Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

Cannot come to terms


Tonight I am surfing old posts, it helps me when I am stressed and cannot sleep. Perhaps I should instead wake my husband to talk @Squid . I don’t do that anymore. This thread in particular I have read top to bottom as almost every prior post hits close to home for me. I am sad yet hopeful as potential recovery hangs in a thread tonight: will my daughter take her 2nd shot tomorrow? Since she didn’t get it on time I have been watching the slow decline in her. We were able to go out and play pool together tonight. It was very fun and I just ignored it when she spoke to her people aloud. My own sanity has been going up and down to a degree that it is hard for me to take as I worry and then relax. My husband wants closeness and I just withdraw. I come here to this forum because it is the only place I can understand and be understood. It is a lifeline. I wanted to bump this up, because coming to terms is so very very hard.


@oldladyblue, I will be thinking of you and your daughter today While my family doesn’t live with the will-they-won’t-they of injections, that idea of potential recovery hanging on a thread is familiar. I’m hoping she will take it and continue to agree and each time it will get a little easier for her to realize that it helps. Hang in there.


My daughter is a senior in high school and I find myself worrying about her future… knowing how much stress high school gives her, I am sure she is not ready for college, unless she takes some correspondence course done at her own pace… She is fascinated by watches and there might be a slight possibility for an apprenticeship with a watch maker. I could see her doing well with hands on learning rather than traditional college courses. If she would go to college, it would for Art major.
She doesn’t have her driver’s license yet and I am not sure if she will ready for that any time soon. So it will be hard for her to get a job if she can’t drive to it… and sometimes I wonder if she will be able to hold on to a job. She did fairly well working at a summer camp this past summer even though she didn’t get the job she wanted, taking care of the horses. It was a struggle for her but she did manage to hold on through most of the summer, although not the whole time she was supposed to. The camp actually called us concerned for her physical and emotional and this is when she opened up to what she has been struggling with and that she could have a mental illness.
She is also very artistic and loves making this real nice stuffed art dolls and has considered selling them on Etsy… the problem is that she had so many ideas that she would love to do, that she had no idea which one to pursue, and sometimes thinking about gives her a panic attack.


I can’t even imagine myself driving in Los Angelos!
But for my daughter, even in a small town I am nervous about her driving.


If your daughter has insight, there can be a lot of supports in place for her if she chooses to go to college. I think you are right to support her in making choices that work best for her and just taking it slow.

In “this day and age”, there are so many ride options, she may not need to drive. If a person isn’t paying for gas, car payments and service, the cost of Uber or Lyft doesn’t seem so bad! I bet there are even ways to work out agreements to get a regular pickup/dropoff schedule. I recently heard about new services being set up for providing transportation for kids whose parents work. Something along those lines might be suitable.


I have not done this but my friend does and she also takes/took her daughter here for psychotherapy for attachment issues. This is therapy with horses. I believe you don’t even get on the horse. Your daughter may find this helpful for anxiety…

Maybe you can find something like this close to you.


Hippotherapy! It can be wonderfully calming. Check to see if the horse community near where you live has anyone practicing this. We are lucky in my town to have a couple of people who are trained- one does riding as physical therapy and one works with people who have anxiety and other disorders.
Since your daughter loves horses, I suspect this will be a good idea for her.


I am an artist. Encourage your loved one to express themselves! My son won’t let me work with him yet, because ‘I am the artist’, but I know it’s very helpful for those who can’t express themselves any other way. I am going to attempt to get him interested in sculpture, I am a painter. The schizoprenics I have encountered are usually extremely gifted in the arts, they just need encouragement to let that creativity flow. Definitely encourage your daughters interest in the arts, no matter what sculpture, drawing, painting, quilting, sewing, etc.!


If she does go to college, she would study art, with an emphasis in textiles… and if she goes, it would be at the same college my son is going to now.


Ooo, textiles! What are her interests??


She makes these beautiful stuffed art dolls… she has made two cats and a dragon… but she also loves to make costumes


I’d love to see, if she would be willing to let you share!


This is the white cat she made… I don’t have any pictures of the dragon…or a black cat she has made recently. She makes these without any pattern!


Oh, that is AWESOME!


LOVE it! A beauty!! Amazing that she can do that without a pattern!


Will she go to FIT? She’s talented.


I am not sure what FIT is


Fashion Institute of Technology in New York City.


We are not even sure if she is ready to go to college at this point… school is her biggest source of anxiety. She is trying to figure out what to do after high school graduation this year, but even thinking about that dan give her anxiety at times… whatever she decides, we will support her.


Hi Annie . You are an inspiration to me and I have only had very few interactions with you via this website and still you give me hope for my situation in terms with finding peace and acceptance among all else.
Like other have said put you first and focus on the things you can control . I think self care in all this seems to get put on the back burner not just when it comes to the MI but as caregivers family and especially mothers etc.
I think you deserve to treat yourself to a spa day and just sorta check out for a while and relax. Sending positive vibes and thoughts your way, Ali