Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

I am so upset but I know hes where he needs to be

Sorry, I have been upset all day. My better half was mental hygiene arrested last night and I have had no contact with him. I talked to the nurses a few times and they have him isolated because of his behavior. I happened to look ar a video I took of him 1 week ago. It was early in the morning with very little sleep the night before and watching it today i can very clearly see that he was so upset/afraid that someone was going to hurt me or him. My brain knows but my heart is a mess. I have tried to make time for myself but all i can do is think about him

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I know is not easy. But it may help thinking that he has an illness and is in the hospital for treatment. Same way as if he would have any other mayor illness and goes to the hospital for treatment.

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Oh gosh Laz I am so sorry. I just opened your last thread and my phone started to die.
I apologize it looks like nobody was here to respond to you yesterday when you probably needed more support. We’re here. I have to let the phone charge a bit but know you’re not alone! I will check back in shortly…

Thank you. I know and i keep telling myself that and a few minutes later it starts all over again.

Thank you, my sisters and my brother are not speaking to me because of my parents housw where I have lived most of my life and Jerry my better halfnof 42 years live. We dont have the income to buy the house for what they expect and they are being ridiculous over $. I spoke to Jerry about this over a week ago, very calmly, and he was ok with it since he believes our neighbors want to hurt him and me. I have been trying to keep it together for both of our sakes but im falling apart. He hasn’t been doing well for months and has been getting worse. It took 4 police officers to restrain him and he is in an isolated room becuase he was very disrespectful to the staff and other patients is what the nurse told me earlier.

Hi Laz. I’m so sorry again.
First, I think it’s a good sign that the nursing staff are willing to talk to you. There are a lot of places that won’t give out any information at all to somebody who is not immediate family.
As Hopeisahead said too, if he’s in a place where he’s getting medical care, being treated in a fashion that means he won’t be able to harm anybody else, this may just be the start you’ve been looking for headed toward properly addressing his most severe symptoms and the help that we can’t give.
I know it’s heart breaking. All of it. What we endure at home with untreated symptoms, as well as any guilt we may feel when more aggressive action is taken for our loved one to receive treatment. Please don’t harbor any feelings of guilt. I think your friend might have made the best call. This may be the beginning of progress… pray.
I know you’re shaken too by the intensity of the incident. Give yourself time to process it. Cry into your fists. Scream at the sky. Take a hot shower and weep. Do whatever you need to. Nobody is watching and don’t hold it in. Nobody will hold it against you. Then remember to breath. And breath deep. You DO have this! You ARE strong. You are not alone.
I can tell the love you have for him is deep, simply in the fact that your heart breaks to see HIM hurt, even after he has hurt you. But he is where he needs to be for the moment, a place that offers some glimmer of hope, of future for both of you. So let this be your time. For you. To heal.
(I’m not lost to the fact that you’re going to be replacing a front door either… that also sucks.)
It’s your turn to wrap yourself in a warm blanket and feel safe.
Breath. Breath deep.
And get some rest. Sleep.
All thoughts are with you. :hugs:

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Thank you again, your response made me cry because from your words I know that you know!

I did not mean to make you cry, I am sorry. Stay strong, be good to you. No, you’re definitely not alone!

I hear you. I can’t stop thinking about my son either. He’s now unmedicated and is a mess and will likely land in the hospital (I wish) jail or homeless. It’s very distressing. We’re here with you. Hang in there and hopefully your better half will come out on meds and not as scared. Invega sustenna worked for my son for two years until he went off of it. He is paranoid sz with disorganized thinking.

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This is such a horrible disease where they are not aware that they are sick. Other illness the doctor’s tell you and that’s that. My fiance uaed yo he very active and to get to this level is… I don’t even have a word that fits :broken_heart:

I recognize Invega. He took the pill form of it made him hyper and he had to take benadryl to sleep. Then he saw someone on the internet who recommended the best way to get off of meds was to do it very slowly. With that the lying and behavioral problems started and the paranoia and voices took over everything.

Sorry to hear your pain , try and take one day at a time and deal with things as they come . This is how i deal with my sons illness . I am still bribing him to stay on his meds . He went down from Abilify 25mg to 5mg and has been on 5mg for 4 months now . To be honest i can not see much difference from 25 to 5 . I pray every day and i also pray for everybody’s loved ones on this site . I know your pain , i feel your pain and sadness . You will have good days when your loved one is feeling good and you will come across sad days when your loved one is not feeling great and you will learn how to deal with it . I dont really except this disease but i learn how to deal with it the best i can . I educate myself every day about this horrific disease and every day i am a little bit wiser on how to help my son .I hope and pray that your better half will come home medicated and stay medicated for his own piece of mind . :pray:

Thank you. Thank goodness for this site. The nights and first thing in the morning are hard because he’s not here and I sounds selfish of me to wish he was here but better. My family wont talk to me and its just me for now. I hope that I can see him tomorrow but I need to keep it together

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I know that it is hard to relax when your loved one is hospitalized. When this happens to my daughter, I try to take advantage of the respite time. I still think of her constantly but I also focus on some kind of self-care. This may be sleeping late or making a date with a friend etc. Doing something that is difficult when he is there. Don’t feel guilty. You are reviving yourself.

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I’m so sorry for you. I know all the people on this site have been whare you are at one time. You will also learn alot about medication and get lots of support. This is such a devastating disease and can make you feel so alone. I am the only person that my son has. I stress every day that he will go off his meds. My husband passed away in February from covid. We had to put my son in the hospital 4 times. I don’t know if I would be able to do this again. Try and be strong.

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