My son has been adamant that today’s date is Feb 22 instead of Feb 12. We’ve had this conversation multiple times since he was dxd in December and admitted to me today that he’s thought the date on the calendar was wrong since last October before he was dxd. He gets so agitated about this thinking whoever did this to the date has to change it. I’m at a loss as to what to tell him and am now thinking his meds aren’t working fully. Any suggestions?
All dates are set 10 days back for some reason? or just today?
I’m very impatient when it comes to meds working, but people keep telling me that it can take up to six months or more for meds to be fully effective, and that the delusions are the very last thing to go, if they ever go away completely.
Have you seen any improvement?
My son’s first doctor advised me to not discuss his delusions with him. To tell him what I thought once, then when he brings it up again, remind him that we’d already talked about it, he knows what I think, then change the subject.
I stuck with that for a long time, but now I’m trying to practice the LEAP method where I practice reflective listening, empathize (it must be confusing or scare to think someone could change time.), agree on something even if it’s agreeing to disagree, then partnering on a solution.
So far, I’m still trying to get the reflective listening down. Empathizing I can do. The agreeing part is harder - and I’m no where near partnering.
To be honest, I think I might take everything concerned with a date out the house if I could, although with electronic devices these days it’s virtually impossible.
It’s difficult to remove the calendar because his injection and psych doc spots are on there. Even his meds are individually wrapped by date by the pharmacy so it’s almost impossible to convince him when his spots are etc. I told him a couple of weeks ago that we have to agree to disagree on this subject.
Replace the word spots with the word appts as my auto correct was overriding.
I would wait and see if the delusion lasts or if it is just a brief episode…my son has been mostly stable for several years but episodes like that can happen off and on anyway…he will insist that something is that is not or that something happened or didn’t happen when it was definitely the opposite. These things can happen briefly (a day or so) …and if the meds have only been since December…it can take several months for them to reach the optimum effectiveness. Maybe try to reassure him that the date will most likely be corrected by tomorrow. Chances are the delusion will pass after a good night’s sleep…at least it does with my son…just a thought.
Thank you both for the great advice and insight! I will hold tight on my concerns with the meds as I see it will take awhile yet.
Half the people in the world are wrong about the date daily, so don’t really worry, it will pass. Just let it be for now.
@slw I never head of LEAP method. I’m going to look it up – sounds like a great way to communicate rather than arguing that it’s not real.
It’s what the “I’m not sick, I don’t need help” book teaches.
It goes against my nature, so I’m struggling with it, but I’ll gradually get there.
Oh, and I never, ever tell my son things aren’t real, although he’s always saying, "you don’t believe me, do you?"
Except for if he says “I am Jesus” or “I am the Devil” - those feel particularly dangerous to me.
Try to find a book “i am not sick. I don’t need help”
I just watched one of Dr Xavier’s talks about using the LEAP technique with my son’s delusion about the date. I have to get the book too. Thanks for the advice!