Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

How to learn to go with the flow of things?


#1

I have posted on here before but it’s been close to a year since I did. My boyfriend has been really up and down lately. He got a new job about 6 weeks ago (which is great for him) and he was doing ok with it for the first couple of weeks but then he started to show more symptoms, which I knew was probably due to stress from the job. Today, everything was fine this morning (the entire weekend actually) and he was so sweet and loving and then on his break today he just up and quit his job and then went off on me for playing head games completely out of the blue. I know he loves me but his mood changes from minute to minute literally… How do other partners of Sz diagnosed people handle the up and down and the instability and uncertainty that comes with each day?


#2

Thats a tough one, and everyone has to deal with it in different ways. Might help to check online, or check out some books at the library about being a caregiver. My son lives on his own so there is not so much tension.


#3

@AFC110 , i still haven’t figured out how to handle the constant ups and downs. It’s very difficult at times. I think you can only take it one day at a time though. I hope you are doing ok.


#4

I’ve heard some people talk about “detachment with love”. If you can, try to get some distance from your boyfriend’s symptoms. Just say, “it’s the sz”, and try not to let it bother you.


#5

@DesperatelySad - yes, I am doing well thank you. My boyfriend and I had a huge fight about the middle of the week last week and I found the strength inside me to walk away from him in that moment. We are still together and are doing well but I was able to detach from his symptoms and ignore his irrational behavior until he calmed down and that seemed to help both of us. We both now know that if I had to, I could and would leave him if it came down to my well being or his and I think it shifted things for us and helped take away some of the chaotic and toxic aspects of our relationship - at least for now