothes and things were going well till I relapsed. There is a nami 8 week group for family that my mom attended when I first moved home after withdrawing from grad school due to psychosis. It sort of transitioned her gradually to the fact that I wasn’t going to be a lawyer or doctor. But 2021 is not my year so maybe it’s best if I take it easy. My parents are building a second house and say their permit should be approved soon. I want to get away from real life and hear some stories like NHK shows about the Japanese countryside… forget about the life I live today.

Hi @Tukey, were you able to sign up for the NAMI event for peers? I’ve taken the 10 week program for family. It was of great help when I really needed it. I’m not familiar with NHK shows so I looked them up and just watched a short video on paper making. I’m looking forward to watching more tomorrow. I hope you’re doing better.

Hello @Turkey
Please stay hopeful
There are many resources and people willing to help
My daughter is 40 and has had Schizoaffective Disorder since age 28. Her journey has been difficult but we are very close and I try to understand and support her
I’m glad your Mom took the Family NAMI course. I did also. I’ve found the Podcast Inside Schizophrenia with Rachel Star Withers (she has SZ) and Gabe Howard (he has Bipolar) very helpful and I’ve learned so much. I want my daughter to listen
Also the website Psych Central has been beneficial
I hope you feel better soon
Maureen