When your son believes you are responsible for inapropriate actions

3 years ago my 23 year old son sent me an email from his brothers house (he actually flew across Canada for this visit). The email contained several accusations, mainly that I had posted naked pictures of him on the internet and also sent inappropriate pictures of myself to his high school friends, I WAS SHOCKED AND HORRIFIED. This was the first time I knew that he was “sick”, it was a hard pill to swallow, he returned home and we checked him into a hospital. The hardest part of this journey is knowing that to this day he still believes that I did these things, but he appears to “forgive me”, which does not give me much comfort. This is NOT about me, I will carry this delusional burden although it break my heart that he feels I would ever do him harm. Has any-one else experienced this?

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Hello, I know very well how much it hurts for your child to feel that you harmed them or did something inappropriate to them. I have experienced this just in a different form. My son believes I gave him antipsychotics to harm him, place him in a medical induced holding by sedating him with the medications, and the medications that I gave him caused him to become ill and I did this all on purpose to ruin his life. It really hurts. I go along with the delusion and asked him to forgive me to have some type of relationship with him. I pray everyday that these thoughts are removed from his mind. I know it’s difficult. I keep reminding myself of the truth.

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Yes, in some form or another, delusions of our loved ones have affected the caregivers’ lives. It is very unfortunate that the severe mental illness often causes those afflicted to verbally turn on their closest family member. You are doing the right thing by NOT arguing with your son’s delusional memories.

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Thank-you for the reply, It is heartbreaking, I hope someday they see that we are on their side… Best, Jade

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