Hi Good morning my name is Tega and I have a story to tell which in it lies a solution to so many people’s problems but first let me tell my story. I was born in a religious home so naturally, I was taught how to keep calm and worry less about nothing because I had God and my case was settled so I had nothing to worry about all I had to do was to look up to Jesus the author and finisher of my faith. Little did I know that being a Christian doesn’t spare me from the troubles of the world. As a child, I struggled with retention in class and as I grew older it became worse till my fourth year in the University when it felt like my brain had finally closed up and I was without a brain nor a mind of my own.
I was confused, less motivated, struggled with brain fog, high blood pressure till I slid Into depression and at this point I didn’t know what was wrong with me but I just knew I had no control of my emotions, I became withdrawn from the things I loved and was motivated to do nothing. My grades in school were great as a child but as I grew older and my brain closed up I found it hard to concentrate in class talk less of even bother about school. Now in all these times, I was suffering silently I totally didn’t know what was wrong with me because I felt like as a growing child it was normal to have experiences like this. I once did a couple of things that over 2 hours later I wondered why I couldn’t remember what happened but like I always thought I’m growing and my mind wasn’t functional so it worried me less.
I went through my days in the university not being motivated to do any school work because for every time I tried to read something my brain goes blank almost immediately, no matter how hard i tried nothing seemed to stick Including the simplest of things. That went on for many years that when I look back in wonder how I was able to graduate a mechanical engineering even though my grades is something I’m not proud of. In 2009 the medical condition became worse and because I had zero orientation about mental health issues didn’t even know there was something as healthy mind and brain because on my side of the world the mental people are the lunatics we see roaming the streets and I wasn’t that so there was no way I’d have known there was something wrong with my mental health.
I went through life with zero awareness of my self or surrounding or the people around me because I communicated soundly, wasn’t aggressive, enjoyed activities every other child enjoyed and was usually the star player of such events. But like I said as I grew older the brain Fog got worse and by 2011 I had withdrawn to my self.
In 2010 I held on to religion because that was the only thing my brain seemed to understand and function properly with it did that for many years and was Involved in nothing else. I joined a unit, went for every meeting Monday through Sunday and was the only human or social activity I could relate to that time. I did this for many years until one day I had suffered so much and suicide felt like a quick option. All these this times suicidal thoughts steadily played around my mind cos brain was fogged and nothing I ever thought felt right. I was withdrawn, I had no friends, I had no allies, I became broke and life didn’t mean much to me. In Sept 2015 I was attacked in a robbery so thoughts from that finally almost became the final straw for me seeing as life had become nothing but a pile of mess.
I was depressed, without a girlfriend and nothing about life seemed to make sense. Till one night I walked Into a pharmacy knowing no one talks about mental health here so telling anyone there was something not right about me may have been me giving people, the right to judge me over something that even me doesn’t understand. I sighted a drug for brain performance and for one I knew that drugs existed that could help me at least be smart enough after going through school and failing woefully. I picked up that drug and from there I got brave and chose self-medication to help my situation.
Two years down the line I can comfortably beat my Chest and say I’m not depressed, I don’t suffer hypertension anymore, my brain fog has cleared, my awareness is also with crisp sharp attention. My ability to understand things is great and dyslexia I thought I suffered has cleared up with evidence of this sound mail I’m writing.
I have seen people suffer depression and most recently on social media I read various people rich and poor, kids and old people choose taking Thier lives as an option. I think I’d be able to help in research in the world finally dealing with this heartbreaking mental illness called depression, anxiety and brain fog.I really get mad when people see them as being given selfish but I always say In my head. You don’t know the pain so you can talk about it like you understand them. I have been there and was almost a casualty too. Now my biggest Blessing is I have silently re-slotted my self back into my community, I hang with friends nowadays and don’t feel weird around during them.
I feel better even though I know my progress isn’t over I’m over 90 percent better than I was 4 years ago. Before now I felt my brain was that of a child, but today I know there is a fully functional adult mind In my head. The road here has been self-medication because like I’ve said mental health isn’t one of those needs that get to be talked about around my people because the only conclusion is I’m insane and the next possible solution is spiritual homes for healing and cure. I was armed with this knowledge so I promised my self I’d rather suffer in silence than seek help and people who have zero knowledge of what I’m suffering would tag me a mentally ill person. One night I found a drug in a pharmacy and went on Google to read it up and saw it could help me calm down 5 days later I got it and that was where my road to redemption started. I took other drugs a doctor friend prescribed to me and from there different combinations has put me back on my feet in sound mind.
The last 7 months have been great because I’m calmer now, Not anxious, not depressed, without hypertension, not confused, I’m aware of what I do now, the brain fog has cleared off and all in all, I feel all whole again. Now to my point to why I’m sending this mail. I feel like I may be onto something brilliant that saves people and my not being able to sponsor my research and not having the necessary medical qualifications no one would want to listen to me knowing I’m just wanting to pull a test on people with certification and I know there are laws guiding against that. You could sponsor my research and I’d be willing to show your doctors how different combinations of drugs not only made me better but gave me and other people who suffer anxiety and depression a chance at life.