I live with this person. He is my partner. I didn’t know about schizophrenia when we met and at the time he seemed quite capable somehow. The only strange thing was his naivety but that didn’t bother me because I am a woman with strong motherly instincts. And as far as I know, he doesn’t experience hallucinations etc anymore,but he told me he had them in the past but he mentioned about them after we started living together,not before. He is not aggressive or anything, people like him. He is not a typical schizophrenic I guess. He doesn’t isolate himself,on the contrary quite social. He has a lot of relatives but they don’t want to get involved, don’t want to hear from him.
There were times he couldn’t work and I supported him financially but he works whenever he feels fine and finds a good job and he is good at his job. But…he can’t manage his money, gets into debt and sometimes gives his money away to people who he thinks are in need. He often gets used,manipulated by malevolent people. He trusts everybody.(Talking and teaching never works as you may know) That is the main problem. His impulsiveness in financial matters. We broke up once and he started living on his own but ended up being homeless, couldn’t pay his rent although he had a good paying job at the time.
We make plans but rarely follow through them because of a financial crisis he finds himself in. And it is draining,very frustrating. And I sometimes think ’ what am I doing ? How come I’ve found myself in this situation ? ’
I also have a schizophrenic in my family and I sometimes wonder if I am repeating the unhealthy pattern. You know ’ this time I’ll win ’ type of self defeating behavior.
Well, the reason isn’t important. I am with him now and I really love the person. He is a nice person, when everything is ok we have nice time together but when the illness creeps in, I feel drained. For two years, he has been exceptionally better in dealing with life and I have got my hopes up and now we are back to square one.
You have mentioned about unconditional love in my other thread,have been thinking about it.