I feel like I am living with a time bomb. I’m going to make this a brief as possible.
My son has not been diagnosed because I can not get him to a facility or Dr. to actually get a diagnosis. He exhibits all the characteristics of Sz. hears violet voices that are going to grossly kill him. 24/7. Won’t leave his bedroom , won’t talk to anyone, is pretty much in a veg state. Yet he can get up and fix himself a meal but that’s pretty much the extent of it.
He thinks someone is controlling his mind and Ithat I know what’s going on and if I tell my him ( my son) they will kill me.
I am in desperately in need of help and on this journey alone and I don’t know where to turn.
In Oct. he agreed to get help so we got him in to a hospital to do an evaluation. …Complete disaster!!!
My son and I were asked what was going on and I explained he was very parinod. and hearing voices. The problem was when he was with the Dr. He would tell them he wasn’t.
His social worker wouldn’t listen to me even though I said he admitted I he was hearing voices and parinod in front of both myself and the Dr when he was admitted. They didn’t care because he wasn’t saying it when the Dr asked again. ( of course not, he was parinod)
. Needless to say they sent him home.
I have called the crisis center on 5 separate occasions to only have them leave him because he presents well when need be. I am then left with more problems because he doesn’t trust me to begin with.
Where and how do I get help ?? Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated!!
Record him whenever he says something to you like that. Then when needed or he says something like, “They’re trying to kill me/telling me to kill myself,” after you’ve recorded that call 911 and tell them he needs to be committed.
Yes, video or audio record him and get a few times where he presents a threat to himself or others and you have enough to get him committed. If you have a fancy phone it probably can record both video or (more secretly) audio.
@Misty. The first time we were able to get help for my daughter (15 yrs ago) was also her first hospitalization. Okay, this is what happened: In my state there is a mental health crisis line. My mentally ill daughter ended up on the streets and found her way to another state. A total stranger called us and told us her family has my daughter. The son of of this family found my daughter on the streets and called his mother that he found a girl that looks like she doesn’t belong on the streets. His mother told him to bring her home and she was there 2 or 3 days when she finally got my daughter to give her our phone number.
She called my family and my oldest daughter drove there and then brought her home and because my daughter was extremely agitated, paranoid and hallucinating my oldest daughter told her sister that she had to stop at a hotel for the night. Once they got their room my oldest daughter told her little sister that she was going to the lobby to get more tea bags.
It was then that my oldest daughter called the mental health crisis line and told them she was afraid of her sister and that she was very ill in the hotel room. A mental care health worker came to the hotel room, called the police and then had the police take her to the hospital where the mental health care worker met them. That was the first time my daughter saw an actual psychiatrist. From there we took over and have been advocating for her ever since.
I thank God that strangers helped my daughter when she was on the street.
Molly - your oldest daughter is one smart girl!
Dear Misty,
I’m so sorry you and your son are going through this. Your family’s situation is sadly common for people who have severe mental illness (or other type of psychosis) without understanding what is happening to them.
I honestly don’t know what you can do, but do try to communicate with your son in kind and caring ways: Schizophrenia.com, 60 Tips for Living with Schizophrenia; tips for coping, handling schizophrenia crisis and relapse situations The link also has communication skills for crisis and during psychosis.
We are all in a variety of impossible situations where our ill loved ones need allies and also require medical care that they do not believe will help them. Here is the website that has legal criteria for treatment in each of the 50 states. The moment your son displays these to a person who can treat him or get him to treatment, it’s time to act: Family and Loved Ones - Treatment Advocacy Center
Until then, you mostly need to take care of yourself and your son as best you can. Sadly, your son may become so ill that he can no longer manage his behavior during a meeting with crisis team or doctors. That is when he might receive treatment if laws in your state allow treatment for “grave disability.”
I hope for the best for your family.
First I just want to thank every one for their advice. My problem is if I try to record him and he sees that I would be afraid of his reaction since he is so parinod.
When the crisis team has been her they see the fear I have but leave anyway.
It doesn’t really say he wants to kill himself or me I just fear he will try to stop what he thinks is going to happen by hurting me or other family members.
This is all very new to me as of Aug 2016. I thought it was his drug abuse before that but no longer uses since Oct. 2016.
I’m wanting to try him on Profrontal (Sarcosine) but as always …he won’t try it. I know it’s an add on with meds but that is never going to happen.
How long do they stay in a phycosis state without meds.?
He isn’t eating or sleeping the last few days and the parinod is pretty bad.
God let me wake up from this horrible nightmare!
Just pretend you’re doing something on your phone and hit the record button. I’ve done it before. I understand. Why not put the Sarcosine in his food? It’s done wonders for my fiancé. They can be in psychotic state with and without meds, usually lasts for hours, at worst a few days. If he’s not eating or sleeping, you could call the police and tell them the symptoms and say you’re worried about his health and that he needs to be checked by a doctor. They institutionalize people with anorexia like that even if they deny that they’re not eating. I’m not saying your husband is anorexic, but it would be a good play to get him in a hospital. Then you can speak to the doctors and tell them what you think is going on so that they can evaluate him. My fiancé wasn’t eating well and was in 133. He’s currently weighing 164 thanks to meds and he’s not starving because of paranoia of GMOs, pesticides, or preservatives.
Once my son stops eating and sleeping, he goes downhill very fast.
Usually at about 5 days of that, he’s still awake, but presents almost as if he was overdosing on drugs.
At that point, anyone who evaluates him should be able to see that he’s gravely disabled, a danger to himself, not capable of self-care or protecting himself from harm, and incapable of consenting to treatment.
My son has been on 3 involuntaries because he was in that kind of condition.
If you want to get him treated, look up the law in your state & memorize it. Don’t forget that a danger to self can be more than threatening to take his own life - it can be a lot of other things.
The father of my child was diagnosed almost a year ago… he was the exact same way. The first time he was willing to go to get away from his aunts house, the second time he was forced due to a court order… he ended up fleeing and getting passed hospital security until the cops found him… it’s very tough. But depending on what your state laws are, you could probably do the same. My advice is be veryyyy patient with him and keep reassuring him that everything is ok. Lots of encouragement as well… it’s tough but keep in faith!
There is very little you can do if he does not meet criteria, but if he becomes distressed, offer to take him to the emergency department or to make an appointment with your family doctor. Let him know that they can help him with not sleeping??
It sounds like he is having a hard time. If your state has a “grave disability” statute as part of the involuntary commitment laws, not eating qualifies where we live.
Psychosis can last quite some time. Psychosis is now sometimes described on a 1 - 5 spectrum with one being manageable and five being separated from shared reality. If he makes it to a four or five and is very distressed, only professionals can help. Everyone has different severity and length of episodes.
Best to you.
What brand of Sarcosine are you using and is he on meds?
Powder City and he’s on 200 mg of Seroquel for Schizoaffective and 10 mg of Buspar for OCD and Anxiety.
I hope you don’t mind me asking but does he have parinoa? Just trying to understand the different meds and what they work on.
What difference do you see with the Sarcosine?
Yes, he does. He has a lot of delusions about things and people. He thinks I work for the government and that I have a chip in my brain because I accurately predict things that he’s going to do or say before he does it. Sarcosine has boosted his mood and improved his memory. He started playing music again and he’s now writing a book. I think it’s restoring his brain cells a little. He goes back and forth between saying things that are true and insightful and things that are not. Sometimes he’s aware of his disorder, other times he just makes excuses and blames everyone around him.
Sounds familiar. So, would you say there is less delusion since Sarcosine?
I guess. With the anxiety meds, he started drinking water which he hadn’t in two years. Could be a combination.
If he isn’t eating and has eaten for days, he now presents a harm to himself. I went thru this for about 7 days with my husband because he wouldn’t eat or touch anything that was “pink” in the refrigerator or cabinets. So sad…
Try to get him help again and as sad as this sounds, you may have to lie and tell them that he is threatening you and you fear for your life. Lying sucks, but sometimes you have to lie to get them the help they need. I hope things get better for you and your son gets the help he needs. Good Luck!
I do not know what is the best thing to do, but I think lying to or about our family members would make us untrustworthy.
Again, I do not know what is best and our family has had a very hard time. Might our difficulties have been avoided if I had lied or pushed for treatment in some other untruthful way? I don’t know.
Never press charges. Also, whatever you say may go on a medical record, which could become part of court testimony whether you choose that or not.
Hereandhere,
You are right…lying does make us untrustworthy. But in the schizophrenic’s eyes, you are untrustworthy anyway. If my husband could not get help for the state of mind he may be in and he is a master performer when he is being evaluated by the crisis unit, and I’m worried about what he may do, then a lie at that point can only help him. Most of the time, I have been lucky and the crisis unit kept him based on what I said which was the truth, but this last time he went in and they released him the next day only to be arrested by the end of the week and charged with a crime, I wish I lied to save him from himself. If I would have told them a small lie, he would have never been arrested. I could have saved him, me and my son a ton of grief because now my sister inlaw will not allow him back into his mother’s house which is where we live. She is the power of attorney over her mother. Now he is living in a motel a few miles away and I am having to scramble to find a place to live for all 3 of us. At this point with his antics, I feel like I don’t want to live with him anymore, I don’t want him to move somewhere with me only to repeat the same behavior and have us all end up homeless. I cannot have that for my son, who is only 11. Yeah…I should have lied!