Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

Today is another horrible day


#1

I posted a couple of weeks ago about my brother and his pyschosis
Everyday has been horrible since then, he is still completely delusional… he does snap out of it and act normal for maybe a few hours a day
Current meds are 150mg serequel in the morning 100mg serequel at lunch and then 20mg Zyprexa at night with 150mg Effexor and 45mg mirtazapine to sleep.
He is still verbally abusing me and my parents everyday, he still believes all his delusions but clearly thinks they are reality. I have the worst anxiety from seeing him this way and not being able to make things better for him and my family. I have spoken to his psychiatrist about it but he can’t give me too much advice because he hasn’t actually seen him in this way. The only thing I have been told is to call an ambulance if he gets very bad… but what’s very bad? I don’t want to do that to him I’m scared he’ll hate me even more, then what if he presents well there and they send him home and don’t see his delusional state. I’m so so stuck and scared for what’s to come… I’ve been reading so many posts on thi forum and people are taking medications that I haven’t heard of… maybe the injections are better? I have no idea. He doesn’t think he is sick he just thinks we aren’t letting him live this delusional life he believes he has. This forum has been my only hope I just sit on here reading about what people are going through sometimes it makes me feel better but other times scares me even more. Please someone give me some insight as to what I can do… life is honestly becoming unbearable… home is the worst place to be right now, I have 3 kids and a husband that I have to care for and act ‘normal’ but inside I’m dying that my only brother is suffering my parents are suffering watching him. How do people handle living like this ??? I just want to find him a cure but I can’t do this without him cooperating I guess…


#2

Especially with children in the home, they become the priority in terms of their safety. You (and your parents and any other adult family) could really benefit from a NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) Family Support Group and, when and where offered, their Family-to-Family class. Is there one in your area? (NAMI.org)

Go to the Treatment Advocacy Center website and look up the law in your state for having someone committed involuntarily to a mental health hospital. Here is a link to the NAMI Helpline info and their “What to do in a crisis” info. https://www.nami.org/Find-Support/NAMI-HelpLine


#3

I just replied to your original email. I have become thoroughly familiar with all of this and have experienced all you are going through. If you would like to hear more from me, I think I can answer a lot of your questions. We have been dealing with this for 3+ years and I have been a very active advocate for my son and I’ve insisted every dr. he sees meet with me and treat my son accordingly in view of added information and insight into my child’s actual behavior. I will be glad to communicate with you directly if you want to initiate that. I don’t have all of the answers but I know a lot.


#4

Hi Rosie
Thank you so much for your reply I’d really appreciate that I have so many questions but don’t know where to start… I’m fairly new to this so just dealing with it all on a daily basis is hard enough… I just feel as though this is my life forever and there is no light at the end of the tunnel :sob:


#5

Thank you I will be getting onto it on Monday… I just don’t want to make him think that we are against him I’m scared if I call a emergency services he will never forgive or trust me


#6

I am so sorry that your family is going through you brother’s illness. This is an illness that hurts everyone involved while, often, the person who is ill doesn’t know that they are ill. I had absolutely no idea what delusions and hallucinations even were until my daughter lost her job, moved in with me, and I slowly realized her behaviors were NOT her choice. It’s been 2.5 years now, and she remains unmedicated and delusional, talking to her voices most of her day. Depending on your brother’s age, (under or over 18), sometimes actions are very limited in getting an adult into care. It is so, so heartbreaking to watch the demise of another’s mental state, but your first priority is to keep yourself and your family safe. Then, try to help your brother. If he is under 18, your parents should do everything they can to get him committed and onto medication while they still have the power to do so.

NAMI is a good support system. The book “I am not sick, I don’t need help” by Dr. Amador gives advice that can be used for anyone facing anosognosia (lack of insight) by their mentally ill loved one.

Fear of calling the police is normal, but involuntary commitment in my state necessitated my using the system that exists for mental illness. She was committed 4 times. However, it is not necessarily going to cure the situation, as your brother might not stay on his meds (common situation) which is what my adult daughter did (got off meds as soon as released).

Keep coming on this forum, it is a great help.

You have to do what you think you have to do, especially if there is any danger of harm to you, your parents or of your brother harming himself.


#7

Gth are you maybe taking too much on yourself? There are time when I have to rely on the 3 C’s of caregiving to give myself some balance. You didn’t Cause it, you can’t Control it, and you can’t Cure it. From what I understand, those are borrowed from Al-Anon, but they apply to our situations as well.

You CAN learn to Cope with it, while coping doesn’t sound much compared to the 3 C’s, it is so much better than not coping. We all struggle to get to where we can cope with their illness.

Do I understand it correctly that you and your husband and your 3 children live with your parents and your brother?