Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

This board is not helpful to me

Not sure why but I have received little to no support from this board. I have posted several times only to receive short and snide responses.

LOL, I do that, but not in your case, You have made a total of 4 post including this one… you got pretty good response, what are you looking for? a miracle that dont exist?

Your boyfriend post got responses you did not want to here…

You got a great response on your Abilify post, it runned my wife for life…

In your alcohol post, it is clear you need to move on from your BF, when they shoot pills its over for most…

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I’ll give you an Abilify vid, tremors for life:

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I’m glad you find this funny. And what do you mean responses I didn’t want to hear?

I’ve read alot on this board. I see alot of people who respond with more than a short paragraph on “glad you’re moving on”.

I dont want a miracle. I want someone who will relate to what I’m going through. A very painful break up and worrying he might be dead.

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Hi susan031367,

I’m sorry you have felt unsupported by this forum. Our lives here on the forum can be tricky from time to time as we can suddenly become quite involved helping our family members. I think one of the best ways to use the forum is by way of the search option at the upper right on your screen.

Reading a lot of information that has already been posted on the forum is a really good way to get to know the forum members (we can be a quirky group) and gain valuable information.

Often a person may be looking for specific information that has already been covered in depth in other threads. The old threads are tremendous resources.

Our forum members can be absent for a period of time because they are either taking a break from the forum and everyone else’s struggles, or, sometimes things are going so well in their lives that they don’t check in as often.

You will see a variety of different kinds of responses on the forum. People take different approaches to their family’s concerns. Personally, I like it best when I get different responses and I can figure out which one might work for me.

The people on this forum can help you. A lot of the information you want may already be here. Readng those old threads may help you decide which of us you would prefer to ignore - and I mean that in the nicest way possible. Some of our forum members have dealt with more scz in their lives than can be imagined.

Take care, hope

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Give it 25-30 years and you will find it funny too…

Yep, not easy for anyone, for sure, you will get past it some day…

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you got that right, this forum is depressing and takes a hell of alot of out of you…

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Thank you. Honestly I like the posts where people talk about how sad it makes them feel. Dealing with the illness in someone they love. I just really dont have anybody. My friends dont know what to say.

We have a really good thread that I like to visit when I am sad - let me find it for you.

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I’m sorry that you haven’t felt supported, the problem is (I think) that not everyone does relate to what any of us post on any given day, I would not view that personally, I have been on this forum for a few years and sometimes I get a lot of good support and sometimes I get nothing. I do know from the time I have spent here there are a lot of good people here going through similar situations, maybe not like your own (or my own) but different. Many times (as wordy as I can be) I can’t find the right words to respond to somebody. I will look for your posts and see if there is anything I can relate to and respond as best as I can. I wish you well.

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This is my happy thread… a very long one, good vids at front end… started it over two years ago

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LOL, I have two very sick med resistant SZs, my daughter was born with the shit from her mother, my wife of 30 years… many think they have it bad, LOL…

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How to deal with my sadness of my sons schizophrenia

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over 21,000 views…

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Short posts with little to no useful or actionable information, don’t give people much to respond to.

Elicited little response, because most everyone with a boyfriend posting here has a similar story. If you open up and get more specific, you might get more support.

I have no idea who Jay is from this post, I assume your boyfriend given other posts. While sad to hear, you don’t give the forum a call to action here. When people blurt out personal information inappropriately at random without context or purpose, they tend to get ignored. Sorry. It’s what I might do if a bag lady blurted the same out on a street corner. I might even cross to the other side of the street.

As the not short nor particularly snide reply for this forum states, Abilify is a common medication for schizophrenia. It’s also common for schizoaffective and bipolar disorders, dementia and as an add-on for antidepressants. There are dozens if not hundreds or thousands of threads where this medication is discussed. I’ve participated in some of them. What you learn quickly is everyone’s experience is different. @GSSP’s wife had a particularly bad reaction to it, while others (my father included for dementia) have had more positive or neutral results. If you have a specific question ask away, but in this forum it’s a bit like asking “do any of you drink water and like breathing regularly? Or drink either Coke or Pepsi?” If you asked these questions of passerby’s on the street you shouldn’t be surprised that the reaction may muted or have an undertone of “well, duh.”

I believe you also posted your email address in the forum unsolicited which isn’t done here much. Some, myself included, are private about their situations and avoid personal disclosures or exchanges of email addresses. There’s a private messaging feature of the forum that’s a bit more private than exchanging email addresses or posting phone numbers on proverbial bathroom walls.

I’m sorry you didn’t get the reaction you’d like out of the forum. If you work on understanding conventions of how the forum operates, and ask meaningful questions rather than making non-sequitor statements, you may get better responses and more support.

Sorry to be blunt, but since you didn’t seem to understand why you got these reactions, I felt I had to spell it out. @GSSP is blunt and sometimes flippant, but he has a right to be. The reality is many people here need to toughen up if they want to be effective caregivers, and if not, whether they want to hear it or not, might be better off to heed his advice and run far far away.

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Poor lady. My son was placed on Abilify during his first hospital stay. He got horrible TDK. That whole experience convinced him antipsychotic s damage his brain. The Abili by p!us Haldol was really horrible for him. So now he will only take Zyprexia when court ordered. Currently he is doing pretty well on a protein rich diet and some supplement s

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@susan031367 I noticed your posts didn’t have any responses so I replied to your posts. This board can be very supportive and I think if you shared a bit more and responded when others post responses to your questions that would help you feel more connected. Also, NAMI is a great support group to attend in your local area. Many are meeting virtually. I hope you will look into that so you can get some support offline. And it’s taken me a long to realize that it is nearly impossible to have a healthy relationship with someone who suffers from a SMI and refuses to make staying in treatment a priority. Dual diagnosis of SMI plus substance abuse only complicates matters. @GSSP was right in it is very expensive to do certain things to help a love one. Depending on the state you live in you could try to get guardianship or conservatorship over your bf. Most of the time an attorney is needed to do this. Other people posted about getting heir drivers license restricted or flagged where a psychiatrist has to sign off saying they are adhering to their treatment plan. @Maggotbrane has posted a lot on this board with a lot of insight from a different perspective and has that noted on each post. I find the posts very helpful. I also think that given you are now sober your health should be your priority and you wouldn’t want to relapse due to the stress of your relationship with your bf. A lot of caregivers on here see a therapist regularly to help cope with all the challenges they face. I hope you are feeling more supported.

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@Maggotbrane Thanks for your cold and calculated response. I dont need you to post all of my posts and defend the reasons why I got little response. I think you need more to do.

I’ll turn this around. You have not been helpful, nor patient, nor respectful to this board.

I take pains to invest time to help people here and point out things that they might not have considered, and generally people appreciate me taking the time for detailed and considered answers they might not get elsewhere.

This is a place to get help, support and answers. If you just want to vent and have temper tantrums, and have your behavior validated, I’m sorry to say—for all my efforts—I can’t help you.

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