I'm scared of my son for the first time

[Sheyelo]

I’m genuinely scared for the first time in my life! Meth and mentally ill do not mix! My son moved back in with me when I asked my husband for a divorce. He just got his “meds” from dr on Monday. He has been high ever since.

I woke up this morning and went to kitchen and there was blood everywhere! Then my son rounds the corner and has blood all on his shirt!! Turns out he has been stabbed in the left hand between his thumb and pointer finger. He would not say what happened except that he was trying to open something. Refused to let me take him to er. Then he said his two friends were down at his old house. I went over there and made them leave so they just followed me back up the hill to my house. Of course they said they didn’t know how he got stabbed. Also I had a box of homemade pair preserves in my laundry room that had been knocked off and all broke in the floor. Again no one knows how that happened.

His friend told me my son was shooting up meth. And his friend convinced him to give me the needle. But not till after he shot up again. I locked myself in my room just trying to stay out of the way.

But the more I thought about it the madder I got so I confronted him again about shooting up and said how it made me feel and that he scared me for the first time ever!! His response…you should be scared! I do have that on recording.

Then his real dad called to check on him and see how he was doing since he had gotten out of hospital Monday bf last. After hearing what was going on, he is now on his way here from Panama City. And he told all of them over the phone they better not be here when he gets here. They have all left now.

My locks are getting changed tonight. I don’t know what I’m dealing with when it comes to meth!! Pot I can deal with cuz it’s something I know and understand from my younger years. But not meth or heroine!

I’m scared. Now not just for my sons life but my own as well!! My son deals with enough being bpd and sz without added meth to the mix!!

[Doctor]

Get him hospitalized immediately. My fiancé was on meth a few months ago and it got really bad. Always call the police if you see blood or anything that is dangerous to himself and you as well.

[slw]

As bad as heroin is, it would probably be way safer for someone with psychosis than meth.

With heroin, he’d probably just nod off and go to sleep for awhile. I think most heroin addicts get violent to get more money to get the drugs, not because the heroin itself makes them that way. If I’ve ever known anyone personally who was on heroin, I didn’t know about it - but I have heard “friend of a friend” stories.

Meth, on the other hand, is very different and can make people have psychosis all on its own - and it can put people on edge and make them angry. I used to know a lot of people back in the day who would snort meth, a few who would smoke it - never knew anyone who shot it up. I don’t want to scare you anymore than you already are, but that’s pretty hardcore in my book.

Hopefully, his dad gets there soon and you guys can come up with a plan. I’d be scared too - for him as well as of him.

[Hereandhere]

I’m so sorry you’re going through this.

[Molly]

Meth is very dangerous and unpredictable. Think about calling the police when your son is high on meth. Good people on meth can do very bad things.

[Sheyelo]

I just wish I knew exactly what happened! I mean did he do it to himself or did one of his two friends that were over here?

[Sheyelo]

Just been sitting here in the quiet praying. Waiting on his dad to get here. They are all still gone. Thankfully! But I’m still worried!

His dad said we can go to courthouse and speak to judge and let him hear the recording and tell him I’m afraid and they will give me guardianship. I don’t think it works like that. Plus I don’t want him in jail. I want him in a dual treatment center of which there are none around here.

I’m so worried about him!

[slw]

If they weren’t fighting about it when you were talking to then, I wouldn’t worry about his hand so much as the meth.

Boys, even when they don’t have a MI or drugs, do dumb stuff. Unless I wanted to make it an excuse to get him to the hospital, I’d let that one go.

[Sheyelo]

That’s the problem. I don’t know if they were fighting. My son, 32, would cover for his friend anyway. It’s a violent relationship and my son catches the brunt of the anger. But he says he loves him and if he is not around then he will cease to exist. Another reference to suicide!

[Sheyelo]

How do I do that if he won’t agree to go?

[slw]

You’re scared - so that’s a danger to you.
He’s hurt and won’t accept treatment - that’s not able to protect himself from harm, maybe a danger to himself.

That would work in my state anyway.

Here, I can call the crisis line and ask for advice or suggestions even if I don’t ask for someone to come out. If someone comes out, the police will do the transport to the hospital, and I don’t like that part. My son’s last hospitalization, he wanted to go wait for his therapist to show up. I told him that if she wasn’t there to ask for crisis - he did, and they did an involuntary hold on him because they said he was acutely psychotic (very true) and he was not capable of consenting.

The police did transport him, but they were very nice. Even went in & out with him so he could smoke while they were waiting on all the paperwork to be approved. They did have to handcuff him, but it’s not the first time he’s been handcuffed - he was OK with that part.

[Catherine]

I wholeheartedly agree with Doctor

[Catherine]

If you have CIT officers and you call them…He should be held 72 hours at least if he is deemed harmful to himself or others. I would not call police not trained in mental illness though.

[Doctor]

I understand. You should’ve still taken him to the hospital. If he doesn’t want to go voluntarily, call the police. He’s mentally ill and would be sent for a hospital, but even if he weren’t, jail is better than him ending up dead or killing someone.

[Sheyelo]

How do I look up a crisis phone number for help?

[Doctor]

Where do you live?

Try these:

• https://www.mentalhealth.gov/get-help/immediate-help/
• http://www.nami.org/Find-Support/NAMI-HelpLine

[Mom2]

Sheyelo, psychiatric wing of the hospital should know the number. My son walked in with me once only to be obstinant and want back out. Someone there first said we can’t admit him unless he wants treatment, then when I persisted gave me a phone number and separated us. She told me to go back out and call this number for a CIT officer. I did and waited in the waiting room. Seems like it only took 20 minutes for them to get there. Officer was female, was great, had a son same age and even went out to smoke with him. She told him she had to take medicine also and it really helped her function better. Long story short, she talked him into admitting himself.

I should have put that number in my phone for future use. I hope by now your son has been committed and you are safe.

Please know that I am sorry that this is happening, especially now. I will pray that God sends an angel to you and your son to protect and guide you through this journey. I ask that you also pray for our families.

[ILoveMySon]

Dear Sheyelo,
There is a crisis team in most counties that you can call. They will come out and assess your son’s mental state. If he is a threat to his own or anyone else’s safety, that qualifies him for involuntary commitment. The mental health hospital in your county will know of their number. The police may also know it. The crisis team is trained on how to deal with a mentally ill person, which is much better than being addressed by police who are not trained for this. The way of dealing with a mentally ill person is radically different from the way police address a criminal. Some police departments have a unit of officers trained in this, and now, some whole police departments take the training. It is of vital importance that whomever comes be trained in this. It is also vitally important that you make the call right away, and take yourself out of harm’s way, until they get there.

Bless you and your son.

ILoveMySon

[Sheyelo]

Thank you @ILoveMySon. I’m locked in my bedroom again bc he is on another rampage. I’ve called NAMI hotline and am waiting for a call back to see how to best handle this in my town.

God bless everyone and their loved ones whom we all try to help! I’m praying for us all!!

[Doctor]

Call the police if he’s on another rampage. There’s no need for you to be locked in a room in your own house because you’re afraid of someone.