Hopeless, scared, exhausted and deploying in 3 days

Let’s just say the women I love is the most beautiful, caring ,loving, and most important person to me. She suffers from Schizophrenia of course but functions highly even without meds as long as I am there. She has done very well on her own, while I’ve been away on training. She does all the household arronds by herself and even converses with neighbors,but now I am deploying and she will be alone for a month until family is available for her to stay with. For the last two weeks she has been spiking and it will not stop. Went to the hospital in CA. and was told that they could not help her because it’s voluntary and she is not a danger to herself or others. What is going to happen when I leave in three days she will get worse. This is a broken system and I’m broken before deployment my head isn’t in the game I haven’t even got my gear set up took care of finances started packing or slept in days. I need help and no one at work understands anything. It sucks so bad been in 8 years and I’m at my breaking point. Why is the stigma so bad? You try to talk to someone about it and they act like she is going to kill me in my sleep. Sorry needed to rant. Happy new years help_connection_3rd_ed_5_25.pdf (771.8 KB)

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Hi, Happy New Year. Does she maybe have a nearby friend she can stay with or who can check up on her? What about one of your family members?

Unfortunately no. Her parents passed away right after we graduated high school. She went to Hawaii did the college thing. came home for a bit we got back in contact she joined the Air Force I joined the Navy. Many years later we got back together and developed our relationship. So she moved around and has lost contact with all family. My mom is willing to come out here but she has her own condition and a dying mother to take care of.

First of all I am so sorry for the stress that you and your loved one are under…I don’t understand why the mental health stigma still exists such as it is…mental health should be just as important and just as respected as people who are dealing with any other physical ailment, heart issues, cancer, breathing or anything…we are more than flesh and bones, I know that your mental well being is equally as important as the one you love…so it may be that at some point you might have to talk to a professional within the military if that is possible and let somebody know what you are dealing with and how important your well being and the well being of your loved one is. Loving people with schizophrenia or any serious mental illness sometimes means you have to at some point re-arrange your life, your employment, maybe where you live or the activities you partake in…various things may change or need to change during the course of living with schizophrenia (within a relationship) to create the absolute best environment that the two of you can best flourish in…it;s not easy and it takes time and effort and often sacrifices but I can speak from my experience and say that when you finally reach a successful/happy place…all that went before seems so worth it… I wish you the very best and happiest New Year ahead…and please stay safe where ever you go.

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I understand, I’m very sad to hear that. Perhaps she should join a support group of some kind and make friends there.

I’m so sorry of what you are going through. There is a lot of stigma attached to mi but I hope that eventually with advocacy from NAMI and educating the public the stigma will lessen. It’s better than it was years ago when our loved ones were locked up for years in a mental hospital.

Have you looked into NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness. There are chapters all over the USA to provide support and education to our loved ones and us the people who love them. Here is a ink to the NAMI National website. There are also local chapter websites. I wish you the very best.

Oops, almost forgot the link: Home | NAMI: National Alliance on Mental Illness